If You Ever Come Back
by VampiresObsessed
Summary: Edward didn't come back after New Moon. Bella didn't jump off the cliff and never woke from her catatonic state in that way. A few months later, Bella decides to attend college in Florida. A fateful encounter brings Bella back to Forks scarred with the problem of his world. Bella waits for Edward's arrival hoping he'll want to see her at least.
1. Summary

**If You Ever Come Back**

**_Summary_**

_ Bella is still waiting. Edward left her a long time ago and never came back. What if New Moon never took place and Alice never saw Bella jump? What would have happened if Bella never saw those bikes and never got that rush from hearing Edward? What if Laurent never came to check on Bella because he was killed by the wolves? What if the wolves killed Victoria that fateful day in the woods?_

_ Bella has nothing to worry about anymore because since New Moon never happened the Volturi don't even know her._

_ Bella still waits finally graduating high school. Renee is there to see her daughter but this isn't her daughter anymore. Bella is a shadow of her former self. She's paler than normal and not to mention her body is almost nothing but skin and bones._

_ Renee convinces Bella to leave Forks and attend college somewhere else. So she does and leaves Forks to go to college. Only to return after a fateful encounter that changes her life once again. No matter how much Edward didn't want her to be a part of his life she is forever scared with the problem of his world._

_ So Bella waits hoping that if he ever comes back he'll still want her or at least want to see her._


	2. Prologue

**Prologue.**

The forest was dark. I couldn't even see my hand in front of me. The hair on the back of my neck stood up telling me there was something out here with me. I could practically smell the terror in wind.

I tugged my jacket over my hands hoping to cover from the harsh wind. My backpack was heavy again. The books inside weren't helping me to get through this forest. Why the hell did I decide to come in these woods in the first place?

It was simple. I missed Forks. I missed the forest smell. I missed the silence of the woods with only the sounds of the birds and the leaves. Nothing was the same here. The sun was too hot. There weren't enough cool days. I wanted to go back home. Florida wasn't my home, it never would be.

I rolled my eyes trying to see a shimmer of light. I didn't remember walking that far into the woods when it was daylight. I just walked a couple feet into the tree line the last I remembered. I groaned pulling my phone from my pocket. I didn't get along with my roommate Rebecca. To be honest the girl was somewhat of a slut. She had a different boy in her bed all the time. She had night classes while I had classes during the day. The only good thing was she was about to leave the college for another university that had the better classes for her degree.

I flipped the phone open checking the time.

_9:56pm_

I had been out here for hours. Rebecca would be in her last class of the night and probably go to a party afterward. She wasn't any help right now. I looked up at the battery life and groaned. The battery was in the dark red letting me know it was about to go dead. To top things off I had no service.

I groaned looking around. I was lost. It was obvious. I was lost in a forest close to my college. No matter what I did I was lost. I couldn't change that. It was a danger magnet. My ex vampire boyfriend had left me so I leave for college only to get lost in the forest by my college. I wouldn't be surprised if I was murdered here tonight.

I sighed and started walking again. I hated walking in the forest. It was never easy for me walking in the forest. My feet tripped over almost everything. That's when I heard it. I heard the snap of a tree limb when I stopped frustrated.

My eyes widen as I heard the wind whoosh. I was frozen in place. I couldn't move an inch. I smelled something sticky sweat almost like iron. I knew the smell in that instant. The smell of blood. I didn't know whose or what's blood it was. I just knew it was blood.

I was still frozen in pure fear. I suddenly stood erect causing my backpack to fall to the ground. A growl filled the air causing a gasp to come from my throat. I turned on my heel and ran as quick as I could. I knew I wasn't fast enough. Deep in the back of my mind I knew what was chasing me. A vampire.

I probably wouldn't survive the night. Forget college, forget forks, forget Renee, and forget Charlie. Tonight I would probably die or be changed into a vampire. Neither one seemed like a great thing. I remembered the time when I once wanted to become a vampire. It was because I didn't want to grow old and leave **him**. I refused to leave him behind because I loved him. Now if I was changed into a vampire it would be a sentence that would kill me. To live forever and never see my true love again.

I gasped running as the sound got closer. I could feel the tears streaming down my cheeks. The wind was hot against my face. It was warm outside since it was Florida during the fall season. I quickly dodged another tree limb grateful for my speed.

I was prolonging the inevitable. No matter what I did, this vampire was probably going to kill me. I forced my legs to stop. My running was probably fun for this vampire. I had read so many things about vampires loving the chase and the hunt. James loved the chase. It was something that he liked about me. **He **would stop at nothing to protect me and that made the hunt more enjoyable.

I closed my eyes sucking in a deep breath before I turned around. The forest was still pitch black in front of me. I couldn't see anything. There were no sounds.

I gasped before I yelled, "If you want me, have me! I'm not going to run anymore, it's hopeless, right? Nothing I do will change this, I should have known!"

I heard the chuckled. It was feminine and sounded young, "You're right, running is useless."

I saw the ray of light causing me to pull up my hand to block it from my eyes. I saw a glimpse of blonde hair and red eyes before I felt the pain. I felt them bite my neck sending my body to the ground. They were strong. I let myself remember everything from my life.

Before I closed my eyes I let myself say his name one last time, **_"Edward."_**

When I opened my eyes, I didn't know how much time had passed. My neck hurt and I remembered the horrible pain I had endured. The fire that seemed to burn underneath my skin. It was the worst pain I had ever suffered through.

I sighed looking around and it was then that I saw the ray of light hit my skin. My skin shimmered and sparkled and I knew. No matter how much **he **didn't want me to be a part of his world I was now forever scarred with his world. I was what **he **didn't want for me. I was now a vampire.


	3. 1

**1.**

I sighed as I packed away another box. Renee would be proud of me right now. I know she would. I could hear the footsteps of Charlie on the steps. I roll my eyes at his eavesdropping.

I grab another box from the floor along with the duct tape. Suddenly a knock comes on the door causing me to look at the door. Charlie never waits for me to invite him in.

The door comes open and Charlie stands in the doorway looking inside and smiling at me.

"Hey Bells I was just coming to see how far along you are at packing. I have to go by the station for a couple of hours. Are you going to be okay here alone?"

I smile biting the tape with my teeth and nod, "Of course, dad. Angela should be here soon."

He nods grinning, "Of course, I forgot about her. Is your mother meeting you at the airport?"

I nod giving him the smile he's looking for, "She should be. She emailed me last night telling me she would. She's ecstatic that I took her up on attending college in Florida."

He nods giving me a small smile, "Yeah, I could tell. Florida will do you some good, Bells. Get some sun and visit more often."

I nod, "Sure thing, dad."

He looks around and I can tell that his emotions are trying to get the better of him. I know before he even says anything that he wants to get away. Neither one of us are good with our emotions. I decide to be the one to let him go.

"Go ahead, Dad. I'll just be in here packing these bags. You don't need to be in here."

I spread the gray duct tape on the brown box as dad rubs his chin in fluster. He sighs, "I'll see you when I get back. Don't forget to pack up your things from the truck."

I smile nodding, as I make sure the box is sealed nice and tight. Dad quickly turns on his heel walking down the stairs. I shake my head as I hear him grabbing his jacket and gun belt.

My eyes move around my bedroom seeing all the taped boxes lining the floor. My bed was bare since I decided to take the purple bedding with me. An image of my mother at my graduation comes mind causing me to giggle. I haven't laughed much in the last couple of years. The laugh feels almost foreign.

I smile shaking my head. Mom wasn't very subtle about me going to college back in Florida. She all but demanded that I attend college there. I didn't much of a choice. I was leaving everything behind. I knew it was for the best but I had this horrible feeling that something wasn't right.

I walked over to my bedroom window watching my father climb into his police cruiser. He wasn't taking the news as well as I hoped. He and mom might have agreed it was best but he didn't like the idea of me leaving here.

I watched his car back and leave toward the police station. I didn't know what could be more important than spending your daughter's last day with her at home. Tomorrow morning I would be boarding a plane for Florida. I would be leaving Forks behind in the dust.

I sighed, walking back into my room. I was lucky enough for a rare sunny day today. The sun peaked out from behind the clouds shining in my window and I smiled. For the first time in such a long time I felt happy. I knew there was no chance **he **be coming back. Just thinking about him made me want to stay. Even if there was a small percentage that he would come back, it was enough to force me to stay.

I sighed as my eyes found a picture of myself and my friends. Jessica and Mike were still going strong, attending the same college together. Angela and Ben wanted to get out of Washington so they were attending a college in California. Their parents went crazy with that idea but they supported them.

I walked over to my dresser. This was the part I hated most. There were things in my dresser than I had refused to acknowledge in the past few months. I pulled the drawer opened and looked down in the contents. There were things from my eighteenth birthday that **they **had gotten me. My fingers pulled everything from the drawer sitting it down on top of the dresser.

I slammed the drawer shut and looked at the contents I pulled out. My fingers moved against the papers until the picture came into view. My eyes softened and a sad smile appeared on my face. I held the picture up to my face and trailed my fingers over the picture.

All the feelings I had pushed away were resurfacing. I closed my eyes feeling the tears trying to fall and slammed the picture down.

_No! I will not let him win again!_

I turned over the picture and stuffed all those things in a folder. I held the folder in my hands and walked over to an empty box. I dropped everything into that box and looked around. My bookshelf was hardly empty. I groaned trudging over to my bookcase. I started grabbing books from the shelves and stuffed them into the same box.

As I grabbed the gray duct tape again I heard a car pull up the drive. A grin came to my face as I used my teeth to cut the tape and spread it out smoothly on the top of the box. Once it was sealed I walked over to the window to see who had pulled in.

My best friend, Angela Weber, was stepping out of her car with her boyfriend Ben. I watched her smile and laugh at something he said while he grabbing things from her backseat. There were even more boxes in his hands and Angela grabbed a backpack from the backseat before they walked toward the front door.

I sighed turning around and walking out of my bedroom. The house was mostly quiet besides Angela and Ben's voices outside the door. I trudged down the stairs toward the door. I straightened my hair in the side mirror as Angela knocked on the door.

"Bella? It's Angela and Ben."

I chuckled grabbing the knob and pulling the door opened. Even though it was sunny outside the temperature was still a little chilly as usual. Angela grinned at me while Ben just smiled pleasantly.

"Come on in guys. My dad had to go to the station for a couple of hours."

Angela and Ben walked into the house looking around. Angela had been in the house more than Ben. I smiled at them, "I didn't know Ben was coming."

Ben coughed as Angela chuckled, "I hope it's no problem. Mike was busy helping Jessica along with Lauren. He was bored and I told him he could help."

I sighed pretending to be upset. Ben groaned, "I can just leave if this is a girl moment type thing."

Angela rolled her eyes and I chuckled, "It's no problem. I was just joking. I should warn you that we've got our work cut out for us."

Angela sighed while Ben went wide-eyed. I chuckled walking up the stairs, "Come on guys, we haven't got all day."

I heard their footsteps following me up the stairs. I entered my bedroom smiling at the all the boxes that lined the floor. Angela and Ben walked in and Ben cleared his throat, "What exactly are you going to do with all these boxes?"

I shrugged, "Good question, Ben. My dad is buying a storage to put most of it in. I want to come back to Forks after I graduate. Renee thinks I need the time away for a while."

Angela grinned nodding, "I could understand why she would think that. Anyway what else needs to be boxed up?"

I smiled nodding toward the bookcase, "Just the bookcase is left, I'm afraid. It's taking the longest to pack up."

Angela giggled, "Well let's get started."

I nodded and we quickly started packing up the bookcase. Ben was extra helpful stacking the boxes in the corner. I was happy Angela had brought him along with her. He didn't seem to mind helping us pack up my things.

Angela and I were tapping one of the second to last boxes. Ben was downstairs getting himself something to drink. We had been at this for over an hour and half. I had worked up such an appetite. I was curious when Charlie was getting home so I could start on dinner.

I sighed as Angela smeared the tap across the top of the box. She smiled at me, "Are you excited about attending college in Florida?"

I shrug, "I'm not sure really. I never expected to attend college in Florida in the first place. I'm a little excited about being close to Renee again. It's a big change and I don't know how I'm dealing with change again."

She nodded, "I understand. I've never been through change like that before. California is a big change for Ben and me. Jessica is trying to talk Mike into coming with us. She applied for our college, she's waiting for a response."

I smiled nodding, "If she doesn't get once soon she won't get accepted."

Angela sighed, "I told her the same thing. She doesn't want to make any definite decisions yet. I personally think Lauren is corrupting her mind."

I chuckle, "Seems that way."

Suddenly I heard the front door open down stairs. My eyes widen and I walked over to the window. Charlie's cruiser was in the driveway.

"Bells?"

I groaned as Angela smiled at me. Ben walked into the room his eyes wide, "I thought he was going to shoot me or something."

I giggled rolling my eyes, "He just didn't know you were coming. I better go see what he wants."

Angela nodded as her and Ben began talking. I walked out of the room trudging down the stairs. I saw Charlie's jacket back on the rack while his gun belt hung from the same hook. I walked through the living room toward the kitchen.

Charlie was at the sink rinsing out a glass, "Yeah dad?"

If I didn't call him dad he would give me that look.

He turned around with a grin on his face, "I just wanted to know how the packing's going?"

I smiled, "Angela and Ben have helped big time. We have probably two more boxes and then we're done."

He smiled, "Well I hope you don't mind I invited Billy and Jacob over for dinner. They wanted to see you before you left tomorrow."

I smiled nodding, "Do you have anything in mind that you want to eat?"

He shrugged rubbing his chin, "Well that casserole that you made a few weeks ago would be great. I'm certainly going to miss your cooking, Bells."

I smiled stepping toward him. He smiled at me but I could see the uncertainty and worry clouding his irises. I pushed back my fear and displeasure as I threw my arms around his body. He gasped as he stood completely erect while I hugged him. I sucked in a deep breath of his aftershave. I would miss Charlie so much while I'm in Florida. I might not know just how much I'll miss him but I know I will miss him with all my heart.

He pulls his arms around me after a few seconds. We stood in his kitchen hugging each other. Neither one of us wanted this moment to end. Unfortunately I had friends upstairs and they grew restless.

I heard Ben's voice on the stairs with Angela right behind him. Charlie and I pulled away before they walked in the kitchen. Angela smiled at me a knowing smile at that, "We finished with the boxes, Bella."

I smiled nodding, "Thanks so much. Do you guys want to stay for dinner?"

Angela smiled but shook her head, "I'm afraid we can't. Our families are eating dinner tonight in honor of us leaving tomorrow. I have to help cook while Ben makes sure everything is packed up for tomorrow."

I smile walking toward her. She smiled as we opened our arms hugging each other, "Take care of yourself, Angie."

She chuckled. It was a nickname I started using shortly after I came out of my depression. It was something that no one else used with her and she loved it.

We pulled back, "Be careful, Bella. Remember to call me when you get settled in."

I nodded, "Sure thing."

Ben came behind her then placing his hands on her shoulders, "We have to get going, Ange."

She groaned rolling her eyes, "I know that, Benny, I was just saying goodbye to Bella. She's leaving early in the morning in case you forgot."

Ben rolled his eyes stepping around Angela toward me. He came to me throwing his arms around me, "Be safe, Bella. We don't need anything happening to you."

I nodded in his arms, "I'll be safe. You two should get going before your families call out a search party."

Angela giggled rolling her eyes while Ben chuckled, "Ain't that the truth. Bye Bella, take care."

Angela waved before Ben pulled her to the door. I sighed turning around and smiling at Charlie. He smiled, "I'm going in the living room to watch the game. Billy and Jacob should be over by the time you finish."

I nodded, "I'll be in here cooking."

He nodded walking into the living room. I sighed moving to the fridge and cabinet getting ready to cook some food.

By the time I finished cooking, I placed the plates around the tables. There was a knock on the door and I heard Charlie in the living room, "I'll get it Bells."

I sigh, moving back to the counter to put the empty dishes in the sink. I wasn't looking forward to this dinner. Jacob and I weren't getting along. During the time when I was still depressed, Jacob had been forced to come check on me again.

Charlie and Billy's doings of course. It was so annoying. I had taken it out on poor Jacob at the time. We hadn't talked much since then. Charlie was sure to tell me how big Jacob had gotten. It was as if he had finally hit the growth spurt according to Charlie.

I heard Charlie open the door and let our guests walk on in the house. I sucked in a deep breath and plastered a fake smile on my face. I hadn't seen Jacob in about a year now. He never came over with Billy anymore. Since his growth spurt I hadn't seen his face at all.

I heard voices walking closer to the kitchen. Charlie walked in first following by Billy in his wheelchair. I looked up seeing Jacob pushing his father into the kitchen. For a moment I was stunned. This didn't look like Jacob anymore.

His hair was cut short, he was probably a good two feet taller than me now, and he was dressed in shorts with a thin shirt on his body. Even though the sun had been out today it was still so cold. I wondered why he wasn't cold.

Suddenly he smiled and it lit up his entire face. I smiled back, "Hey Jacob, Billy."

Jake smiled widely causing my stomach to tighten. I hadn't felt like this in such a long time. I really didn't want to feel like this anymore either.

"Hiya Bella, how you doing?" said Jake walking around his father's wheelchair.

I smiled shrugging, "I'm doing just fine. College and everything."

His smile faltered, "yeah Charlie said something about that."

Suddenly Charlie and Billy clear their throats letting us know they were still in the room, "Bells?"

I turned to face Charlie, "Yeah dad?"

He smiled, "Billy and I are going into the living room to watch the game. You and Jake can sit in here and try to catch up since you're leaving tomorrow."

I mentally groaned. Since I was leaving tomorrow I didn't want to get Jake's hopes up for us. It was obvious that Jacob had some kind of crush on me that wasn't very healthy.

I pushed aside my thoughts and smiled nodding my head, "Sure thing dad."

He smiled and grabbed his plate after handing Billy his. Billy rolled himself back into the living room while Jacob took a seat at the table. I grabbed the tea jug and my glass before taking a seat at the table across from Jacob.

Jacob looked down at this plate grinning, "This looks great Bells."

I rolled my eyes, "Please don't call me that. Charlie calls me that all the time."

He chuckled nodding as he grabbed his fork before he started eating. I grabbed my own silverware and started eating.

"So Bella, what college are you attending?"

I smile, "Some community college in Florida. It's small and perfect. Renee toured the campus and it's perfectly small. We both figured a small campus would be better than a huge one to get used to the environment."

Jacob nodded, "I don't think I'm attending college next year. My dad needs help around the house and I can't abandon him like my sisters did."

I nod frowning, "Billy doesn't see it like that Jake. H would want you to see the world and accomplish your dreams."

Jake's frown deepens, "I'm just not that good in school Bella. I've been missing way too many days of school. I'll be lucky if I even graduate next year."

I shook my head taking a bite of my food. Charlie and Billy started cheering their team on from the living room. Jake and I started laughing. Sometimes I wish my life were always like this.

Once the game was over and the dishes were clean, Jake and Billy left for home. I was sad to see him go but I had my own life to get started on.

Charlie sighed, "Go on upstairs Bells. Your flight leaves really early in the morning."

I smile hugging him quickly before running up the stairs. I walked into my room to see my pajamas I left out on the bed with my outfit for tomorrow. I sighed grabbing the clothes walking into the bathroom.

After my shower, it was a little after nine. I yawned from being up since six this morning. I quickly walked into my room still hearing Charlie downstairs. I quickly snuggled under the covers and fell asleep quickly. I was surprisingly looking forward to my new life in Florida.


	4. 2

**2.**

The next morning was like every other morning. It was a different morning for so many reasons. Today I was leaving for college. I could already hear the commotion from downstairs. I sat up in my bed rubbing the sleep particles out of my eyes.

_Things certainly had changed_, I thought to myself.

I smile to myself hearing footsteps trudging up the stairs. Charlie must be excited for me too. Thoughts invade my brain and I push them away. I refuse to think about that at this particular moment. I heard the footsteps getting closer and I turn toward my bedroom door.

Knock! Knock!

I giggle shaking my head. Just few short months ago, I was depressed. Maybe the idea of college and getting away from here would do me some good. The idea of leaving this place use to sadden me but now it was exciting.

Charlie pushes the door open flipping on the light on the wall smiling brightly at me, "Time to get up Bells. You need to eat. Your flight leaves in four hours and we have a lot to do in that short amount of time."

I smile nodding, "I know dad. I'll be downstairs right after I shower. I need to wake up before I try eating anything."

He sighs before nodding, "Don't take too long Bells."

I nod watching him pull the door close behind him. I shake my head smiling as I stand to my feet. The entire room is chilly and I think to myself about how much I'm going to miss this place. Florida will be a huge change for me from all the years I've spent here. Sometimes I wonder how I ever lived in Arizona after living here for all these years.

I move across the room toward my desk. My clothes sit out shining brightly at me. I thought a pair of capris would work better for the changing climate. I could deal with capris at the airport and they would be cool enough once I land in Florida.

I sigh grabbing the pants and the shirt. A white short-sleeve top covers the cami that I'll be wearing. I smile carrying the clothes out of the room down the hall. The bathroom is small and cozy. Things like this will be different in Florida. I'll have to live in a coed dorm and share a simple bathroom with thousands of other people.

I sigh closing the door behind me before turning on the water letting the steam fill the room.

I step out of the bathroom walking back down to my room carrying my bag of bathroom supplies. I shake my head in an attempt to clear my head. I should have known that things wouldn't be easy today. My thoughts center on staying here in this room for the rest of my existence.

I walk over to the window staring out at the trees and all the green.

_He wanted it to be as if he never existed. What he doesn't know is I'll never be the same because of his once presence here. When they left, they took everything with them. It still feels like I've been punched in the chest sometimes._

I turn around finding a pair of flats pulling them on my feet before walking out of the room. I know if I don't eat something soon Charlie will go crazy. I jog downstairs toward the kitchen. The living room flat screen has the weather channel playing loud and clear. Charlie is at the table reading the paper as usual while drinking from his cup of coffee.

I smile moving toward the cabinets and the fridge. I find a bowl filling it with some Captain Crunch and some milk from the fridge. I smile at Charlie as he looks up from his paper. His eyes are little glassy causing me to advert my eyes quickly.

I take a seat at the table stuffing my face with cereal. Every time he looks up to talk, I stuff my mouth with food again. In some far off sense I know what I'm doing is wrong. I should talk to him before I'm out of his life completely. All of this is reminding me of the first time I tried to leave when **he **was here.

The time when James, the tracker, was after me a few years ago comes to mind. When **he **still cared about me and still wanted me. I sigh looking down at my food. The images of the baseball game come to mind causing me to suck back the tears.

**He **wanted me to leave afterward when I was still in the hospital. I refused and told him that nothing could come between us.

I finish my bowl standing to my feet to place the bowl in the sink.

"I'm going to my room and finish packing my bag, dad."

I hear him sigh as I walk toward the entrance of the kitchen, "Sure thing, Bells. If you need my help I'll be down here."

I sigh walking toward the stairs. I must be the worse daughter on the face of the planet. I'm leaving for college and can't even talk to my father at the breakfast table on my last day here. I quickly make it upstairs to my room pushing the door open. I close the door back and stand in the middle of my room.

The images fill my mind at that moment. Running around my room trying to pack my things to leave before James came to kill Charlie. Sometimes I wish James had killed me that night in the ballet studio. Things would have been less complicated. Other times I wish the transformation had taken place but then I would be roaming the planet for years without **his **love.

I would have just been the pathetic ex-girlfriend **he **can't get rid of.

I move across the room to my laptop connected to wall. I'm taking the laptop with me but I need it for a few minutes before I stuff it in my carry-on bag. I push it open revealing the login screen. I quickly type in the password waiting for the front screen to appear.

I smile at the image of the forest and click the internet explorer. I click the email icon on the toolbar waiting for the page to load. Once the page loaded, I typed in my information for my email and waited for it to load. I clicked my inbox and waited again.

My entire inbox was full.

**_Error in sent, _**covers my entire inbox. I sigh sadly looking at the emails. Alice must have deleted her email address because of **him.**

I know it will never reach her but I must try one last time. I double click the **Create Message **button at the top waiting for it to load. My mind is in overdrive as I see the blank canvas for a new message. I steady my shaking fingers over the keys determined to write this successfully.

_Alice, _

_I wish I had your real address. I wish I could tell you everything that has happened since you left. Things were never the same for anyone after you guys left. I'm not sure what to say exactly. I know this is the last time I'm going to message you. It's useless anyway since I don't know your real address. _

_Anyway, just to catch you up on a few things. I graduated. Yeah I finally made it through horrible Forks High School. Angela and Ben are trying for a college in California. Jessica and Mike are staying within the state of Washington. It was surprising that Angela and Ben wanted to leave and not Jessica. Lauren is going to New York, she's hoping for a chance to make it big._

_I'm sorry, Alice. Maybe I should say something else. I have to tell you something. Renee, she talked me into leaving. Therefore, that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to leave Forks behind. I'm attending college in Florida where I can only hope that __**his **__memory won't follow. Florida will be a huge change but I hope that I can make do. _

_I can't stay in Forks anymore, Alice. For the last two years, I've been trying to forget __**him. **__Everywhere I look, I'm reminded of everything again. Charlie's house holds the biggest reminders. I haven't slept right since that night. Nightmares still plague my mind but I've managed to deal with them. After the first year, they became a part of my life. Charlie thinks that they went away with time. They never went away completely. I've trained my mind to wake me before they get too bad._

_Anyway, Alice, I wanted to tell you I'm leaving. I hope to return someday to Forks after college. I'm still undecided about what I want to do. Hopefully, after sometime in College I can figure that out._

_I'm scared, Alice. I know I don't know what to do. My heart wants me to stay, but my head is telling me to go. I'm going to miss you so very much. This is goodbye, Alice. I hope in some strange way you see this message and it brings you peace if anything. You will always be my sister, Alice. Take care of Jas and make sure __**he **__takes care of himself. I love you, Alice don't ever forget that. I'll miss you every day. _

_This is my last message to you, Alice. I have to end this, and that starts with these messages. I'm going to delete all these messages and cut all ties. This address will be deleted; my friends and my family will be given the new one. _

_I'll miss you forever, Alice. You will always be my sister forever. Goodbye, Alice._

_Until we meet again, _

_Bella Swan._

I wipe away the stray tears from my eyes and cheeks. I hit the send button watching as it returns to my inbox in error. I sigh knowing this will break my heart but it must be done. I hit the check box at the top selecting all the emails. I hover over the delete button debating internally on whether or not to delete this message.

Loud footsteps on the stairs tell me Charlie is coming up any minute. I stare at the delete button, as Charlie's footsteps get closer to my room. Just as I hear his knocking on my door, I hit the button forever deleting the messages.

I quickly stand to my feet grabbing my bag trying to make myself look busy, "Come in, Dad. I'm just filling my bag."

The door opens showing a sad smiling Charlie, "Are you okay, Bells? Yesterday you seemed happy about Florida. Now all of sudden, I'm seeing the old Bella. The one that barely ate or slept and had me worried day and night."

I sigh turning around facing Charlie, "I'm sorry, Dad. I'm just scared and nervous. Florida is all so new to me."

He sighs walking to the bed. Charlie has never been good with these types of conversations. I remember after Christmas when he told me he was going to send me to Renee. I was scared to leave then but it was worse than that it is now. I called Angela after he said all that and we went to the movies but she was called during the movie from her mother. We had to leave early before the movie ended because her mother was ill.

That was one of the more difficult talks, we had.

Charlie sat down on the bed patting the spot beside him, "Bells, I know that college is a scary thing. You don't have anything to worry about though. Renee is going to watch you like a Hawk. I'll be okay, Bells. You don't have to worry about me. Sue will make sure that everything around here will be just okay."

I smile shaking my head. I don't understand how those two got started. I remember Harry Clearwater dying from a heart attack. I attended the funeral along with Charlie but everything's fuzzy. I don't remember half of what happened. Soon after that, Charlie started hanging out more and more in La Push. I had started to believe he was with Billy all the time until Billy called one night he was in La Push. After that call with Billy, I just knew Charlie had found someone.

"I know, dad. I'm just worried about everything, I guess. Florida is a lot different from forks. I suppose I'm just scared like I used to be."

He shakes his head, "When you first came here you were scared Bells. Forks was a big change for you but you managed just fine. Florida will be the same thing."

I smile nodding, "I guess you're right."

Sometimes I wish I could tell him the truth. I wish I wasn't scared of him being angry for still missing them. In the back of my mind, I knew I would never stop missing them. I would never stop loving **him **but I had to keep up the charade for Charlie and Renee's sake. They didn't need to know I'd never be the same Bella I was before I met **him**.

I stood to my feet grabbing my bag smiling at Charlie, "We should finish these bags so I can make my plane on time.

Charlie chuckles nodding as he stands to his feet walking over to my closet.

We drove all the way to Seattle for my plane. There weren't any better flights closer to Forks so I was stuck with this option. Charlie kept the cruiser quiet along the way. My fingers twisted around as we suddenly stopped at a service station.

He chuckles at my face, "A few people wanted to say bye before you left."

My eyebrows crinkle in confusion as Charlie steps out of the car. My nerves are in overdrive as he walks around the cruiser. I unbuckle my belt pushing the door open and stepping out. A car next to us and a truck open wide before I'm confronted with people I recognize.

Jessica and Mike stand together with Tyler and Lauren. The truck opens to reveal Jacob, Billy, Sue, and her kids, Leah and Seth Clearwater.

Leah has always hated me for reasons I can't understand. I always wonder if she hates me because of Charlie and Sue getting together. I never stopped Charlie from being with Sue. I thought it was time for him to find someone that he loved and would love him back.

I grin at Jessica as she opens her arms wide for me. I step to her wrapping my arms around her in a tight hug. Mike is next and then Tyler. Lauren shakes my hand her eyes glaring at me. Something's will never change.

I turn toward Billy and Jacob. Billy smiles at me as I bend down to give him a huge hug, "Take care of yourself over there, Bella. We don't want to hear from Charlie that something horrible happens."

I chuckle nodding my head, "Sure thing, Billy."

Jacob sighs as I step toward him, "I'm going to miss you, Bella. Try not to change too much and visit sometime."

I nod as I step to give him a hug. He hugs me back tightly and I can smell his scent from his skin. A scent so strong filled with dirt like quality. A smell of the forest and the trees even the mud and rain fills his scent.

I pull back looking at Sue holding her kids. Seth grins widely at me but Leah glares at me. I sigh hugging Sure around her neck, "Take care of Charlie for me, Sue. He can't live off pizza and take out forever."

She smiles giggling a little bit, "Sure will, Bella. I will make sure he is well taken care of."

I smile moving to Seth, "Seth, you be sure to stay out trouble and don't give Charlie or Sue any grief."

He smiles hugging me tightly. Seth and Leah have become part of my family even if Leah seems to hate my existence. I turn toward Leah feeling the tension around me from everyone else. They don't know how Leah is going to react to me.

I step toward her watching her glare intensify, "Leah, I just want to tell you to take care of yourself. I don't know what I've done to hurt you but I want you to know that I consider you my sister. Take care of your mom, Seth, and my dad for me. With me being gone, Charlie is going to need some looking after and I can't think of anyone more capable of doing that for me. If you don't want to do it for me than, do it for your mom. She cares for Charlie and she would love it if you tried getting to know my dad more. He's not as bad as you think. He's not trying to take your father's place at all. He just wants to be that shoulder for her and all of you need someone. Just take of yourself. Bye Leah."

I watch her glare soften and a small smile come to her face. She nods, "I'll do my best. Just take of yourself and don't let anything happen to you while you are over there."

I smile nodding, at least I'm getting somewhere with someone. I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn to find Charlie. He smiles at me, "I thought you needed this before you left. We still have some more miles to cover before the airport."

I sigh turning back to everyone smiling, "I'll talk to everyone soon. I'll call Jessica and Mike in a few days. I'll make sure Charlie gives me Jacob and Billy's number to catch up. I'm sure that Charlie will have me talk to Sue when I call him again in a few days. Remember to take care, everyone."

Everyone smiles at me as Charlie places his hand on my back to direct me toward his cruiser. I sigh taking my seat once again pulling the seatbelt over my body. Charlie grins at me as he pulls his belt over himself and starts the cruiser. I wave out the window toward everyone else as Charlie pulls the car out of the parking lot of the service station.

"Thanks for that, dad. I really needed that. I wouldn't have gotten to say goodbye to Jessica or Mike if you hadn't."

He smiles nodding his head, "No problem, Bells. I called their parents and mentioned it to them. Jessica was the first to say yes and then Mike. Lauren and Tyler were difficult to get out but that's understandable. Tyler and Lauren were packing his things for college while Lauren is on her way to New York as you already know."

I smile nodding staring out the window. We were in the car for another hour and half before we finally made it to the airport. Charlie parks the car turning toward me and smiling, "Let's get your bags and then get inside. The rain will be coming down any minute."

I sigh nodding. It was raining in Seattle and I wasn't dressed for the rain. I stepped out walking around to the back of the cruiser. This reminds me so much of when I first arrived. Instead of taking my things out at the airport, we had been loading the car with my suitcases.

I sigh grabbing my carry-on bags from the trunk while Charlie grabs my other bags. I smile at him as he shuts the trunk back turning toward the entrance of the airport. I follow behind him inside the warmer airport. We stand in line getting my ticket and finding the gate my plane would leave. Charlie places my bags on the track for the plane while I walk over to security.

The men with the metal detectors are annoying as they move it across my chest twice. Charlie coughs from behind me causing the man to break off and let me by. I've never been more thankful for Charlie being with me.

We take seats in the waiting area. My flight should board in a few minutes. My fingers twist around themselves in a nervous habit. The airport isn't as packed as a bigger airport would be. The waiting area is empty for the most part. Charlie sighs but doesn't comment. Neither one of us are talkative at this moment. The seriousness of the situation is starting to seep in.

**_"Flight from Seattle to Jacksonville, Florida is now boarding."_**

I bit my lip standing to my feet and turning toward Charlie. He lowers his eyes to the floor sighing before he meets my eyes. His eyes are tearing up causing my eyes to fill with tears as well.

"Take of yourself Bells. I'll miss you but concentrate on your work and make me proud. Listen to your mom and please call me after you get to Renee's place."

I smile nodding as I grab my bag. A sob wants to break through but I keep it at bay. Suddenly my fingers drop my bag to the floor and I throw my arms around Charlie. He stumbles for a second but wraps his arms back around me. Tears stream down my face and I clutch Charlie tighter. Leaving him is harder than I thought it was or maybe he's the only good thing I have left in Forks.

"Take care, dad. Don't eat just take out and pizza. Just be careful and stay you."

He sighs, "Sure thing, Bells. I'll still be right here when you come back. Remember that."

I smile pulling back. I place a small kiss on his cheek grabbing my bag from the floor. I smile at him waving as I turn around.

"Love you, Bells. Don't forget that."

I look over my shoulder smiling, "I love you too, dad. Never forget that."

He smiles as I turn back around on my heel walking toward my gate.


	5. 3

**3.**

It wasn't that big of a surprise that the plane was mostly full to capacity. Just because the airport itself wasn't that full it didn't change anything about the plane. I had a window seat starring out at the clouds the entire time.

There was a man sitting in the seat next to me. I was lucky that he was on a laptop the entire flight with headphones over his ears. Unfortunately, there was a family of three behind me. A little boy with brown curly hair sat right behind me next to a little girl with the same shade of brown hair that made me believe they were siblings.

They were fighting with each other most of the time. The couple sitting across from them in the middle seating kept trying to quiet them down. They had to be around five or six. They weren't listening to a thing the couple was saying. The little boy must have thought it was funny during the beginning of the flight to constantly kick my chair. It wasn't the best flight I'd been through.

The clouds in the sky were pretty much my only way besides the clock to see the time change. My stomach was in a bundle of nerves. I haven't talked to Renee since last week. She and Charlie made all the necessary arrangements concerning my flight and the college.

According to Renee, I would get to tour the college the day after I arrive in Florida, which will be tomorrow. I'll be moving into the college at the end of July, just two months away. It was only May at the moment. I was looking forward to spending some time with my mother. I hadn't spent any real time with her in years. She would call all the time but we didn't have long conversations.

I suppose my new found depression stopped all conversations. Talking to mom just reminded me of the ballet studio. My depression used to stop me from even uttering the words ballet and studio. It didn't matter if they were in the same sentence or apart I couldn't even think about them.

I lean further back into my seat looking around trying to ignore the kids behind me arguing once again. The man next to me thought of a good idea in bringing his laptop and headphones. He wasn't constantly bothered by the insane children behind us.

I saw a stewardess coming down the aisle and I look past her toward the restrooms. I could tell the sun had moved into the center of the sky telling me quite a bit of time has passed since the fight took off. I had been on the flight for three hours and we still had more ground to cover.

I push myself up to my feet smiling at the man beside me as he moves for me to get out. I bite my lip walking down the aisle toward the restroom. Fortunately for me, the restroom wasn't occupied. I quickly hop inside locking the door behind me seeing the occupied sign come through.

I quickly sit down and take a pee before standing to my feet once again. I wash my hands looking into the mirror as I quickly dry my hands. My face has just a little hint of light in it and my eyes are shining. It's the first time in months that I look almost normal. Well, as normal as I can actually get.

My eyes are still a little sunken into my face and rings cover my eyes. As soon as the nightmares leave me along I'll be able to sleep. Until then, the dark rings will just have to be a part of my face. I sigh gripping the sides of the sink. The plane moves to the left for a split second causing me to lose my balance. I quickly catch myself thankful for once that I'm not so clumsy anymore. Maybe getting older will be good for me. I can be mature and learn to be a true teenager for once. Maybe college will be a new place for me to explore. How bad can college be when I've had a vampire for a boyfriend?

Another three hours later, the plane lands in Jacksonville, Florida. The nerves return to my stomach as I look out the window. I look down at my watch to see it's just a little after two back in Washington which means it's a little after five here in Florida.

Everyone starts grabbing their things from overhead compartments. I stand to my feet stretching. By the time I get to Renee's and Phil's house, I won't want to sit down at all. The man that was sitting beside me grabs his things quickly moving around people toward the exit of the plane.

I move to the overhead compartment myself searching the bin for my own things. I find my jacket and carryon bag that I brought along with me. There were things in this bag that I just didn't trust the airport not to lose. I sigh folding my jacket over my arm and tightening my grip on my bag.

I follow behind the line of people toward the exit of the plane. Everyone is in a hurry to get off the plane. They try to push and shove people out of the way. Luckily for me, I was surrounded by the only nice people in line. They were all patient while the line moves at a snail pace.

Finally we make it to the long hallway that leads to the waiting area of the airport. A smile comes over my lips at the thought of seeing Renee. I haven't seen her since my graduation when she talked me into this whole mess. That was about three weeks ago. People run past me obviously in a hurry to meet love ones or just wanting out of the packed hallway.

I switch hands holding my bag making it to the end of the hallway. There is a huge crowd of people standing around. Obviously most of these people are waiting for their own love ones to come out of the long hallway.

I walk around, my eyes searching the crowd for anyone familiar. I search for Renee's head of hair but come up empty.

"Bella!"

My head snaps to my front hearing my mother's voice. She smiles standing in a pair of shorts, a thin blue shirt, and sandals on her feet. It's typical Renee clothing in my opinion. Phil stands behind her holding her shoulders to keep her from running toward me. That's one thing about Renee and Phil, they balance each other out.

Charlie and Renee were just so different. One wanted the secluded world of a hometown while the other wanted adventure and to see the world.

I grin quickening my pace toward her. She grins holding her arms out as I get closer. I didn't care if it made me look like a child or not. I missed my mother like crazy. I dropped my things beside us hugging her tightly. I wrapped my arms around her completely almost cutting off her circulation but she didn't complain one bit.

Phil smiles at me from behind her. Mom squeezes me back just as hard or maybe a bit harder. I suck in a huge breath the scent on her body that of a new perfume or maybe just the smell of Florida itself. It's different than the smell from Charlie around Forks. That mostly consists of the smell of dirt and air freshener from the station.

We pull back smiling at each other, "It so good to have you here, Bella."

I smile nodding, "It's good to be here, mom."

She nods and Phil walks around draping an arm on mom's shoulder, "How was your flight Bella?"

I smile nodding, "It was good."

Renee chuckles, "How bad?"

I sigh rolling my eyes, "As good to be expected when you have either a five or six year old kicking the back of your seat half the flight."

She shakes her head, "Some people just have no class."

I nod and Phil speaks up, "We should go find her luggage. With the way this place has been all day we're lucky if we even find it."

I sigh as Renee comes toward me as I pick up my things from the floor. We walk through the airport toward baggage claim. I spot my one suitcase but not my other one.

"I'm missing a suitcase."

Renee sighs and Phil shakes his head, "They've been losing people's suitcases all month. It's a disgrace."

I sigh following Renee and Phil to the baggage claim desk after we got my one suitcase. Renee smiles at the woman behind the counter, "Yes, my daughter was on the flight from Seattle to Jacksonville. She's missing a suitcase. It wasn't with her other one."

The woman sighs from the other side, "I'm so sorry, mam. We've already had three complaints about missing luggage from that flight. We are in contact with the airport in Seattle at the moment. If you can all fill out this form and we will contact you immediately when we find out more information about your missing luggage."

I groan shaking my head as Renee hands me the form. One would think they were better organized being such a grand airport. I fill out the form signing my name at the bottom and turn to Renee.

"I don't know what number to use for contact."

She nods taking the pen from my hand as I hold it out for her. She writes the house phone considering I'll be living with her for the summer before school starts in the fall. She slides the form across the counter and the woman smiles.

"We should have some information about your missing luggage in a couple of days. Someone will call your residence about the luggage."

Phil shakes his head as we all walk toward the exit/entrance of the airport. The sun is shining brightly in the sky as we look around. Renee groans turning to Phil, "Take the keys and bring the car up here. It's mad house around here. We'll never make it out of here with Bella's suitcase."

Phil nods smiling at her kissing her forehead as he takes the keys from her hand. I turn my head away from their affection. It's hard watching anyone display affection like that. I glance out the corner of my eye as I see Phil walk through close knitted taxis.

"How are you feeling, Bella?" asks Renee looking at me head one.

I shrug, "I'm okay, mom. Florida will take some getting used to now that I've been in Forks for so long."

It's hard to believe I was only in Forks for a year and a couple of months. Senior year just flew by in the blink of an eye.

She nods, "I can understand that, but you settled in Forks just fine. That was a bigger change from Arizona where you lived your entire life."

I sigh, "I know, mom. Things were just different is all I can say."

She sighs dropping the subject. I already know where the conversation was leading. Just because I seem to have moved passed the entire situation of **him** doesn't mean I'm ready to confess my heart out to her. I don't think I'll ever be ready to confess my heart to anyone. If I could confess Renee would be the best choice. Not because she's my mother but because at one time I considered her my best friend. It's not my fault or her fault my best friend flew the coop with **him**.

Suddenly a four door Sudan parks in front of us. Phil smiles at me from the driver's seat as he steps out of the car. Renee smiles at him as he walks over to us. She glances at me, "Go ahead, and get in the car, Bella. Phil can put your suitcase in the back."

I nod quickly hoping in the backseat pulling the door close behind me. I know I've upset Renee but there's not much I can do about that at the moment. She's got to realize that I'll come to her when the time is right and tell her what I can. I will never be able to tell her the whole truth about what's going on. I hope one day that I can confide in Renee again to the point where there is nothing holding us back.

I pull my seatbelt around my body as Renee climbs in the passenger seat. The car shakes as Phil places my suitcase in the trunk. I lean back in my seat hating to be sitting down again.

"Restless?" asks Renee buckling up herself.

I shrug, "I just sat in a six hour flight. My body was just getting the fluid going again."

She giggles nodding, "Well, when we get to the house you'll be able to walk around and do anything you'd like."

I smile nodding just as Phil hops in the driver seat. He smiles at Renee buckling up and starting the car. I sigh staring out the window as we leave the airport. A sudden memory flashes across my vision and I wince. The time is all too familiar of leaving the Seattle airport with Charlie. Another memory of riding in a car across states with Alice and Jasper to escape James, the tracker.

I look down at my arm seeing the mark of his teeth in my wrist. My fingers rub across the skin feeling the texture. The pain of **his** memory is all that I have left. It's the only thing that continues to tell me **he **was real **they **all were.

I drop my wrist looking back out the window. The scenery has changed again. Huge buildings are everywhere. Phil merges onto the highway and I sigh looking around. The city is a lot bigger than Forks that's for sure. This will take a lot more to get used to.

I pull my phone from my pocket suddenly remembering it in my pocket. I check the screen to find it empty of any new messages or missed calls. Charlie's probably freaking out since I haven't called him yet to tell him I made it safely.

We ride in the car for probably thirty to forty minutes before we arrive at their house. I look out the window gasping at how perfect it looks. It's different than what I expected to see Renee and Phil living in. Renee smiles at me as she turns around in her seat, "So, what do you think?"

I smile nodding, "It looks perfect. Different but perfect."

She nods, "I know. When I first saw it, I fell in love instantly. It just has that homey feeling."

I smile and the car comes to a stop. Phil cuts the engine smiling at Renee, "Here are the keys, open up the door while I get Bella's bag."

I shake my head pulling the belt off my body. Suddenly I hear waves crashing against the shore. My eyes widen as I look behind the house. I can see the ocean from behind her house. They literally have a backyard beach front.

"Surprise! I thought I'd be best for you to see it for yourself," says Renee stepping out of the car.

I turn smiling and nodding at her, "It's amazing, Mom. It's just perfect."

She nods smiling, "Just wait until you see the inside of the house."

She walks up the front porch steps toward the front door. She pulls the screen door aside jamming her key in the lock. I quickly step in behind her gasping at the view of the living room. It's more of a den really. I nod noticing the artwork and baseball memorabilia on the walls. They have couches and armchairs in the room as well. She walks through an entrance way where a small dining area sits.

She then leads me into the kitchen where a sliding glass door leads to the backyard and beach front. She leads me down a long hallway next. The last door on the right she opens revealing a huge bedroom. It's nothing special but it's a lot bigger than my old room back in Forks.

I notice a huge double bed against the wall with a dark blue comforter on top. She walks over to two sliding doors revealing a decent size closet. I spot a desk with a laptop in the corner of the room with a bookcase right next to it. A few pictures of Renee and me in Arizona sit on the bedside tables.

"I hope this will do for your time here during the summer," smiles Renee.

I nod grinning and dropping my bag to the bed along with my jacket, "It's great, mom."

She nods smiling and walking to another door in the room, "It gets better."

She waves me toward her and I do. She opens the door revealing my very own bathroom. It's quite bigger than the bathroom back in Forks that I had to share with Charlie.

I sigh in relief and Renee chuckles, "I figured you'd do that. I tried telling Charlie that sharing a bathroom with a teenager might hurt her development."

I shake my head smiling at her. The bathroom has a separate shower stall and a tub against the wall. It's definitely not the master bathroom but it's a decent size.

Suddenly footsteps come down the hallway and we can hear Phil's voice, "Where is everyone?"

Renee giggles, "Down the hall, baby."

I mentally gag at her pet name. Phil enters the bedroom holding my suitcase, "Where do you want this Bella?"

I smile pointing to the bed and he places the suitcase next to my bag and jacket.

"Hopefully the airport will get back with us soon about your other suitcase," replies Phil.

Renee sighs from behind me, "I guess we should let you unpack. Do you want any help?"

I smile shaking my head, "I think I can manage."

She nods and Phil moves to the door. Renee smiles at me but I can see the sadness in her eyes. I've upset her again by not letting her help me unpack. If I do let her help she'll never let me finish.

Phil smiles at me as he pulls the door close behind them. I sigh collapsing on the bed. This is my new life now. College starts in two months. I close my eyes letting the image come to mind of the flowers and the smell of the sun. The one day** he** finally showed me what **he** looked like in the sun. I don't let myself remember these times often but right now I want to indulge.

The way **he** was delicate not to hurt me. **He** didn't want to scare me. **He** wasn't as reserved as **he **had been in school and in Port Angeles.

I sigh pushing the thoughts back into the outer edges of my mind. Pushing myself back up I move to my suitcases. I quickly unzip the top of my suitcase checking everything inside. I moved things away searching for my photo album. I thought it was in the other suitcase. My eyes widen as I come up empty. My camera was in this suitcase but my other suitcase held my other clothing like my dress from that god awful birthday party.

All of it was missing. My other suitcase was missing. Who could want that suitcase? Would everything be inside the suitcase once the airport finds it? Will the airport even find my suitcase?

I groan kicking the bed. I grab my bag from the bed quickly unzipping the top and searching the contents. Everything was still inside. I sigh in relief. There were things I didn't want to leave back in Forks. **He **might have taken everything with him that would remind me of **him **but Forks in its entirety reminds me of **them.** Every time I think of Forks I think of the meadow and the field where **they **played baseball. Before I left I couldn't even go to Port Angeles or Seattle without thinking about **him.**

I sigh shaking my head. I need to unpack and join Renee and Phil before I got mad.

It didn't take long for me to finish unpacking. I had to put on some stretch shorts since it was so warm in the house. I walk into the living room hearing the television blaring the news station. Phil sits in a huge recliner watching the news with the remote clutched in his fingers.

I hear noise from the kitchen walking down the hallway. I peek around the corner finding Renee cooking. I smile shaking my head.

"Hey mom," I call out stepping into the room.

She turns her head smiling at me, "Hey baby. Did you finish unpacking?"

I smile nodding, "Yeah. I put most of my things in the closet while some smaller things in the dresser."

She nods, "I hope you don't mind some casserole tonight. Phil's been asking for it for a while now."

I nod, "That's fine. Can I help?"

She grins nodding, "You can chop up the tomato if you can do it and not hurt yourself."

I shake my head, "I think I can manage."

She nods pulling out the cutting board and the huge chopping knife. I quickly clean off the tomatoes under the sink and move to the counter. She smiles at me as I grab the chopping knife.I manage to cut two tomatoes without causing any self-harm. Renee shakes her head as I grin at her sticking my tongue out at her.

She quickly finishes the rest of the food and I help her set the table.

"Phil, dinner's ready!" She calls out toward the living room.

I took a seat at the table across from Renee since Phil had the head of table seat. Renee walks back into the kitchen probably to grab the picture of tea as Phil walks into the dining room.

"Sure smells good in here," remarks Phil smiling at me.

I nod, "Sure does. I'm starving."

Phil nods taking his seat, "I bet. You haven't eaten in what seven hours. If I were you I'd be ready to eat a cow."

I chuckle shrugging as Renee walks into the dining room. She places the jug of tea on the table before taking her seat. Phil quickly fills his glass full of tea while Renee starts filling her plate. After she's done I put my plate up getting some of the casserole along with some peas, potatoes, a bowl full of stew, and corn bread.

Phil fills his plate last grinning as he does so. I use the cornbread in the stew loving the taste.

"So, Bella, are you excited about the tour tomorrow?" asks Renee eating some of the casserole.

I smile nodding, "Excited and nervous, I guess."

She nods, "I believe anyone in your shoes will be nervous."

I nod eating some of the peas and casserole. Phil is busy stuffing his face so he can't comment.

"What time is the tour?" I ask taking a drink of my tea that Renee poured for me.

Renee groans turning to Phil, "Baby, I can't remember the time for that tour."

Phil swallows his food before answering, "If I'm not mistaken it's either at one thirty or two o'clock. It'll take a few hours to get there. I suggest getting up early."

Renee nods turning to me, "Tomorrow is going to be so much fun, Bella. Just us girls going to check out a college. We can even by you some new clothes for the warmer weather around here."

I smile nodding my head. In a strange way I was excited to go on a shopping trip with Renee. College was the least of my worries. I'd never been excited about shopping before but the idea of getting out there and leaving my old self behind was more than inviting. Plus, I had told Alice goodbye it was time to get rid of the thoughts centered on them and get on with my life.


	6. 4

4.

The next morning, sun beams into my bedroom window. Living in Forks for the past year and a half has made me forget what it feels like to waken by something other than rain. My eyes immediately open from the bright light shinning through my eyes. I yawn looking around confused as to where I am. My eyes immediately pick up the photo sitting on top of the dresser.

Mom and I are standing beside each other in Arizona with the sun beaming down at us in the photo. It's one of the few photos I didn't take with me to Forks. It's hard to believe how happy I look in that photo. I hadn't met **him **at the time of that photo. I was completely unaware of how much my life was going to change.

I sigh shaking my head and sitting up in bed. My eyes find the digital clock sitting on the bedside table.

**_10:16am_**

I groan shaking my head tossing the covers off my body. I rub my eyes trying to get the sleep crusts from the corner of my eyes. I quickly stand to my feet walking over to the window. I can hear laughter outside and I push the curtains aside staring out the window after pulling up the blinds.

I can barely see the neighbors but the apparent kid's laughter floats on the wind. I smile attempting to be happy at the sounds of happiness. Suddenly sounds of footsteps register to my ears as a knock follows the steps.

"Bella? Are you up, honey?"

I sigh dropping the curtain from my fingers, "Yeah, mom. I'm up."

The handle on the door turns opening to reveal Renee in a short gray robe tied around her body. Her feet are bare and she's holding a mug of coffee in her hands. She smiles at me, "Good to see you're awake. I was afraid I'd have to wake you myself. You should find something to eat. We have to get going in about an hour and half."

I sigh nodding crossing my arms over my chest, "Sure thing, mom. Where's Phil?"

She sighs smiling, "Oh, he went to the batting cages for a couple of hours. There are a few guys he hangs with in the mornings. He has to keep in shape so he goes out in the mornings to run and to the batting cages."

I nod, "Right, I'll come find something to eat after I get dressed."

She sighs nodding, "Alright. I'll be in the kitchen if you need me."

I smile watching as she pulls the door closed behind her. I glance out the window again before sighing and shaking my head. I quickly move across the room pulling open drawers on the dresser searching for something suitable to wear to a tour of a college. I already know I'm attending the college since my application was accepted. Renee was overjoyed when I first received the news back in Forks.

That was the thing about moving here to begin with. I had to apply to colleges in Jacksonville before I considered it an option. I applied to two different colleges in the Jacksonville area but I was only accepted to one. I told Charlie first and then Renee. She wasted no time finding the college and setting everything up for when I arrived.

If it wasn't for Renee, I wouldn't even be attending college in Florida. To be perfectly honest, if Renee hadn't invited me to Florida, I would have gone to college in Washington. I wouldn't have left the state for anyone or anything.

I shake my head again in a dangerous attempt to clear my crowded mind. My fingers feel of the fabric of shirt after shirt in the drawer before coming up empty. I shut the drawer back in frustration my fingers moving to my hair. I grip the strands in my fingers about to pull my hair from my scalp.

I open my eyes suddenly spotting a shirt hanging from my suitcase that I must have forgotten about. I walk toward the suitcase pushing the top off and finding a yellow collar shirt sitting in the suitcase. I honestly don't remember this shirt from anywhere. I don't remember buying it or ever wearing it anywhere.

I sigh shrugging chalking it up to my failing human memory. I toss the shirt to the bed moving back to the dresser finding a pair of blue jean shorts that will help in the heat. Pants in Florida heat will not work whatsoever. I smile moving back to the clothes after finding some decent undergarments. I grab the clothes from the bed moving toward the bathroom.

I step out of the bathroom, my hair finally dry and my body squeaky clean. I smile in the mirror on top of my dresser. I walk across the floor toward the dresser finding a rubber band for my hair. I quickly decide against putting my hair up and instead grab the headband to keep my hair out of my eyes.

Footsteps come down the hallway and my door suddenly opens. I reach down in a drawer grabbing a decent belt pulling it through the loops on my shorts. I look up to see Renee smiling at me shaking her head.

"You need to eat something. You won't be able to eat until after the tour. If I'm not mistaken they are going to let us eat in their cafeteria."

I nod smiling, "I'll be in the kitchen in a few, mom."

She sighs nodding and stepping out into the hallway. She stops sighing and turning around on her heel, "I'm glad you're here, Bella. I'll be here whenever you want to talk, about anything."

I smile nodding watching her shake her head walking down the hallway. I shake my head the smile instantly falling from my face. She just doesn't understand what I'm going through. No one understands what I'm going through in all honesty.

I shake my head walking toward my closet. My eyes locate a pair of yellow flats in the floor and I quickly grab them pulling them on my feet. I quickly move around the room finding a purse to which I stuff in my MP3 player I received from Jacob for graduation. I find my phone; one that Charlie bought me for graduation, dropping it inside my purse.

I push a comb inside as well before grabbing my camera and stepping out of my room. I can hear the TV in the living room going telling me that Renee has given up on talking to me in the kitchen. I walk in the kitchen seeing everything the same as last night except for the now empty sink.

Renee must have cleaned them this morning before I woke. Or she must have gotten tired on waiting for me this morning and decided to clean them before I showered.

I sigh moving toward the fridge and the cabinets. I find a box of pop-tarts and a box of blueberry "Ego" waffles. I shrug my shoulders placing box boxes on the counter and finding the box of sausage.

"Ever the one to cook yourself something."

I jump from the sound of Renee's voice turning around and glaring at her, "Mom, are you trying to give me a heart attack?"

She smiles sheepishly, "I thought you heard me coming in. I should have known you were too preoccupied with your own thoughts to hear me walking into the kitchen."

I sigh, "I'm just a little nervous about the tour, is all, mom."

She nods taking a seat at the counter/bar. I grab a couple pieces of sausage from the box placing them on the skillet and turning on the burner.

Renee sits at the counter in perfect silence just watching me as I work. I can tell she's about to blow a gasket with questions she has for me. I didn't talk to Charlie about anything before I left, what makes her think I'll talk to her. Oh, that's right; she used to be my best friend. I used to could tell her everything about my life. I would tell her about my latest crush on some boy and she would give me her honest opinion.

I sigh finishing the sausage and putting the waffles in the toaster along with the pop-tarts. Renee suddenly jumps from her seat moving toward the cabinets handing me a plate. I smile thankful toward her taking the plate from her hand and placing the two pieces of sausage on the plate. The toaster suddenly pops up and I quickly grab the waffles and pop-tarts.

Renee suddenly places the container of syrup on the counter as I place my plate down. I move toward the cabinet but Renee pushes me toward the counter, "Eat up, Bella. I can get your drink. Orange juice?"

I sigh nodding, "Thanks."

She rolls her eyes, "I'm your mom, Bella. That's what I'm for."

I collapse on the stool grabbing the syrup and drowning my waffles. I take a bite from a pop-tart smiling at mom as she places a glass of orange juice down beside my plate along with a fork on my plate. I smile at her grabbing my fork eating the sausage and waffles.

"So, the college is here in Jacksonville, of course. We need to get there at least an hour before the tour begins to find a place to park and everything. I'm just so excited about you attending college so close to me. It's like a dream come true."

I smile at her but on the inside I'm screaming bloody murder. College here did look promising but the longer I'm here the more I become uneasy. I've only been here a little over twelve hours and I'm already missing Forks with all my heart.

We sit in silence as I finish eating my breakfast. I can barely remember a time when we weren't talking together before I moved to Forks. Everything is tainted with **his **memory and nothing will ever be the same. All I can do is try for my mother's sake. It's not like I'll ever see **them **again anyway.

I grab my glass of orange juice taking a gulp so that I don't have to reply back. Renee is one of those types of people that will keep talking even if you don't reply back.

She grins, "I just hope that you can make some new friends. Charlie told me about Angela and how close you were to her and everything."

I smile nodding placing the glass back on the table, "Yeah, Angie was great. She and Ben were going off to California for college. Lauren went off to New York. She was apparently contacted by some model agency."

Renee smiles widely, "That sounds fantastic. What about Jacob, how was he?"

If I didn't know any better I'd say both Renee and Charlie wanted me to hook up with Jacob. Every time they mention his name, their eyes light up like a child on Christmas morning.

I shrug grabbing my fork, "He's okay, I guess. I don't talk to him much lately. He lives on the reservation and I don't get to see him too much."

Her eyes dimmer and I quickly shuffle food into my mouth. She notices the food turning her head toward the wall clock. She sighs turning back to me, "Hurry up, Bella. We need to get moving."

I nod my head quickly finishing my food by shuffling everything I can into my mouth. I stand to my feet grabbing everything from the counter-top and placing it in the sink to wash. I can hear Renee in the living room now causing me to shake my head. I can already tell that this wasn't the wisest decision to move here for college.

I suppose the only reason to accepted this offer was the idea of being alone at college was highly appealing. I could live at college without Renee or Charlie's constant worried gazes. Obviously, I didn't think about the time before I moved to college with Renee watching my every move. I could lie to myself to come extent and possibly get away with almost murder with Renee but I can't hide the fact that I'm distant with everyone now. Renee can see through everything I do because that's how close we used to be. Now, things are completely different that I can't even bare to think about the way I'm acting now.

I sigh shaking my head in an attempt to dispel the horrid thoughts from my mind. I walk toward the counter grabbing my purse from the top and walking into the living room. I nervously flatten down my top fidgeting my fingers through my long brown hair.

"I'm ready to go, mom."

Renee turns around smiling at me and nodding, "Alright, well, let's get in the car. It'll will probably take about an hour to get there will Florida traffic at lunch time."

I smile nodding and walking toward the front door. Renee is grabbing her bag from the end table beside the couch. She rummages through her bag probably for the keys when her eyebrows wrinkle in confusion.

She pulls her keys from the purse suddenly tossing in the air toward me. Instinctively I reach up catching them in my hand.

"Go ahead to the car, Bella. I need to grab my phone and the direction print outs from the bedroom. I'll be out shortly."

I sigh nodding as she walks from the room down the hall without sparing me a glance. I shrug my shoulders pushing out the front door stepping outside. The heat immediately hits my arm causing me to mentally groan from the lack of humidity. I let the front door close hitting the wall walking down the front porch steps toward the car.

I look down at the key chain hitting the button unlocking the doors. I walk around to the passenger seat suddenly feeling eyes on my skin. I look up turning my head everywhere in an attempt to find who or what is staring at me. A shiver runs down my back as I close my eyes breathing slowly trying to lower my pulse. I shake my head grabbing the handle to the passenger seat and opening my eyes.

I pull the door open and quickly hop inside shutting the door behind me. The feel of the eyes on me is stronger now but I shrug it off. I drop my bag toward the floorboard and grab the seat-belt pulling it over my body. I glance up toward the front door of the house not seeing Renee anywhere.

I sigh leaning against the seat and fingering the keys in my hands. I sit up placing the key in the ignition behind the steering wheel. I leaning back against the seat once again closing my eyes this time and letting my body relax.

The darkness behind my eyelids has never been a great thing. Things plague my mind. Victoria is the biggest thing the plague's my mind the worst. I know she'll come for me or **him **one day. I don't like the idea of her finding **him **and killing him for what he did to protect me.

An image of Victoria that day in the woods at the baseball place still haunts me. The look in her eyes and how she would do anything she wanted for him. It doesn't surprise me that she would do anything to help her mate, James. Sometimes I wished James had killed me at the ballet studio so that I wouldn't have to deal with the horrible pain I go through since **their **departure.

Suddenly the driver's side door opens the ding rings out in the SUV. I quickly open my eyes scared at how could be coming in. I don't recall hearing Renee at the front door of the house.

I spot Renee hoping inside the car smiling sadly at me, "Sorry, Bella. I had the hardest time finding the direction printouts. I had to call Phil to find out where they were. It was just a mess. Well, we can get started on our journey now, I suppose."

Renee closes the driver side door and placing her bags in the backseat floorboard smiling at me. She places a couple sheets of typing paper down on the dash as she pulls her seatbelt on her body.

"I'm sure you'll just love the campus, honey. Phil stopped by there just last week just to look around. I made the plans over the phone so I haven't been to the campus just yet either. Phil said it looks great. The part of the campus for community college courses is smaller."

I smile nodding, "Sounds great."

She turns the key in the ignition starting the car and pulling out of the driveway.

I sigh staring out the window as Renee takes the nearest exit. Being in a car with Renee for an hour and a half isn't the easiest thing when I don't feel like talking. Renee has become one of those moms that try to force you to talk. She never used to have to do that because I was always open with her. She was the one person I could talk to about anything and now that has been taken from us completely.

Renee starts talking at the mouth once again and since the beginning of the ride I've been ignoring her for the most part. Nerves have already settled into my body and I can only imagine how things will be at the college itself.

Renee stops at a red light a couple blocks away from the college.

"Are you excited, Bella?"

I sigh my mind coming down from the clouds shrugging my shoulders, "A little bit, I guess. Mostly just nervous. I don't know what to expect. Everyone's going to think I'm strange with my pale skin."

Renee tisks at me as she hits the gas when the light turns green, "Bella, don't talk like that. You lived in Arizona with me for years and not once thought too much about what people thought about you."

I shrug my shoulders silence enveloping the entire car. Renee hits the blinker on the SUV waiting in the turning lane as everyone keeps going. There's finally a break in the traffic and Renee takes it pulling into the huge parking lot of the college. I sigh as my eyes locate the huge blue sign saying "FLORIDA STATE COLLEGE at Jacksonville."

I lower my eyes downward as Renee grins giggling, "This is so exciting, Bella. Like I said don't be dissuaded by the whole "State College" situation. Phil and I made sure that they have plenty of courses for community college. I'm sure they'll have something that will perk your interest."

I nod raising my head to glance out the window. The outside is huge with just a few people walking around here and there. Renee finds a decent parking place close to the front of the building and cuts the engine. She turns her head toward me as she pulls the keys from the ignition.

"Here we go, Bella. I sure hope you like it here. Phil says it looks great."

I smile nodding, pulling the seat-belt off, and grabbing my bag from the floorboard. Renee grabs her bags from the back floorboard smiling at me as she pushes the driver side door open and stepping out. I sigh rolling my eyes as I hear Renee squeal. What's up with her completely different attitude?

I shake my head pushing the door open and stepping out. The heat hits my skin again and thankfully I don't feel the same eyes on me. I feels other eyes on me but nothing too bizarre. I pull my purse up my arm shutting the door behind me. I walk around the car toward Renee who's now standing on the sidewalk.

She grins at me, "It looks terrific, right?"

I smile nodding, "It looks pretty big, mom. I haven't seen the whole campus yet. I can't make an affirm decision just yet."

She sighs nodding, "Alright then. Let's go inside. If I'm correct they should have a meeting in the auditorium to meet for the tour."

I smile nodding as she turns toward the huge seat of double doors with the staircases. I follow behind Renee up the stairs as she pulls the door open and holds it out for me. I graciously move inside as Renee lets the door go before looking around. Her eyes are wide as she looks around taking everything in.

My eyes move around taking in the huge ceiling. The entire building is huge with a huge light hanging from the ceiling. Renee grins widely looking around and spotting a huge sign sitting on the floor.

I walk toward Renee as she stands in front of the sign reading the words.

**_"College Tour Group meets in auditorium at 1:30 p.m._**

**_School Tour begins at 2:00 p.m."_**

Renee looks back at me smiling, "Let's find the auditorium."

I smile nodding as we locate some arrows that show the way to the auditorium. Renee pulls on my arm as we find the auditorium. She smiles at me suddenly handing me her bag causing a confused stare on my face. She giggles, "Don't worry, Bella. I just saw a restroom not far back and I have to go. I'll be back in just a few minutes, I promise."

I sigh nodding my head, "Go ahead, mom. I'll find us some seats."

She grins nodding, "Sure. I'll be back, Bella."

I smile watching her walk off toward the direction we came. I shake my head turning around to the huge open doors of the auditorium. I pull Renee's bag over my shoulder walking toward the open doors of the auditorium. I sigh noticing a girl in a dark blue tank top and light blue skirt standing at the entrance of the auditorium.

I sigh sucking in a deep breath walking toward the girl. Her eyes move toward me and I take a good decent look at her.

She has a name-tag on her shirt saying, "Hello, My name is Natasha."

I sigh smiling at her, "Hello. I'm here for the tour."

She smiles pushing some of her black hair over her shoulder looking down at the clipboard in her hands, "Name please?"

I smile, "Isabella Swan."

She rakes a manicured nail down the clipboard tapping and nodding her head, "Here it is right here. Is there anyone with you today?"

I smile nodding, "Yes, my mother. She just went to the restroom and will be back shortly."

The girl smiles raising her head and grinning at me, "It's nice to meet you, Isabella. Please go inside and find a seat. There'll be a short introduction with the dean and then we'll get started with the tour. Take this name tag and put your name on it please. I hope to see you soon."

I smile nodding and taking the name-tag from her outstretched hand. I walk deeper into the auditorium noticing quite a few people already sitting around. I spot a decent spot to sit directly in the middle but knowing Renee, she'll move us closer to the front to hear the speaker.

I sigh collapsing in a seat and placing Renee's bag in the seat next to me. I quickly rummage through my bag searching for a pen or marker and find a black permanent marker to use. I find the name-tag quickly scrawling the short version of my name.

**Bella (**_Hello, My Name is _**Bella)**

I quickly flatten out the sticky tag on my shirt hoping that it doesn't look out of place. I lean back on my seat looking around. The auditorium is huge with the ceiling so far away from the ground. I close my eyes listening to the sounds around me.

After about two minutes, I hear Renee's voice, "Bella? Where are you?"

I sit up turning my head and waving toward her confused face. Her eyes light up walking toward me, "Why are you so far back, Bella? If you want to hear we should be closer to the front."

I sigh rolling my eyes, "Everyone will be crowded around the front, mom. I thought being back here would be less crowded."

She sighs moving in front of me to the seat next to me grabbing her bag. She holds up a name-tag smiling at me, "The girl gave it to me. I have to put my name and your mom on it so they know I'm here with you. She seemed nice."

I sigh shaking my head, "She has to mom. In these types of things, you have to be nice. It shows the parents they are making a good choice in sending their child to this school. By the time school starts in August, she'll be the partier or the slut screwing multiple guys in her dorm after hours."

Renee looks up startled by my exclaim. Thankfully her rebuttal is refused as we hear a male's voice from the front of the room.

"Good Afternoon, Future students and parents."

A man with gray hair and dressed in a yellow short sleeve shirt with a pair of khaki pants. He looks like he's around 54 as he climbs up the steps. He walks over to the microphone attached to a huge wooden platform.

"Hello, students. I am Michael D. Reynolds. I am the dean of the mathematics program here at Florida State College in the wonderful city of Jacksonville, Florida. Today we are going to have a tour of the campus. Members of the student council will show you around to everything so that you don't get lost when you do attend in the summer or the fall. I hope to see some of your faces in my department so that we can find some common ground here at this fine establishment. Some girls will be coming up here to give names for their group. Parents will be able to join as well. I look forward to seeing all of you and greeting your family at the beginning of the semester. Thank you and good day."

Everyone claps as he walks down the steps. A girl with platinum blonde hair dressed in a light brown sweater top with a light pink top over the sweater along with a pair of jean shorts walk up the steps. She smiles at everyone as she steps up the podium.

"Hello everyone, My name is Mary. I'm the student body president here at Florida State College in Jacksonville. If everyone in my group could please get your things and meet me at the double doors. Thanks."

She reads off a group of names consisting of about six people. Thankfully, my name isn't on her list. Two more girls go to the front and I'm not on their list either. It's the last girl, Natasha that walks to the front that I know will be my tour guide. She's the only person left to about five people.

"Hello as you all know my name is Natasha. The remaining people please meet me at the double doors. We will start the tour as soon as possible."

Natasha walks down from the podium smiling at the dean. I turn toward Renee who's grinning fondly at me, "Ready?"

I shrug, "As ready as I'll ever be, I guess."

She sighs standing to her feet and grabbing her bags. I quickly stand to my feet pulling my bag up my shoulder and following Renee back toward the double doors. There is a small group of people at the door.

Two girls that look like twin sisters are standing together huddled up talking quietly to themselves. A boy is standing with his parents rolling his eyes as his mother tries straightening his shirt. Another young girl that looks too young to be on this tour is standing quietly next to her father who's fingers are moving around a cell phone as if his life depends on what he's typing.

Renee and I stand quietly as I notice the name-tags on all the people.

The twin girls are Kayla and Layla. The boy who's talking heatedly with his parents is Bradley. The young girl who's now pulling on her father's jacket sleeve is Janie.

Renee tugs on my bag and I look toward her face. I can see she wants to ask something but I notice her eyes moving toward the boy arguing with his parents. I quickly avert my eyes away from her as Natasha joins us.

She smiles at us all pulling her arm up, "I'm glad to see all these great faces. I'm Natasha. I attend this school for its normal degree platforms. I started this college about two years ago. Becoming part of the student council isn't easy but I manage somewhat. I'm going to hand out these brochures to everyone so that everyone knows where we are in the school."

She quickly hands out paper flap things around to everyone. Renee and I each got one separate to look through. The entire brochure shows pictures and facts about the college.

"Everyone should stay close to me throughout the tour. There are a few students around campus that we will come around a few times. Please keep up because it is easy to get lost and confused through these corridors."

We walk out of the auditorium toward the outside. Natasha smiles at another girl handing her the stack of brochures and she scatters off back wherever she came from.

Natasha smiles at the group walking backward facing us, "Florida State College at Jacksonville is a state college in Jacksonville, Florida, U.S., and part of the Florida College System. It is one of several institutions in the Florida College System designated a "state college", as it offers a greater number of four-year bachelor's degrees than traditional two-year community colleges.

"This school was founded in 1966 as Florida Junior College. It was known as Florida Community College at Jacksonville from 1986–2009, at which point it took its current name to reflect its changed focus. The college has four major physical campuses and several additional centers located around the First Coast region, and currently enrolls 81,370 students, making it the second largest institution of higher education in Florida."

I sigh nodding my head looking around us as she leads us into the huge open quad part of the college.

Natasha smiles turning around and continuing to talk, "The institution was founded in 1965 as Florida Junior College. With the growth of the community college movement it was renamed Florida Community College at Jacksonville in 1986. In the early 21st century, in recognition of a shortage of four-year colleges in the state the Florida Legislature passed legislation enabling some community colleges to become "state colleges", meaning they can offer more bachelor's degrees than traditional community colleges, but no graduate degree programs. FCCJ was one of the first community colleges to make the change, and in 2009 announced a name change to "Florida State College at Jacksonville".

Renee grins as I glance over at her, "She sure knows her stuff, doesn't she."

I grin nodding my head, "Seems someone's memorized the main part of the college information manual."

Renee smiles shaking her head as we continue with the tour. I can already imagine how things might go at this college. I'll probably be dorm mated with some blonde bombshell that sleeps with half the college. I just hope things go better here than at the last place.

Hopefully, everyone will get the message that I'm not the type to talk with and leave me be. Lord knows I don't need another boy caught on my coat tail. Especially since I'm not over **him**.


	7. 5

5.

Summer vacation with Renee had gone by so fast. The smell and feel of the ocean was my comfort. Forks wasn't like this at all. That's why **they **lived there before. In just a couple weeks, I will be trading my room at Renee's for a dorm room.

I sit on my bed just writing in a journal. I suppose I don't want to forget these days here at Renee's house. The pen moves along the page writing the words at the forefront of my mind. I don't want to forget **them **either which doesn't seem right. They all left me in Forks to rot as a pathetic human. If Renee or anyone gets ahold of this journal, who knows what they'll do to me.

Suddenly running footsteps come down the hallway, stopping right outside my bedroom door. I quickly close the journal stuffing it underneath my pillow. The door comes open revealing Renee standing at the door grinning at my face.

"The airport finally called, Bella. Your suitcase was found in Portland for some strange reason. Do you want to go with us to get it?"

I sigh looking around my room. I had finally said goodbye to all those things in that particular suitcase. There were things in that suitcase that I missed but after the first week went by with no word, I was confident that I would never see that piece of luggage again.

I force a smile on my face nodding my head, "Sure, mom. I'll go."

She smiles at me before disappearing back toward the living or kitchen.

In all actuality, I'm not in the mood to even leave my bed. I haven't brushed my hair or teeth all day. It's been one of those particular days when I severely miss Forks. I haven't mentioned this to Renee at all because I don't want to upset her. I can't help it that I miss the morning drizzle or the cool days instead of the blistering heat of Florida.

I silently slip my feet into a pair of plain black converse before grabbing my black shades from the dresser. I walk out of the room down the hallway hearing some game on the television. For an instance, I'm transported back to Forks in Charlie's house. I can practically hear the creaking of the chair he sits in as he watches the football game after work.

I step into the kitchen seeing both Renee and Phil standing side by side. Part of me wants to detour toward the front door and wait for Renee there as I don't want to see their PDA, but another part of me just stands there watching them missing that feeling of another person beside your for the rest of your life. Renee is so lucky to have found that twice in one lifetime.

"Mom? Are you ready to go?"

Renee and Phil both jump from my proximity. A small smile spreads across my face at their shocked faces as I cross my arms, "If you two are going to stand there and kiss face the entire time, I'm just going ahead to the car myself. I just might decide to leave you both and go by myself."

Renee chuckles, "How exactly are you going to do that when I have the keys?"

I smirk shaking my head, "Unfortunately, mom, Phil always leaves his keys dangling from the key rack here in the kitchen."

Her eyes immediately move toward the rack beside me to see the set of keys hanging from the rack. She turns her head toward Phil hitting him in the stomach causing him to groan from the obvious displeasure, "Sorry, honey. It's a force of habit."

She rolls her eyes smiling and grabbing her bag from the counter, "We'll be back shortly, dear. Hopefully, the airport will have her suitcase in a place they can find it quickly."

Phil nods grabbing an apple from the fruit basket on the counter, "You two take as long as you need. I believe Steve is coming over for beers. He's insisting that I accompany him to the batting cages and bar for a couple of hours."

Renee sighs, "Just be careful. Last time didn't work out so well. Steve is one horrible drunk."

Phil nods his head, "I know, honey. I'm only going to be there for two hours max and as soon as you get home, you'll call me. I'll be back home before you know it."

Renee nods pulling her purse over her shoulder and grabbing her keys from the counter along with her own shades. She reaches up placing a kissing on his cheek before walking toward me at the entrance of the kitchen. We both walk toward the front door and out toward the SUV.

I quickly climb into the passenger seat as Renee places the key in the ignition. She smiles waving toward the front door as Phil waves back at us. She quickly changes gears backing out of the driveway.

I stare out the window getting ready for another awkward car ride.

By the time we finally make it to the airport, I'm ready to clobber my mother. If she asks me one more time on trying to mingle with Phil's teammates sons, I think I'm going to dig a hole in the back yard and bury myself.

Renee finds a decent place to park that she won't get a ticket for and cuts the engine. She smiles at me and my hand instinctively reaches out toward the handle on the door before she can speak. I pull the handle toward me pushing the door open and stepping out into the hot Florida air.

Renee walks around the SUV motioning for me to follow her toward the main building. I sigh folding my arms across my chest walking directly behind her. I refuse to walk beside her. They believe just because it's been a year since **he **left, I'm ready mingle again. The boys she tries to hook me up with are never the right type of guy. I don't want some sport's nut going all goo-goo when I haven't heard of some particular team.

There are taxi's lined up around the front of the airport. As usual, the airport is bustling with people moving in and out of the automated doors. Renee glances over her shoulder at me smiling as we step inside the building. The smell from the food stands fills my nostrils causing me to stick my nose up at the foreign smells.

Renee slows down allowing me to catch up with against my better judgment. I keep my face firmly in front of me without sparing her a glance as we make our way toward the customer service booth. There is a couple already in line talking to a woman about their missing luggage. These airports around here lose people's baggage all the time, it's so sickening.

Finally, they finish and Renee steps up to the woman, "Yes, I was called about a piece of luggage found for my daughter."

The woman smiles moving toward the computer, "Name, please."

"Isabella Marie Swan."

I lean against the counter with my back facing the open airport listening to the taping of computer keys. She sighs searching the lists of names, "Here we go. One piece of luggage was located in Portland and shipped here this morning. You'll have to go over to baggage claim to retrieve the luggage. Here is a ticket to retrieve that luggage so they know you aren't stealing it by any means."

The woman pulls out a book of yellow ticket tearing one form the book. She writes down some stuff on the front before handing it to us, "have a good day. If you they give you trouble just tell them to call customer service."

Renee smiles clutching the ticket it her hand as we move from the customer service. We search the airport finding baggage claim five minutes later. There is a bunch of people lined up at the customer service for baggage. Renee stands at the end smiling at me causing me to avert my eyes, "Bella, talk to me."

I roll my eyes, "Mom, we are in the middle of an airport. Not now."

She sighs turning her head away from me. We stand there for a good ten to fifteen minutes as the line slowly creeps up. She hands the ticket to the balding man behind the counter.

"It says here you are here to retrieve a piece of luggage that was accidentally sent to Portland, OR for an Isabella? Is that correct?"

Renee smiles nodding her head, "Yes, that would be correct."

The man sighs nodding moving toward the computer typing in the information.

"Ah, here it is. It seems it's in the back. I'll call Henry our luggage man; he'll get it out here very shortly."

The balding man, with the nametag of Jeff, grabs the walkie-talkie beside him.

"Henry, over at baggage."

There is static before we hear wind and a voice, _"Yeah, Jeff. What's up?"_

Jeff sighs, "We've got a piece of luggage that needs to be picked up from the back. Only you and Mal have the key. I don't have one today."

There is static again before the voice comes in, _"Okay, man. What's the name tag?"_

"Isabella Marie Swan."

_"I got it man. I'll be up there soon."_

Jeff smiles at us turning off the walkie-talkie, "He'll be here shortly. There doesn't seem to be many bags back there. Especially in the I's."

We nod leaning against the counter as he pulls out another ticket. He fills out the ticket, "The owner of the luggage needs to sign this and if she's younger than eighteen and adult needs to sign beside her."

Renee takes the ticket signing on the adult line before sliding it over to me. I quickly sign my name hating my penmanship. Renee smiles handing it over, "Do you know if the luggage has been opened or tampered with by any chance?"

Jeff sighs overlooking the ticket shaking his head, "I'm afraid not, mam. We can check it once it gets up here."

Renee sighs nodding and she's quiet once again. The door behind Jeff suddenly comes open and a younger black man steps in. He's holding my huge bag in front of him smiling.

"Baggage for Isabella Swan."

Jeff sighs taking the bag from the man, "Thanks Henry. You can get back to uploading the next flight."

Henry rolls his eyes before waving toward us and walking out the door. In my opinion, Jeff sounds like a real stick in the mud or a pain in the ass. He seems like one of those co-workers with a pole jammed up his ass.

The image of him bent over with the end of a stick protruding from his ass is funny. Almost funny enough to cause a giggle, but not quite.

Jeff looks it over checking the tag that's been placed on it before sighing and cursing under his breath, "It looks as if it has been tampered with. The red tag around the zipper is to keep someone from opening it again. If there is anything a value missing from it, please read the fine print in these baggage claim guidelines."

He places the bag on the counter and Renee helps me grab it to the floor. She smiles at him, but I can seem something hidden within her irises, "If she's missing something of value, I have to take it up with the management?"

Jeff sighs, standing to his feet, "Look lady, I'm not trying to be disrespectful, but that's pretty much what I'm saying. I have been told by my superiors that if someone is missing something valuable, send those to the managers office or to save time have them read the fine print."

Renee's lips tighten before she grabs her bag from the counter smiling as she does so, "Very well. We will just take the bag and leave. Come on, Bella."

I smirk toward Jeff as Renee walks off, "You're lucky, Jeff. If I weren't here, she'd have done damage or maybe sent my stepfather to do it."

I wave toward him pulling the bag behind me. Renee's fingers tighten around the strap of her bag, "These airports really tick me off. I can't believe that man. They should certainly fire him. He was being a completely a-"

She breaks off noticing me, "You don't have anything of value in there, right?"

I sigh shaking my head, "No, mom. I put other clothes in here. A few shoes and a couple of pictures. Nothing else of too much value."

She sighs, turning back toward the front automated doors, "Good. I refuse to come back up here without Phil. He wouldn't have pulled that with him around."

I smile nodding listening to her bicker about Jeff. These are the things I'm going to miss about Renee at college. Then again, maybe I won't miss them that much; she'll have me home constantly anyway.

I sigh, feeling the heat on my skin as we walk through the parking lot back toward the SUV.

As soon as we get in the house, I scatter toward my bedroom. Renee sighs shaking her head as I skit toward my room. I roll the bag into the room kicking the door closed and turning the lock on the back of the knob. The smell of the ocean fills my room bringing a groan from my mouth.

I miss the mossy smell of the trees around Forks. I glance back toward my bag shrugging my shoulders and pulling it up on the bed with me. I locate a pair of scissors cutting the red tag around the zippers.

I wonder who would go through the trouble of misplacing my bag. It seems it was on purpose or something. I sigh release a strangle breath before grabbing the zipper and pulling the top back.

I close my eyes for a brief second summoning any last courage before opening my eyes once again. The inside looks mostly the same except for the fact that my clothes have been moved around. My shirts are more wrinkled than they were before. The one pair of boots that I placed in this suitcase are scattered around in a mess.

I groan noticing that whoever tampered with my suitcase doesn't believe in tidiness. I grab the boots dropping them toward the floor and the clothes toward the bed knowing I'll need to put them in another suitcase for college in two weeks.

My head tilts to the side as I notice a picture from one of my last days in Forks is missing. I remember placing it at the bottom of my suitcase as I didn't want anyone to find it. I managed to find a lovely waterfall in Forks and Angela along with Ben we found it a nestled with the greens and the forest life. It was the best picture I had of Forks and it was now missing. It had more sentimental value than any other picture I had before.

The picture that's missing only contained me in the photo on one of my better days. I still have the one with me in the middle while Angela and Ben are on each side of me. My eyes move around the bottom of my suitcase catching something reflecting from the sunlight.

My eyes widen seeing simple charm bracelet. Tears fill my eyes as my hands reach toward it grabbing it from the bottom. My lips curve upward at the simple clear crystal shaped in a heart as a charm. My fingers move around the band noticing another charm. I turn it over my hands covering my mouth as a gasp comes out.

_Happy Birthday_

The tears come out even harder now. The only person that would even try to interfere with my life would be Alice. What had she seen concerning me? It has to be something big that would force her hand. **He **would never have allowed this to happen. She couldn't interfere in my life at all.

I drop the bracelet toward the bed wiping my tears. Maybe Alice can see this right now. Maybe she's seeing my tears at the gift. Alice would be the only one that would even tempt to send me anything for my birthday. It's strange considering my birthday isn't for two months.

I pull my bottom lip between my teeth contemplating what this could mean. There must be something concerning my birthday. My eyes widen at the only idea Alice might find. Maybe after my birthday I disappear from her visions. That would be the only thing that would force Alice's hand. She'd never betray **him **unless it was life threatening.

I shake my head pushing myself from my bed. The only other question, why would she take my picture? Unless, and this is the one I refuse to think about, she's seen me having a better life without them. Maybe I have the best human life anyone can ever have and I completely forget about **them**. Maybe this is her way of telling me goodbye and to have a nice safe life away from them.

Alice is never easy to understand or comprehend. She's cryptic in the only way she can be. Her visions aren't certain and maybe there's something to them. She knows they aren't set in stone and if something changes the entire vision changes. If by some chance, she saw me having a normal safe human life that might not happen now. She intervened by getting my luggage and taking my picture along with giving me this bracelet.

I sigh turning around toward my dresser. I want to scream because this makes no sense. Why would Alice do this? Has she seen something? Of course, Alice has seen something. The only clue I have to what she's seen in my birthday. Something happens around my birthday.

I march back toward my bed cursing Alice under my breath.

"Alice, I sure hope you know what you're doing."

I grab the bracelet smiling as I wrap it around my wrist smiling as it fits. Hopefully, she'll see me wearing this on my birthday and everything will be alright. I can only hope.

The days past by quickly, but the idea that Alice was watching me put me on edge. I was constantly overdoing things. If I were doing the dishes, I felt as if there were eyes on me. I was nervous and shy around new people Phil would bring over.

His teammates were nice, I guess if Renee hadn't tried setting me up with their son's that is. The entire last two weeks spent at Renee's were frustrating. Renee hardly ever let me out of her sight even though I had spent most of the summer around her. She wouldn't have any of it. I was horribly annoying that she wouldn't let me out of her sight.

I was sitting on the couch in the living room while Phil and Renee watched some show they seemed to really love. I believe it was Criminal Minds but I can't be too sure. I was mostly zoned out while watching it.

Renee sighs from beside me on the couch, "Nervous, Bella?"

I jumped having been away in my own head turning toward her. She sighs, "About tomorrow?"

I shrug my shoulders. Tonight was my last night here at Renee's house. Phil had taken off from practice and was accompanying me and Renee to the campus. Renee didn't seem to like the idea of me staying on campus but I had convinced her it would be easier. I still haven't come up with a major just yet. Nothing really stuck out to me in the respect.

"A little bit," I confessed just to get her off my back about it.

She frowns, "Maybe it's not such a good idea for you to stay on campus."

Phil chuckles from his chair shaking his head, "Renee, I think Bella wants to stay on campus. You've been doing nothing but suffocating her the entire last two weeks. She wants some breathing room, honey."

Renee's frown only deepens before she turns toward me, "Is that what you want, Bella?

I sigh smiling, "Yeah, mom, it is. I mean I'm almost an adult and I want to be on my own a little while. I hope you understand."

She sighs the corner of her lips curving up, "I understand. It's just that you're my child. I'm always going to think of you as my little girl. The same girl that needed me to tell her how good she was at ballet."

I smile rolling my eyes, "I know, mom. Just do me a favor and don't mention that ever at my school, alright?"

She giggles nodding her head and pulling me toward her, "Absolutely, Bella. Just remember I love you so much."

I smile tightening my arms around her. Phil returns his attention to the TV to give us our little mother daughter moment. We pull back and Renee dabs her eyes from the tears rolling down her cheeks. I smile at her before glancing at the clock sighing, "It's getting awfully late."

Renee sighs looking toward the clock on the wall. She nods smiling toward me, "You can go to bed. We'll be leaving fairly early in the morning to get a decent parking spot."

I nod pushing myself up. Renee rubs her upper arms as I stand up causing me to smile as she gazes at the spot I was only just sitting. I sigh turning toward the hallway and moving toward my room. My room is mostly bare again as I push the door open before stepping inside.

I spent the last few days packing up my things into my suitcases. Renee and Phil managed to take me shopping again last week for things to decorate my dorm with. I learned the day before yesterday that I will be sharing a dorm. I'm not too pleased at the revelation but I'm sure I can cope.

The only thing on my bed is a thin blanket since Renee told me that I should take the covers to the dorm with me. At least until she can buy me some new ones. I close the door behind me turning the lock on the back of the door as I've done the past few nights.

I move deeper into the room grabbing my book from the dresser. A book that seems to hold some much meaning to me that I can't even bare to explain, "Pride and Prejudice." My eyes flicker toward "Sense and Sensibility," but just as quickly, I shake my head thinking against reading it. I've read it too many times to know about the main character's name of…

I shake my head stopping myself from saying that name even in my head. I move toward my bed quickly moving under the covers to read.

A few hours later, I wake with a start. I gasp quietly trying to suppress the oncoming nightmare from unfolding once again. I was so sure the nightmares had all but ceased once I went a few nights without any incident. I push myself up something falling into my lap. I reach down grabbing the object to find the book I had fallen asleep reading. I sigh, coming to terms with the fact that the book must have caused a memory flashback that once again turned into a nightmare.

I sit back rubbing my eyes listening for any sound from Renee or Phil. It seems they are both in bed so I quickly grab my covers pulling them from my body before quietly pushing myself to my feet. I push my pillow under the covers to show a sort of person under the covers. Once I'm done, I grab my book from the bed placing it on the dresser before searching the top dresser door.

I grab the only thin sweater that I seem to own from the drawer. I quickly push my arms into the thin gray sweater gently closing the drawer back before glancing toward the floor. I locate a pair of converse on the simple sandals Renee bought me on the floor in front of the dresser. I quickly slip my feet inside before grabbing my phone and new iPod Phil bought me before creeping toward the window.

I had quite a few nights when I first arrived where I couldn't sleep. Sneaking out a window seems childish but it's actually kind of a rush. I push the curtains aside revealing the window where I push the locks open and slowly pull it up.

I glance over my shoulder being completely still and quiet once again. I listen for any sign of noise but a lone snore breaks through and I breathe a sigh of relief. I carefully yet quickly grab the windowpane pulling myself up into the window. I hop down relieved once again that Renee fell in love with a one-story house.

I turn back around grabbing the curtain pulling it back around the window. If Renee checks in on me, she'll think I'm in the bed with the window open blowing a simple breeze in the room. She's checked in on me before having told me at dinner and I told her about it being stuffy in the room so the breeze cools it down enough to sleep.

I turn around walking away from the window toward the side cliff. The beach just below shows the waves turning over itself. The smell assaults my nostrils feeling it completely as I grin jogging down the wooden steps toward the beautiful sand.

My feet immediately hit the sand exciting a sigh from my mouth. I move further down the sand smiling at the sound of the waves. A memory comes to mind of La Push seeing Jacob and flirting with the poor boy. I learned so many things that day that I can't believe Jacob told me all those things.

I sigh sitting down on the sand looking up toward the night sky. Morning will come over the horizon in just a few short hours. I'll leave Renee's house to call a college dorm home for the next few years. I sigh leaning back letting the wind move against my hair.

Tonight will be another night to try to get some information from Alice.

"Alice, I know that you can see me right now. I've made my decision about college so I know you've seen everything from then on."

I sigh shaking my head, "No, that wasn't right."

I look over the water smiling in the wind, "Alice, I've made my decision no matter what happens. I'm going to college and I want him to know that."

I close my eye creating memories from thin air and making a decision I've thought so much about. I smile despite the terror coursing through my veins.

Opening my eyes I smile toward the ocean, "I'm no longer going to mourn over all of you. I'm going to move on because I know it's the right thing to do. Goodbye Alice and take care of yourself."

It was easy for **him **to leave and say goodbye so I'm letting him go. I sigh suddenly hearing his voice in my ears, _Goodbye, Bella. Don't do anything reckless._

My eyes fill with tears as I look over the ocean letting the memories leave along with the ones of **them**. I know it's the only way the nightmares will ever leave me be.

Goodbye, old Bella.

I'm certainly looking forward to my new life at college.


	8. 6

6.

The next morning started unbelievably early as I had finally come back to my room at sunrise. Unfortunately, by the time I had returned to my room Renee was going crazy around the house. I could hear her shrieks as I approached my bedroom window.

My bedroom door was wide open as Renee moved up and down the hallway with Phil right behind her. She was crying excessively holding a phone in her hands. I sigh looking down at my feet knowing I was going to receive a huge lecture about all of this.

I stand at my bedroom door just as Renee steps into my bedroom her eyes moving along everything. She looks at the window her eyes wide before she runs toward the opening, "Bella!"

I attempt a small smile at her before her eyes narrow toward me and her lips deepen in a frown, "Where the hell were you?!"

I frown averting my eyes, "I'm sorry, mom. I woke and couldn't get back to sleep. I decided to climb out the window and walk along the beach. I'm sorry for worrying you about it. I didn't think you'd wake before I got back so that's why I didn't leave any note."

She sighs shaking her head, "I was worried like crazy, Bella. I woke at sunrise and decided to check on you. Normally, I do it earlier but I just woke and had to check on you. You haven't been around here very much and you're by only child, Bella. I am just a mom about see her daughter off to college. I was just really worried about you, Bella."

I smile nodding through the window just as Phil comes into the room, "Did you find her, Renee?"

Renee chuckles, moving from the window so that I can wave at him, smiling. He chuckles shaking his head, "I tried to tell her that you probably couldn't sleep for nerves. She doesn't listen very well."

Renee rolls her eyes at him, "You two just love ganging up on me."

Phil and I both laugh just as a drowsy feeling comes over my body and Phil walks out of the room toward the kitchen. Renee notices first sighing, "Bella, come in through the back door. It's unlocked. You need a couple hours sleep before we get ready to leave."

I smile nodding my head turning around toward the back of the house. There is a sliding glass door and Phil smiles at me from the inside opening the door for me.

He sighs shaking his head and closing the glass door, "The beach is a wonderful place to think, right?"

I smile nodding, "The best."

He nods smiling, "When we first moved in, I went down there every morning to run a couple of laps. It's a little strange how much thinking one can do while completely surrounded by waves and sand."

I smile nodding as Renee steps into the kitchen. She moves toward the cabinet smiling, "Go ahead and get a couple hours of sleep, Bella."

I smile and a yawn explodes from my mouth causing the smile to be a sleepy one. I wave toward them walking from the kitchen down the hallway into my room. The window is still wide open letting in a decent breeze causing me to smile sleepily once again.

I close the door behind me moving toward my bed. The blanket sits on my bed looking untouched a welcome to the cozy bed in my personal opinion. I pull off my green jacket letting it fall to the floor as I slip off my shoes before moving toward my bed. I grab the blanket climbing into bed and lying my head down on the pillow. It takes a few minutes after I close my eyes to fall asleep.

Renee is the one to wake me as Phil stands at the door. It's a good two hours later from when I had lied down. Renee's face is the first thing I see as her voice whispers into my ear, "Bella, honey, it's to get up. We have a lot to do before we leave."

I yawn opening my eyes to see Renee's face right in front of my eyesight. Her closeness causes me to jump at first but I quickly slow my racing heart. Phil chuckles, alerting me to his presence at the door.

I sigh, sitting up and stretching smiling at Renee searching the room, "Let me shower. It'll wake me and then I'll come for breakfast."

She sighs, smiling and nodding, "Sure thing, honey. When you come into the kitchen I'll have your breakfast cooked."

I smile nodding knowing not to argue with her. She's only trying to cook my last breakfast here at her house. She kisses my forehead before pushing herself to her feet from her sitting position on my bed moving toward Phil at the door. She smiles at me her eyes already a little misty, "Don't take too a shower. We want to spend some time with you before we leave."

I smile nodding watching them walk out closing the door behind them. I look around the room my eyes finally adjusting to the light and the wind still blowing into the room.

I shake my head and rub the sleep particles from my eyes pushing myself to my feet. I slowly move toward the window glancing outside catching a glimpse of something moving past along the beach but it's gone before I get a decent look at who or what it could possibly be.

I shake my head again muttering under my breath, "I'm beginning to see things now. Great. Just what I need right now."

I push the window down and lock the black locks on the window smiling at the sound of the lock. I move back toward my dresser seeing the clothes sitting on the corner for today. I roll my eyes grabbing the undergarments and moving toward the bathroom door. I grab the towel from the end of my bed Renee brought for me before smiling and stepping into the bathroom pulling the door closed behind me.

I step out of the bedroom smiling brightly as I walk down the hallway toward the kitchen. I can hear music blasting through from the living room. Classical music blares from the surround sound in the living room and I grin moving toward the system.

The front light glares out showing the title of the song playing through the speakers.

"Clare De Lune, it was always your favorite," says Renee from behind me.

My body flinches at the name but I quickly push it aside turning around smiling at her. She's dressed in a light green tank top and blue jean shorts with flip flops wiping her hands on a dish towel.

I walk toward her as Phil stands behind her placing his hands on her shoulders. I smile toward them both moving toward the counter seeing plates of food littered around the bar.

Suddenly Renee walks into the kitchen leaving Phil behind grabbing my shoulder and turning me toward her. Her eyes widen and a huge grin comes over her face, "You're wearing makeup!"

I groan covering my ears from her squeal as she grins at me, "You finally used the kit I bought you!"

I sigh smiling as I nod my head, "Yeah, mom. Just let me eat some breakfast."

She nods smiling, "Sure thing, honey. Phil and I will just go into the bed room and get our things ready."

I nod moving to sit on the stool under the bar. I fill my plate with pancakes, scrambled eggs, and a couple sausage patties. I grab the syrup from the bar top pouring it all over my food smiling at the stick sweet stuff. I notice the orange juice on the counter grabbing an empty glass and filling it full with the orange juice.

I cut the pancakes taking a bite. As I chew my food, I think over everything that's about to happen today. College is a new thing to explore but having a roommate I'm not so excited about. I'll probably get a girl that's overly obsessed about parties and forcing me by the ends of my hair to join her.

I shake my head glancing toward my wrist seeing the birthday bracelet shining in the light. I sigh turning it around so that I don't have to hear it from my mom about where it came from.

An image of Alice the last time I saw her at that horrible excuse of a birthday comes to mind. The celebration of my birth wasn't worth celebrating but I couldn't tell Alice that. She'd throw the biggest fit that it wasn't quite worth to complain, I just endured the pain she'd put me through.

I sigh taking a drink of the orange juice hearing Renee's giggles from her room. I place the glass back on the counter closing my eyes, taking a minute, and shoving those memories into the back of my mind. I plaster a fake smile on my face just as I hear the footsteps coming into the kitchen.

Renee smiles at me as she walks around the counter toward the cabinets, "So Bella, honey, are you looking forward to meeting your roommate today?"

I shrug my shoulders chewing the food in my mouth, "I don't know. I've never had a roommate before and I don't know what to think. I'm a little nervous to be honest."

She smiles stepping toward the counter grabbing the picture of orange juice pouring some into her glass, "I'm sure everything will work out just fine."

Phil walks into the kitchen smiling at us kissing Renee on the cheek, "I'm going to hit the shower. I stink from the running earlier."

Renee sniffs at him as he walks past her grabbing an apple from the fruit basket. I smile chuckling as Renee's nose sticks up in the air covering the end of her nose and mouth groaning, "Get in the shower!"

Phil smirks toward her moving to wrap his arms around her but she shoves him off pointing toward the entrance of the kitchen. He frowns sticking his bottom lip out causing Renee to shove him out of the kitchen. I shake my head smiling as Renee glances toward me smiling.

She leans over the bar her gray tank top pushing her cleavage together, "So do you have everything packed away?"

I sigh nodding my head wiping my mouth from the food around the edge of my lips, "Yes, mom. I have everything that I can possibly think of packed away."

She sighs nodding glancing toward my now empty plate, "You must have liked the food?"

I smile feeling my cheeks darken once again, "It was good, mom."

She smiles nodding grabbing my plate and placing them in the sink along with my empty glass with only a thin layer of orange juice coating the bottom. She grins, turning around, "So I know your birthday will be during your stay at the college. Do you have any plans in mind yet?"

I shake my head, "It's only August, mom. I haven't even thought about it yet. Have you spoken to dad lately?"

She sighs nodding her head, "He called earlier while you were sleeping. I told him that we were taking you to the campus. I promised that you'd call him once you got settled in your dorm."

I smile nodding. I've spoken to Charlie a few times over the summer. Most conversations only ever lasted about five to six minutes. The longest conversation we had lasted about ten minutes. That's just the way Charlie and I are most of the time. We are extremely awkward at conversations so when it gets quiet and we can't think of anything to say we both just hang up.

I'm trying to make an effort but it doesn't seem to be working. I've tried sticking to the habit of calling him at least once a week but it's gotten to once every two weeks. Things just don't seem to work out for mine and Charlie's relationship. No matter what I do, life and the world don't want me to have the best relationship with my father for some strange reason.

"Bella? Are you listening to me?"

I shake myself looking up at Renee. She's smiling at me and my cheeks darken, "Sorry, mom. I had my head in the clouds."

She sighs nodding, "I could tell. Anyway, I was saying that it seems like Charlie and Sue Clearwater from La Push are together now. Did you meet her children Leah and Seth?"

I rack my brain for any recognition of their names but I come up empty, "Sorry, I don't think I met them. Jake never came over to Charlie's much. At first, he came all the time with Billy but after a few months that changed. He stopped coming around and I never got a chance to meet any of his friends."

Renee nods her lips turning down in a frown trying not to mention that time in my life. I quickly rack my brain for anything to take her mind off the present conversation.

The memory of Renee's excitement at the position of my dorm always seems to get her going.

"You said my dorm was in the best spot for my classes, right?"

Renee smiles nodding her eyes lighting up in excitement, "All of your classes are within walking distance. The cafeteria is close enough that you can eat breakfast and eat lunch before or after class."

I smile nodding, "You know that the cafeteria food probably sucks, right?"

Renee giggles and suddenly we hear footsteps entering the kitchen. I look over my shoulder spotting Phil entering the kitchen. He's dressed in a white short sleeve shirt, brown shorts, and a pair of flip flops. Obviously Renee and Phil have a thing for flip flops not that I'm against them or anything really.

I sigh glancing over at Renee seeing her eyes light up as Phil walks toward her. Suddenly the house phone begins to ring causing Renee to jump moving quickly toward the cordless phone beside the coffee maker.

"Hello?" asks Renee smiling into the receiver.

Suddenly Renee grins widely, "Of course that would be just great, Holly."

A groan quietly slips through my lips at the mention of Holly's name. Phil smirks at me as he leans against the counter. Holly is, unfortunately, a wife of one of Phil's ball buddies. Holly and Renee are the best of friends and are about as hair brained as they come. I don't like Holly because whenever she comes over she brings her daughter and combined they are the type that are always in your face.

Holly's daughter, Brooke, is seventeen, which makes her a year younger than me considering she just turned in July. Brooke wouldn't be so annoying if she minded her own business. I suppose she gets it from her mother, Holly, because Holly is constantly trying to pry into my old life back in Forks. She doesn't ever stop until Renee intervenes into the situation.

Renee nods holding the phone to her ear, "I can't believe that, Holly."

Brooke will be entering her last year of high school this month. Renee has been trying to get Holly to calm down about Brooke's last year in high school. The bad part for Holly is that Brooke has already arranged to travel around the world before her first year of college. Brooke wants to travel for a complete year with her friend, Allyson and her brother, Arthur. The only thing Holly doesn't know is that Brooke has the biggest crush on Arthur and wants to lose her V card before she starts college.

As I said, Brooke can be annoying because of her chatter mouth.

Renee continues to talk to Holly for another two minutes before she quickly ends the conversation, "Listen, Holly, I have to go. I want to spend time with Bella before we take her to the campus."

Renee smiles, "Bye, Holly."

Renee rolls her eyes pulling the phone from her ear and putting it on the charger. I could still hear Holly's voice as Renee hung up the phone.

Renee sighs smiling moving toward the counter turning her attention toward Phil, "Holly said something about Donny and you going out for drinks or eating. She wants us girls to hang out while you two are hanging out."

Phil sighs, "Donny called me yesterday while I was at the cages. I completely forgot about it. He said something about having our families hang out at the Olive Garden or Red Lobster."

Renee nods, "Apparently, Holly found out about this and wants us to do this tonight. Brooke is staying the night with Allyson so she wants to have a late night."

Renee rolls her eyes at the term late night. Holly is a crazy drunk as I've seen her during the summer. I've only been here a few months but that's enough for me to get know Holly.

I smile chuckling at Renee's uncomfortable tone about Holly. Renee probably just wants a night with Phil alone without prying eyes on them.

Renee glances down at her watch her eyes widening, "We should start to pack the SUV before we run out of time."

I sigh pushing myself up from the stool nodding my head. Phil smiles, standing up and moving toward the living room. Renee smiles at me as I step into the hallway moving to my bedroom as I can hear Phil groaning as he grabs my bags from the living room.

I push the door open sighing at the mostly bare room now. All my photos are gone, the blanket is folded on the end of the bed, and the floor is bare once again. It looks emptier than when I first arrived in May. The bed still had the comforter set when I arrived and there was a little bit of color in the room. Now, it just looks dead and empty.

My eyes run across the room as I step inside catching my brown bag draped around the end board of the bed. I smile grabbing the bag and pulling it up my arm. I turn around smiling as I look around the room moving toward the door.

I stand at the door one hand clutching the doorknob while the other hand clutching the strap of my purse. My eyes run across everything in the room mentally saying goodbye to the room that has been my sanctuary for this summer.

"Bella!?" I hear Renee call my name.

I smile closing the door behind me moving toward the living room.

I lean back in the seat of the backseat listening the Renee in the front seat complain about their outing tonight.

"I just don't think tonight is the night to hang out with Holly and Donny. We just need a night to ourselves."

Phil sighs glancing in the rearview mirror at me briefly. I smile at him encouragingly as he smiles toward Renee.

I watch his forehead crinkle as he continues driving down the interstate, "Renee, baby, lets talk about this after we drop off Bella. We can always reschedule with Holly and Donny if it comes to it."

I notice Renee's face flush as she turns around smiling at me. I wave toward her causing her to roll her eyes at me as she turns around in her seat. I look down at my bag sitting beside me on the backseat. I rummage through the contents coming across something I hadn't checked before.

My eyes widen in astonishment as I quickly unfold the small rectangle. The image almost causes a gasp to come from my mouth but I stop myself. My eyes fill with tears as my eyes move along the image.

I had completely forgotten that this bag had been in the suitcase that went missing. I had been so taken by the bracelet at the bottom of the suitcase I never bothered with checking the bag.

I turn the picture over to the backside surprised the inked words haven't come off.

_Edward, Charlie's Kitchen_

The image is the last picture I managed to take of him before he left. He had taken it with him but Alice must have found it. She wanted me to have this for some reason. My fingers move across the image taking in everything I haven't seen.

The perfection of his face, the shade of his rock hard skin, and just the perfection that is Edward Cullen. I sniffed my nose quickly shoving the picture back into my bag. Suddenly the SUV slows down as I look up seeing the exit come into view.

Renee squeals from the passenger seat clapping her hands, "This is it. Just think, Bella, college. It's just the best possible thing in life."

I sigh nodding my head as Renee turns in her seat smiling at me. I reach up wiping my eyes releasing a fake yawn in an attempt to wipe my tear-filled eyes.

I hear Renee sigh, "I sure hope that you get some sleep tonight, Bella. You deserve to have the best sleep for your first day at class."

I smile nodding, "I hope so, Mom. I'll need it for my first class. Did you by any chance find out the name of my roommate?"

Renee sighs shaking her head, "Afraid not. All I know is that she's your only roommate. They roomed you with a girl who's in her second year. As far as I know, after this year or maybe it's the next year that's her last. They told me she will be transferring out to another college."

I nod acting as if I'm paying attention to what she's saying. In reality, I've only caught a few words here and there. The picture sitting in my bag is glued to the back of my eyelids. Every time I blink, I see his face from that picture. I can't even believe how my memory is so faulty.

My memory doesn't do him justice in the slightest.

I look up and out the window seeing the scenery past by. I glance out the windshield watching Phil pull into the entrance of the college. The entire parking lot is packed to capacity. No matter where I look, I can spot a taxi.

Renee grins looking all around, "This is so exciting. I sure that your college experience will be a good one."

I sigh rolling my eyes, "I'm just hoping for a decent one."

Phil chuckles, causing Renee to glare over at him. Renee gives Phil directions toward the dorm complex as I stare out the window. There are so many different people all around the parking lot. I notice most of the girl in tank tops with bikinis underneath and ridiculously short shorts.

Phil pulls the SUV up into the only empty parking place. Phil cuts the engine smiling at Renee as unbuckles her seatbelt. Renee is clutching the brochure in her hands as if entire life depended on it. I sigh unbuckling my own seatbelt and grabbing my bag before pushing the door open and stepping out behind Renee.

Phil and Renee are standing at the rear of the SUV as I join them. Phil smiles at me while Renee grins widely. Her eyes move over the smaller box suddenly grabbing one and pushing it into my arms, "Take this one, Bella. Go ahead up and find your dorm. We'll be right behind you."

I sigh fixing the box in my arms. I smile walking past them behind the crowd moving toward the door on the side of the building. I suddenly begin noticing whistles surrounding me as I walk toward the door. I glance around noticing a group of boys whistling toward a blonde girl with a pink tank top, a pair of black shorts, and white flip-flops on her feet.

The boys are motioning toward her suggestively causing the girl to raise her middle finger toward them. I quietly giggle to myself stepping inside the building. Another group of men bundle, past me down the hallway laughing.

I shake my head moving toward the staircase knowing my room is on the second floor. I sigh sidestepping out of the way of a couple black haired girls. The toss their hand over their shoulders as they stick their noses in the air before walking past me.

Apparently, Renee forgot to mention it's a coed dorm complex. I'm not complaining so far right now.

I step out of the stairwell into the hallway section. The entire hallway is full of people moving in and out of dorms. There is music coming from one of the rooms and suddenly I hear the rush of wheels behind me. I turn my head glancing over my shoulder my eyes widening as a boy with shaggy brown hair comes down the hallway riding a skateboard.

I move out of his way as he skids past me. He suddenly stops tossing his hair back and pulling the skateboard up beside him. He smiles toward a couple of girls standing in the doorway of one of the dorms.

He turns toward me smiling and bowing randomly, "My lady. I'm sorry to have scared you. My name is Axel but my friends call me Axe."

I raise my eyebrow at him smiling, "I scare easily I'm afraid. My name's Isabella but I prefer Bella."

He smiles sticking his hand out but I frown showing the box. He chuckles nodding, "New here?"

I shrug, "How did you guess?"

He smiles widely, "The box for one and you seem awfully surprised by everything going on in the hallway. Anyway, where are you off to?"

I smile, "Dorm 224."

His eyes widen and a smirk forms on his lips, "I know that dorm like the back of my hand. That's Bec's room. Come on, I'll show you the way."

He steps up beside me walking down the hallway. I sigh noticing the looks from the other girls. It's beginning to remind me of my first day at Forks High School. I was the shinny new toy as Jessica once told me. Although if I'm not mistaken it seems as if Axel is the only one that sees me the same way.

"So, Bella," begins Axel smiling brightly and waving at other students, "where are you from?"

I sigh, "All over really. I was living with my father for a year and a half before I came here for college. My mom talked me into it."

He nods, "I take it you didn't have anyone special back with your father."

I shake my head not wanting to broach on the subject too much. Suddenly we take a right moving down a quieter hallway but it's still a little noisy. There are still a bunch of people moving down the hallway but it's a lot less than the main hallway.

Axel suddenly slows down fixing his hair, "What are you doing?"

He chuckles, "Just freshening up before we see Bec."

I nod shrugging my shoulders and moving ahead of him. I notice the numbers on the doors spotting 223. The next door is wide open and the sound of pop music can be heard.

I turn my head raising an eyebrow, "Are you ready?"

He grins smiling and nodding, "You think I'm crazy or weird. Think whatever you want. You aren't a male in this college. Every single guy on this campus has a thing for your roommate."

I was mentally groaning inside my head. Just the thing I need. I am much more comfortable just fading past everyone without a glance.

Axel steps ahead first grinning as he steps into the dorm, "Hey Bec."

I hear a sigh from inside the dorm, "Axe please not now."

Her voice sounded light. Not nearly as light as I remember Alice's voice but definitely light. I sigh pulling enough courage up and moving into the ray of light shining from the dorm.

I step inside looking around smiling. The walls are a light tan color with a decent dark carpet that doesn't throw off the room. There are two beds in the room with one fully dressed in a pink and black comforter. The other bed is completely bare and that side of the room looks dead compared to the other side.

I can certainly tell that her side of the room is the one covered in posters and such. There is a poster of male surfer on her side of the wall while her desk is covered in a bunch of books and folders.

I turn my head hearing Axel and the girl fuss. Axel is busy arguing with a blonde hair girl that is clearly a couple inches taller than he is. I can see what Axel was talking about when he said that all the men on campus have a thing for this girl.

She is the ultimate boy's wet dream. She's tanned and toned. She's dressed in a yellow and white striped shirt with a pair of dark green shorts with a dark brown belt threaded through the shorts. Her feet are covered in a pair of gold dark strap sandals.

I bite my lips clearing my throat I catch their attention, "Excuse me."

Axel grins as the girl huffs turning her head and shrieking out, "What?!"

Her blue eyes widen as she takes in my appearance. A split second passes before a smile forms on her lips, "You must be Isabella Marie Swan?"

I smile small, "I prefer just Bella, please."

She grins nodding and quickly moving toward me taking the box from my hand and pushing it toward Axel. Axel then places the box down on the empty bed.

She steps toward me holding her hand out, "My name's Rebecca Dawson. I'm the vice president of the drama club here at Florida State College."

I smile taking her hand and shaking it pleasantly.

She moves toward the center of the room smiling, "I'm not like most roommates, Bella. I won't get mad if you come on my side of the room, but I will get mad if you go through my things. Obviously your side is the bare side while the side with color is completely mine."

I smile nodding, "Okay, that I can do."

I move to the empty bed pulling my bag from my arm and dropping it to the bed. Suddenly Axel moves from his standing position as something buzzes from his pants. I glance out the corner of my eye watching as he pulls out a cell phone.

His fingers move quickly against the buttons apparently texting someone. He sighs grinning as he snaps the phone shut, "It's been nice talking to you ladies, but Axe man has got to bounce."

He quickly walks out of the room yelling down the hallway as I hear the sound of wheels against the carpeted floor. Rebecca sighs from her side of the room, "I swear that boy is something else. I still don't believe that his mother had him checked out. It just doesn't seem likely."

I smile as Rebecca begins moving things on her bed. I notice boxes littering around her bed for the first time. Suddenly I hear a familiar shriek from down the hallway. I groan turning around seeing Renee and Phil entering the dorm.

I glance over at Rebecca seeing her smiling nodding her head.

Bella, girl, you certainly aren't in Forks anymore.


	9. 7

7.

I smile at Renee's teary face as we stand outside. I've already gotten all my things into my dorm. The only thing that I have left to do is say goodbye to Renee and Phil so I can escape back to my dorm.

She gasps yet again suddenly throwing her arms around my neck and clutching my shoulders, "Oh, Bella! I can't leave you!"

I sigh patting her back attempting to console her, "I'll be fine, Mom."

My eyes locate Phil smiles as he leans against the SUV. I stare at him pleading with my eyes for his help. He chuckles moving toward Renee who has started cry yet again. She first started her crying back in the dorm. It wasn't easy to pry her out of the building, as she probably already knew leaving the building meant leaving me.

Phil grabs Renee by the arm once again pulling her into his arms, "Renee, baby, Bella has to get back inside. She's got new friends to attend with."

Renee sighs, straightening hers clothes smiling at me, "You'll be fine, right Bella?"

I smile nodding my head, "Of course, mom. It's just college what could go wrong?"

Renee rolls her eyes opening her mouth but then stopping herself before she can say anything else. I shrug my shoulders at her strange behavior as Phil slithers his arm around her shoulders.

Renee smiles up at me moving to wrap her arms around me for the last time. She squeezes my body closer to her smiling as she pulls away, "I love you, Bella. Remember that."

I smile nodding my head, "I love you too mom. Don't forget that alright?"

She nods smiling, "I won't. Go have fun for a change, Bella. Remember to email me about everything."

I giggle nodding watching as Phil grabs Renee's hand causing her to sigh once again. She smiles sadly at me, "Goodbye Bella. Be safe."

I sniff nodding watching Phil drag her to the passenger side of the SUV. I stand in front of the vehicle waving at them as Phil shuts the door and jogging to the driver side. He climbs in driver side immediately starting the car while pulling his seat belt over and locking the doors. I grin at Renee's sad face once the sound of the locks hit her ears.

Phil backs out of the spot as I continue to wave smiling as they drive down the parking lot back to the interstate. I sigh lowering my arm and glancing around me. The sounds of the college surrounding me enter my ears causing me to sigh.

I turn toward the entrance of the college once again moving to my dorm. I can only hope that Rebecca isn't in the room and I can decorate my side of the dorm the way I prefer. Suddenly a voice yells out from the door of the college, "Bella!"

I glance up to see Axel skateboarding toward me on the sidewalk. I giggle as he attempts some type of trick as he skids along the sidewalk.

"What's up Axe?"

I've already learned that Axel prefers Axe to his real name. Everyone seems to call him that and not just his friends.

He chuckles shrugging his shoulders, "Bec wants to know if you want to go with her to the activities fair. You can sign up for things like drama club and DJs. Anything you want."

I shake my head, "Doesn't seem like my thing."

Axe chuckles as we walk into the building. He tucks his skateboard underneath his arm nodding his head as we begin to climb the steps, "I kind of figured that. She left already with her best friend Phoebe to make sure everything for drama club was quote on quote "Perfect."

I giggle nodding my head, "She seems like a perfectionist."

Axel smirks nodding his head, "Sometimes she's like that while other times she can be downright nasty. Just wait until you meet Vic and Wilson. Those two fight over her like cats and dogs behind her back."

I chuckle nodding my head as we finally get to our floor. Axe puts the skateboard on the floor sliding against the floor as we walk down trying to avoid the other people littering the hallway.

"Is it always like this?"

Axel chuckles shaking his head, "By the time we go to class tomorrow everything will quiet down. The first weekend will be parties and then it will get quieter. Hey, do you want to meet my best friend? He's my roommate."

I sigh shrugging my shoulders, "Might as well. I have a feeling you'll introduce me to him later if not now."

Axel chuckles, nodding his head as he reaches down to the floor for his skateboard. He turns to the left toward a door with huge "Do Not Disturb" sign taped on the door. He pulls out a set of keys pushing it into the lock and turning the knob.

I hear the sounds of a video game inside as he grabs my wrist pulling me into the room. The dorm is about the same size as Rebecca's and mine. The floor is covered in clothes already while a young man sits in a beanbag type chair holding a controller.

I glance around the room noticing the different sides of the room. Once side has posters of snowboarders and skateboards with a rack above the bead holding a huge skateboard. The bed is unmade and the sheets are as wrinkle as they'll ever get.

The other side shows pictures of normal skaters. The bedside table is covered in books and a picture frame of a nerdy girl with her hair pulled back and glasses on her face. There's a boy with his arm wrapped around her and he's kissing her cheek as they both smile at the camera.

"Bella?"

I turn my head toward Axel as he smiles at me. I realize the sounds of the video game have all but ceased as I follow Axe's eyes. The boy sitting in the beanbag has stood to his feet so that I can now get a decent look at his face.

He's definitely a skater by the clothes he's wearing and the snakebites on the front of his face. I smile pleasantly at him as he grins giving me a dimple smile, "Hi, I'm Stanley, but I prefer Stan. I sure hope this boy hasn't been bothering you too much."

I shrug, "He's harmless so far. I'm Bella by the way."

Stan smiles nodding his head, "Trust me; he'll get on your nerves eventually."

Axel rolls his eyes moving toward his side of the room. He drops his skateboard to the floor before collapsing on his bed, "Bella here is Rebecca Dawson's new roommate."

Stan's eyes widen, "She was serious about that? Having a roommate this year?"

Axe chuckles, "I tried to tell you man. She's leaving after this semester. You don't want to believe a word I say. She's finally gotten off her trogon horse."

Stan chuckles dropping down to his beanbag before grabbing his controller. I give them both curious confused glances causing Axel to sigh beckoning me toward him. I take a seat on the rolling chair backwards as he gives me a straight face.

"Rebecca Dawson has been here three years already. She's changing schools because her father found a better Arts program. It's in Miami, where she's originally from, it's expensive. Anyway, Rebecca's never had a roommate before because she claimed it was to help her study better as having a roommate doesn't help with that simple thing. Everyone knows the real reason is so that she could have how ever many guys she wants to a night."

My eyes widen, "So let me get this straight, my roommate is the quote on quote college "Whore?"

Stan busts out laughing at my question, "I've never heard anyone say it like that. Whatever you do, don't let Rebecca hear you say that. She'll go ape shit on you."

I nod sighing lowering my gaze toward the floor, "So what exactly have I gotten myself into?"

Axel shakes his head, "Hopefully this semester won't be like the rest. Bec has night classes this year by her request. She'll have classes for about three hours and then party the rest of the night. She'll probably collapse at Vic's dorm at the frat house."

I nod, "Victor is a frat boy?"

Axel chuckles, "Victor Mikes is the frat boy at this campus. He and Rebecca met their freshman year. She was really into her studies at the time and knew Vic was nothing but a player. He still is which is the reason they are friends with benefits."

I nod listening as Stan clears his throat while playing the game. I nod, "Who's this Wilson guy that you mentioned earlier?"

Stan chuckles, "Stan is Rebecca's best friend from high school. He followed her here like a little lap dog. He's even in drama club even though he's pursuing a history major."

I nod, "Sounds like he wants to be more than friends."

Axel and Stan chuckle, "Trust me, Rebecca Dawson is the drama queen of this college. Not just because of the drama club but because of her actual life."

I nod realizing I've got my hands cut out for me this semester.

I collapse on my bed after finally getting my side of the room fixed. The room is quiet but the hallway is completely noisy. I stare up at the ceiling happy with the newfound silence in my head and the fact that neither Renee nor Phil is going to come busting through the door.

I'm a little relieved at the fact that Rebecca has night classes. I can deal with the nightmares on my own and not have to deal with her complaints from keeping her up at all hours of the night.

I turn on my side boredom finding me all of a sudden. I suddenly hear the sounds of wheels on the floor as the come to a sudden stop at my door. A double set of knocks sounds at the door causing me to push myself up yelling out, "It's unlocked!"

I hear a chuckle as the door opens wider showing Axel's smiling face, "Hey, are you hungry? Stan and his girlfriend, Hillary wants to go out for pizza."

I smile nodding, "Sure that sounds good actually. Do I have to pay?"

Axel shakes his head, "No, you don't have to pay. Just come on. They are in a huge hurry."

I chuckle pushing myself from my bed and grabbing my set of keys before stepping outside of the door. I make sure the door is locked up tightly before following Axel down the hallway.

"So, where exactly does you father live, Bella?"

I sigh, "Forks, Washington."

Axel's eyes widen shaking his head, "That's a far stretch to come here."

I shrug my shoulders, "I only lived with him a year before my mom talked me into coming here. I lived with her before when she lived in Phoenix."

Axel nods, "You must be originally from Forks. You are ghostly pale."

I smile nodding, "I was born there but my parents split a few years after I was born. Renee, my mom, and I moved around a lot until she found my step dad Phil."

We finally make it to his dorm where I can hear two people arguing inside. Axe just laughs quietly shaking his head as he pushes the door open. He drops his skateboard to the floor alerting the two arguing people to our presence.

I notice a girl with white rimmed glasses and her hair pulled back in a ponytail. She's dressed in a pair of jean capris, plain white sneakers, and blue tank top with a simple white button shirt opened to show her tank top. She's certainly not from around her as I can almost just tell by her appearance. She reminds me a little bit of Angela back in Forks. Just thinking about her makes me miss the sound of her voice and her reassuring answers to every question I asked.

She smiles glancing toward Axel, "So, Axe who's you friend?"

Axel chuckles as Stan sighs answering for him, "This is Bella, Hillary. She's Rebecca Dawson's new roommate."

Her eyes widen as a huge smirk spreads across her face, "Good luck having her as a roommate. I'm Hillary Millard, Stan's girlfriend. I should tell you now, if you hang out with us it'll be just a matter of time before Rebecca and her crew begin to label you as a nerd."

I smile nodding, "I really don't care. Rebecca doesn't seem like my type of girlfriend anyway."

Hillary nods smiling, "Well, her and her crew made sure that I wouldn't have any friends. I became the school nerd after I arrived two years ago. She was already here for a year to make friends and I suppose I was an easy target. It got better when this boy showed up last year. I don't what I would do without him."

Axel chuckles as Hillary threads her fingers with Stan's, "Probably find a teacher to argue with as much."

Hillary frowns turning a glare toward Axel, "Axe, just keep on. I'll tell the entire campus our big secret."

Axel frowns shaking his head, "That's just plain cruel."

Hillary shrugs her shoulders, "Well, are we ready to go?"

We all nod stepping out of the dorm. Stan uses his keys to lock the door as we all move down the hallway toward the steps. Hillary engages Stan in conversation about her new class schedule. I received mine from home last week and I can only hope that I can deal with the workload they've put me on. I don't seem to have time to myself as my workload for the semester can beat with workaholic.

I clear my throat as we step outside moving down the parking lot, "Has anyone had to speak to the counselor as part of their schedule?"

Everyone stops moving turning around gazing at me weirdly. Axel shakes his head, "They used to require new freshmen from other states to see the counselor. What counselor do you have to see?"

I sigh, "Ms. Bernice Gregory."

The boys sigh continuing to walk while Hillary drops back to walk with me, "Did anything happen to you before you came here?"

I shrug my shoulders, "Nothing in particular, why?"

Hillary sighs lowering her gaze toward the floor, "Ms. Gregory is more like a grief counselor. She not only helps you adjust to a new environment, she helps you to get over the person who's no long with you."

My eyes widen and my locks up, "A grief counselor?! Why in the world would the college assign me to meet with her three times a week?"

Hillary stops walking and I notice the boys have moved toward a light blue pickup truck in the parking lot. Hillary sighs and uncomfortable look on her face, "The only way the college could even think assigning you to meet with her is that a parent has to request it. Can you not think of anything that would force your mother's hand to request a grief counselor? I can understand that you are from out of state just by the way, you dress. I know this about Bernice because my parents forced me to. I should warn you that if you go in there and don't talk, she could request you to come more than three days a week. The more progress you make, the less day's you'll go. I didn't know this about her and it went from twice a week to five times a week. I had lost my best friend back home to a drunk driver and it was hard."

I sniff my nose feeling incredible anger boiling in my veins. Why would Renee do this to me? Why did she tell about it? She knew I would get upset!

I shake my head moving my legs toward the truck, "I didn't loose anyone. He left me. End of story."

Hillary sighs from behind me grabbing my arm forcing me to come to a halting stop, "Bella, you forced her hand. You must have showed her your father that you were grieving. I've seen it before from my best friend when she lost her boyfriend. He just left her because he didn't want her anymore. She gave up on life and tried to kill herself a dozen times. The night she was killed, she was coming back from the library. She was finally getting her life in order when she was killed. I blame myself every single day because I didn't do a damn thing to her. Bella, you don't know me at all but I want you to know that I'm here for you whenever you need me."

I sigh refusing to turn my head toward her. She sighs releasing her hold on my arm and moving toward the truck. She climbs in the cab as Axel steps out. He grins at me as they two lovebirds snuggle in the front seat, "We'll have to ride in the back. Only three people can sit inside."

I sigh smiling and moving toward the back of the truck. Axel helps me climb into the bed of the truck as he climbs in after me. I squat down sitting directly behind the back windows as Axel sits right beside me.

Stan drives the truck out of the parking lot while my mind is a mess. I can't talk to a damn counselor about him. That's what no one seems to understand. I can't risk anyone else's safety because I can't get over my ex vampire boyfriend. It just doesn't make sense why Renee would do something like this.

I never asked her about it at her house because I just thought it was a freshman thing. I suppose I can say a couple of things about him to get her off my back a little bit. She won't know what something's a lie or not. I just hope this counselor isn't some strange human lie detector then my entire plan is ruined.

Deep inside I wish that Alice had vision that forced her hand to change it. I don't know what else to think. I wish Alice were here because when I can't talk to anyone else she was the person I could turn to through anything in my life. She understood and never second-guessed anything. I remember sitting in the awful hotel room for days as Jasper struggled being close to me and talking her.

I learned so many things from that time.

_"Alice's visions are subjective. A person changes their mind, the vision changes."_

My eyes widen as a grin comes to my face but then immediately falls again. If I don't know what her vision was, in the first place how can I change it?

Whatever path I'm on has one of two outcomes. Either I'm perfectly safe living a complete human life and die when I get old and gray haired or something happens and I die an early death.

I just wish I knew Alice's visions just once. That way I know what happens and I can stay on the path that puts me closer to death. A complete human life isn't what I want without him. I still want my forever and I'll figure out a way to get it. Even if it puts me face to face with death itself.


	10. 8

8.

Sleeping on a college campus, the first night is anything but easy. Just because tomorrow is the first day of classes doesn't mean anything to most of the student population. My eyes are wide-open against the moonlight shining in the window.

Rebecca had come to the dorm while I was gone with Axe, Stan, and Hillary. She's apparently going to some kind of frat party and staying with her friend Victor for the night. I could really care less about what she's doing. She'll stay up all night and sleep all day before her night class's tomorrow night.

I groan turning over toward the wall once again. According to Axel and Hillary, breakfast is served from five thirty in the morning until seven thirty. My first class starts at eight sharp, which all means that I can get up at six and still have plenty of time. Take a decent fifteen to twenty minute shower, get some breakfast, and make it to class on time. I can only hope.

None of this makes a difference, though, if I can't sleep even a wink. I groan as the sound of the chaos in the hallway seeps under the door. I can't sleep with all the noise these people want to make. I want to kill Renee for putting me in the one dorm complex that doesn't care about the one thing we humans require, sleep.

I close my eyes once again begging for sleep to find me again. The sound of music floats toward my ears forcing me to quietly scream under my breath. I sit up in my moving to my bedside lamp pulling the cord to envelope the room in complete light.

I shake my head glancing at the clock.

_9:39pm._

I'm never going to get a decent night's sleep around here. I shake my head tossing the cover from my body and pushing myself from my bed. The school furnished me a desk at Renee and Phil request, which is a huge relief that I don't have to study or do homework from my bed.

I move to the chair pushing my laptop screen up. I quickly type in the password moving to the internet explorer icon. I decide to check my email in hopes that someone from Forks actually misses me for a change.

I quickly type in my email and password waiting for it to load. I ray of vehicle lights blare into the window as I shake my head. I sure hope that I learn some way of getting some sleep around here.

My phone suddenly begins vibrating from the bedside table. I shake my head pushing myself up moving toward the phone. I grab it returning to the rolling chair and flipping the phone open.

One New Text Message from _**$Axe$!**_

I chuckle shaking my head at the name. He must have put his name in my phone at the pizza parlor. I quickly open the message giggling at it.

_Sleeping well? :D I bet not! ;)_

I roll my eyes hitting reply.

_Obviously not! 2 much noise…Wht's the secret 2 good sleep?_

I hit the send button placing the phone on the desk. I check my email to find three new messages.

One from Angela- angieweb .

One from Jessica- jessbabe

One from Jacob- jacobblack

The one from Jake is a huge surprise as I didn't expect to hear anything from him. I decide to read the girls messages first as they probably want to know about college.

I double click Angela's message smiling as it quickly loads.

_From: Angela Weber (angieweb )_

_To: Bella Swan(bellaswan )_

_Subject: What's up?!_

_Hey Bella! I was just writing to talk for a minute. Ben is bugging me like crazy to get something to eat. So, I heard from my mom who in turn heard from someone else (you know how Forks is) that you're moving to the campus. I was just curious about how it's going. I haven't heard from you all summer. I miss you, Bella. You're my best friend. I guess I should go before Ben has a heart attack. Remember don't do anything I wouldn't do! Don't laugh, I'm serious!_

_-Angie_

_PS: Ben wants to know if you made any new friends at college._

I chuckle shaking my head. I move the mouse hitting reply.

_Hey Angie! Everything is all well with me. College hasn't gotten started just yet. As for Ben's question, I've made a few friends already even though it's my first day. Axel and Stanley are best friends they are both skate type boys. Axel skateboard while Stan just rollerblades. Stan's girlfriend seems real nice though, Hillary. My roommate reminds me a little too much of Lauren in the aspect that she wants to act and she tends to sleep around. College gossip on her is like the gossip around Forks when I moved in with my dad._

_Just between you and me, Angie, my mom did something. I can't believe she did it though. You can tell Ben but I'd prefer that you didn't tell anyone else. It's a crazy thing but I don't want a lot of people knowing. She requested a counselor for me to talk with three times a week. Apparently, she's more a grief counselor than anything. I can't believe she's done this to me. What am I supposed to do when I tell her he's not dead and that he just left. It's not grief and just because it took me a while to get over him doesn't mean I was going through the grief process._

I sigh shaking my head pulling my hands from the keyboard. This isn't a good idea. I'm already still so angry at Renee for what did that I don't care who knows about it. I glance back up shaking my head and hitting the save button. I'll reply to her message later maybe.

I open Jessica's message next. I roll my eyes at the length of the message.

_From: Jessica Stanley (jessbabe )_

_To: Bella Swan(bellaswan )_

_Subject: Hey!_

_What up, Bella! Everything's good here. Mike and I are having fun at college. I heard Angela was messaging you so I thought I would too. Just let me know what's going on with you soon. Between you and me, Mike is beginning to get on my last nerve. He's looking at all the other older college girls. Speaking of college people are there any hot college guys at your school? Send me pics! Later!_

I shake my head hitting the check mark on her message before hitting the delete button. There's one thing I love about friendship over computer not having to pretend to be someone's friend. Lauren and Jessica were the two people I never really liked back in Forks anyway. I just didn't like being mean to their faces.

Last, to open is Jacob's message. I'm actually looking forward to his message surprisingly.

_From: Jacob Black (jacobblack )_

_To: Bella Swan(bellaswan )_

_Subject: Hiya Bella!_

_Hey, Bells! Just open the pic. Sue wanted me to send it to you instead from her email._

_-Jacob._

I chuckle opening the picture he attached to the message. A huge grin comes to my face as I recognize the image from before I left. Sue and Charlie must have gotten it developed in the last few weeks or months. It contains me, Charlie, and Sue in Charlie's kitchen. It was taken with Sue's camera that she received from Leah for her birthday. Sue was so happy to have a digital camera that the first picture she took was of all three of us.

I smile saving the image to my computer before logging out of my email. I'll message Angie back later when I'm in a better mind set. I'm just so angry at my mom right now that I can barely think about anything else. I suddenly notice lights shining from my cell phone.

I reach out opening it laughing at the messages.

Three New Messages from _**$Axel$!**_

First Message:

_Wht secret? Tell me!_

Second Message:

_Stan says put headphones on ears. I say use cotton balls or earplugs!_

Third Message:

_R u still there, Bella?_

I smile hitting reply on the last message.

_I'm still here! Checkin email…I thnk I'll use my cotton balls! I want to hear my alarm clock in mornin! Night Axe!_

I hit the send button just as a yawn comes from my mouth. I press and hold the end button on my phone before sliding it on my desk. I quickly shut down my laptop and close it standing to my feet. I stretch my arms above my head as I move toward my bed.

I climb into my bed smiling sleepily as I turn toward my bedside table. I pull open the drawer on the front locating my box of cotton balls. I quickly stuff both my ears with cotton balls before dropping the box back in the drawer. I quickly close the drawer and pulling the cord on the lamp enveloping the room in darkness once again.

I grin as I lower myself into bed pulling the covers underneath my chin from the chill of the a/c. My eyes flutter close welcoming sleep for the new day to come.

The next morning came early. I wasn't in a good mood as I hoped I would be. My stomach was a bundle of nerves and to top it all off I learned I was seeing the counselor today. My day wasn't getting off to the best start. I stand in my dorm after showering clutching at the strap of my backpack as I read my schedule.

I have to meet with my counselor before lunch every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. While everyone else would be having class I'd be in the office talking to a counselor about my problems. I wanted to call Renee last night as soon as I got to my dorm but my more rational side was against it.

I knew she was having a night with the girls and much needed night with Phil. I couldn't do that to here even though she completely ignored everything that came from my mouth over the summer. I tried to explain to her that I'd talk about it when I was ready. You can't force someone to tell you their deepest feelings when they can't even trust you. I know from just this one thing that I'll never be able to tell Renee anything that she could use against me. She's my own mother and I can't trust her anymore.

All I needed was some time on my own. I've been around so many people since he left that I haven't been able to process anything on my own. I needed to come up some type of lie to tell Renee and Charlie on my own terms. I will never be able to tell them the truth so I needed to come up with the decent lie. Renee has just ruined everything by forcing this upon me.

I shake my head folding the paper and stuffing it into my shorts pocket. It feels strange to wear shorts two days in a row outside of Renee's house. I barely wore shorts two days in a row at her house because they felt too foreign even to me. I sigh grabbing my keys and phone before moving to the door I step out looking both ways before I pull the door closed jamming the key inside affectively locking the door completely.

"Bella?"

I jump turning my head to see Axel with Hillary standing right beside him. I smile pulling my key from the door and moving toward them, "Morning guys."

Axel glares catching the yawn from his mouth while Hillary shakes her head grinning. She looks toward me her grin wider, "The boys decided to have an all nighter on the game system. Stan got more hours and Axe did apparently."

I chuckle shaking my head, "So that's why you were texting me at nine forty five last night."

Hillary smiles, "Have a hard time sleeping?"

I shrug my shoulders, "After I found some cotton balls it was easy to fall asleep."

Hillary giggles nodding her head, "I stayed on this hall during my first year. It wasn't easy and after the first six months I requested a dorm change. I got a single in a much quieter dorm. Those people actually care to get up for class in the morning."

I nod following them down the hallway. We don't turn instead keep straight toward the set of stairs on this side. Axe pushes the door open and I see Stan yawning as he leans against the wall. I smile at him as he gives a sleepy smile before placing his arm around Hillary's shoulders.

We trudge down the stairs and outside. The cafeteria is up ahead so that we can have breakfast.

"So," starts Hillary since she's the only other person with energy to talk, "what's everyone having fro breakfast?"

Axel shrugs, "Eggs, toast and milk. I don't feel like anything else."

Stan yawns again slipping out, "Bacon biscuit."

I smile, "Probably just some cereal. I'm not a big breakfast person and my stomach is already nervous as it is."

Hillary grins nodding, "I'm having some oatmeal with an apple. I'll probably get some orange juice along with it."

I notice Hillary's hair is down as she smile against the rising sun. We all locate the entrance for the cafeteria and move inside. The entire room is full but there is at least one small table that's completely empty. I sigh moving behind Axel as Stan and Hillary move toward the table.

Axel chuckles, "The oatmeal Hillary wants is served at the bar while Stan probably wants to catch some shut eye. I always grab both our things in the morning."

I nod smiling as we approach the food line. I grab tray with corn flakes, an orange, and biscuit while a carton of milk for the cereal. I smile at the lunch lady putting in my number that gives me free breakfast and lunch on campus.

I follow Axe toward the table smiling at Hillary and Stan once again. Stan's head is lying on the table as drool begins to seep from the corner of his mouth. Axel laughs at the sight as I pull my backpack around my body placing it on the empty stool.

"Why doesn't Stan just switch to night classes?" I ask moving to fix my cereal.

Axel chuckles as he cuts up his eggs shaking his head, "He can't. The school already told him that for his major this semester there aren't any night classes. He took all night classes last semester which is the reason for the strange behavior."

Hillary smiles shrugging her shoulders, "He told me that he has a couple skating competitions at night coming up. He can't miss them in order to qualify for nationals or regionals."

I nod smiling as I swallow down the cereal in my mouth. Hillary smiles eating on her apple as she pulls out a piece of paper I guess to be her schedule.

"What's everyone's first class?"

Axel smiles grinning widely, "Mrs. Reynolds."

Hillary rolls her eyes, "I have that first too. Just great, you'll be copying off my things all semester. Anyway, I know Stan as Mr. Stints in Calculus. What about you Bella?"

I shrug pulling out the piece of paper from my shorts. I run my finger down the paper seeing my first class, "Apparently it's Mr. Samson. Freshman orientation."

Axel and Hillary both start laughing their giggling quickly becoming annoying. I raise an eyebrow slipping the paper back into my shorts pocket. Axel calms down first enough to tell me about my first teacher of the day.

"Mr. Samson is one of those nervous teachers. He stutters a lot so I suggest that you study on your own until you understand everything."

I groan nodding my head, "That sucks."

Axel smirks, "Trust me you haven't heard tough yet."

I nod returning to my food. We all finish eating our food just as the bell rings to get to class. Stan is jolted away by the sound as he grabs his food from the tray moving from the table. I giggle at his reaction glancing toward Hillary. She grins at me, "He'll inhale that biscuit before he even makes it to his desired hallway. I'll catch ya later, Bella."

I smile waving at her as I tap Axel on the shoulder. He smiles turning toward me, "Need help finding the way?"

I grin, "If you don't mind."

He waves me off taking the paper from my hand reading the number off. He grins before handing it back to me, "Follow me."

I swallow down my nerves as I sit outside the counselor's office. I smile at the passerby's as they move toward their next class. I just hope that none of the guys worry about me too much. I was too embarrassed by the fact that I have to come here that I didn't tell anyone about it.

I just want to meet this woman and get this appointment over. I don't care if I say anything or if I don't. I just want this day to be over once and for all. I want the day to end and I sleep away the night.

I shake my head trying to get rid of the thoughts clouding my brain. The door beside me opens and I hear a female voice, "Isabella Swan?"

I sigh grabbing my backpack from the floor standing to my feet, "That'd be me."

She steps back into her office before I catch her face. I step in behind her overlooking the objects in her room. Her office is simple with a few plaques on the wall showing her awards for things. I locate a leather couch against the wall and I instinctively move toward the couch dropping my back to the floor.

I take a seat on the couch my eyes moving toward her. She stands at her desk her hair clipped to the back of her head showing her face. She's younger than I expected probably only in her thirties.

"Isabella, I've heard a lot about you from your mother, Renee. She thought that I could help you adjust to college life in Florida."

I roll my eyes since she isn't looking at me. She grabs a folder and clipboard before moving toward a chair in front of the couch. She's dressed in a simple light pink skirt that comes to her knees with white tank top underneath a pink sweater. Her eyes are a dark green almost reminding me of the forest back in Forks.

I smile, "I prefer Bella, please."

She smiles nodding, "Alright, Bella. Your mom explained that you were living with your father in Forks, Washington when she came for your graduation. She wanted you to fill in the rest."

I sigh, "After I was born my parents didn't get along very well. Renee, she didn't like the small town environment. They split and I lived with mom when she met my step dad, Phil."

She nods scribbling on her paper, "Do you like Phil, Bella?"

I smile nodding, "Phil's great."

She nods, "So how did you end up with your father?"

I shrug, "Phil's a minor league baseball player. Mom was stuck at home with me but I knew she wanted to be with him and being with me made her unhappy. So, I thought I'd move to Forks to stay with my dad, Charlie for a little while. I graduated high school when Renee asked me to apply to college in Florida."

She smiles nodding, "Bella, did you know about our meetings before you received your schedule through the mail?"

I shake my head, "Renee never mentioned it."

She nods tapping the end of her pencil against her chin, "Then why are you so nervous?"

I gave a sarcastic chuckle, "I asked some of my new friends on campus about you. Hillary Millard gave me a pretty good explanation."

She nods her head, "Yes, I worked with Hillary. She was very troubled when she first came to me. She's originally from Maine. She was almost as pale as you, Bella. She was malnourished and jumped at any loud noises. She was grieving for a friend that had gone before her body followed. Hillary resisted my treatment program, which is just talking. I've found the in college students particularly freshman that talking things out and through tend to help more than anything."

I sigh nodding, "What do you want to know?"

She smiles, "Well, first of all, I think we got off to a bad start. My name is Bernice Gregory. I've been working as a counselor here for about seven years. Before, I worked at Mississippi State college. Most of the students I see are troubled students with a past they don't want to talk about. I normally see students twice a week but for new students I demand that the first semester is three times a week. It's normally during the first two or three sessions that I determine if a particular student can be helped through counseling. If not, than I recommend to the parents that a psychologist outside of college will be better suited. In other cases, I tell the parents that there is nothing wrong with their child. Most parents confuse the signs of grief with nerves about their future or college for example. I've had plenty of students that were mistakenly requested for they were just worried about their futures and what college means for them. So, Bella, please this is a session for you. If you have something you want to share than do so. If not, than you may just sit quietly."

I nod attempting to smile, "If I don't say anything you'll automatically assume that something's wrong with me."

Ms. Gregory shakes her head, "I've had a few students that were too tired to say anything. Another few that were cramming for exams. Trust me, Bella, I've had them all. I can tell a lot about a person when they don't speak and when they do speak. The way they sit or the way they say words can give a lot about a person's mental health."

I shrug my shoulders, "I don't have anything to say to you."

She sighs nodding her head, "Bella, you mom explained a few things to me. She told me she's tried all summer long to get through to you, but you won't. Why is that?"

I roll my eyes, "Renee knows that I've always been a silent person. I'm the suffer in silence type. I've always been that way. There's nothing wrong with me. So, I'm becoming like any other teenager around the world. Renee and Charlie are worried which is understandable. I told Renee I would come to her when I was ready. She can't force me to talk about things when I'm not ready to explain myself just yet."

Ms. Gregory nods moving her pencil against her clipboard, "Why do you call your mom Renee and your dad Charlie? Why not mom or dad?"

I shrug my shoulders, "I don't know. I've not been around Charlie long enough. I always call him by dad when I'm around him. Same goes for mom."

She nods a strange solemn look on her face, "Bella, I want to talk about your birthday from last year. There seems to be something that happened. Your mom explained that you were never one to celebrate birthdays but whenever she mentioned your birthday this year, you flinched. Why is that? What happen last year?"

I shake my head a deep frown on my face, "It's no one's business what happened on my birthday. Why are we going this far? I thought counselors were supposed to tread carefully with their patients?"

Bernice smiles sadly, "Renee explained that you are a tough girl to crack. She said that I should try going in head on for the first session. The next few sessions will get easier and easier. She doesn't know exactly what happened to you so she wanted you to explain. Who's the Cullen family, Bella?"

I shake my head pushing myself to my feet, "I think that's enough for today," I whisper barely keeping it together.

I haven't heard that last name aloud in months. I've only ever thought about it but never let myself say it out loud. I grab my backpack from the floor moving toward the door. She stands quickly grabbing my arm, "Bella, what's the matter? What happened?"

My mind runs over the many lies and scenarios that I've thought about. None of them makes sense. The only one that does is the lie they made. The one that the humans wouldn't care about knowing it were true or not.

"Please don't make me. I'm not ready to face it yet."

I'm not ready to face the fact that their…

I shake my head before the thought can finish. I feel her hand retract from my arm before she sighs, "Bella, one of these days you're going to have to talk about it."

I sniff my nose realizing that tears are streaming down my cheeks, "One of these days I'll be ready, but not today."

My fingers wrap around the knob turning and stepping out. Ms. Gregory doesn't try to stop me and I'm grateful. I pull my schedule out from my pocket checking the times. I shake my head turning in the direction of the dorm complex. I sigh stepping outside letting the wind play with my hair.

I wonder if the beach will be any better. I shake my head, the one thing I need right now is a quiet forest with the fresh smell of pine needles. I smile at the memory of the surrounding trees of Charlie's house.

My eyes locate the dorm complex as I jog toward the door. Someone comes out ahead of me and I let them past before I step inside. It's quieter than last night as mostly everyone is in class. I climb the stairs getting to my floor quickly moving down the hallway. A mess of blonde hair stands at my dorm door and I mentally groan, "Rebecca?"

She jumps a pair of shades on her face as she turns around. Her hand is against her chest her palms almost white, "Bella, damn you scared me. Not so good for this insane migraine."

I frown whispering, "Sorry. So are you back for the day or…"

She sighs shaking her head, "I'm grabbing my things and staying with Phoebe for the rest of the day. We both need to get moving after the activities fair yesterday. We got a few new recruits so we need to start coming up with this years play and such. Plus I have classes tonight. I cannot go out in these clothes again. Why aren't you in class? Ditching the first day?" She ends with a smirk as she pushes the dorm door open before stepping inside.

I shake my head following behind her in the room, "Most certainly not. My mom would have a fit. I had counseling this block. It didn't last as long as they hoped."

She nods turning on the lamp by her bed, "I know what you mean. My freshman year I had to talk with Ms. Stevie and that woman did everything quickly. She never was the type to talk for a long time. The others just about force you to stay, though. You did you get?"

I drop my backpack on the bed shrugging my shoulders, "Ms. Gregory."

I collapse on the bed frowning as she drops something from her hands. I don't bother turning over to make sure she didn't break anything. Her footsteps get closer instead of her checking what she dropped, "M-Ms. Gregory? That woman forces you to stay even if she's busy. Hell, I've had friends that finished in ten minutes but she let them study."

I shake my head rolling my eyes, "Yeah, right. They probably didn't want to talk so she sat there watching them as they slept or studied."

Suddenly a weight comes on my bed and I look to see Rebecca sitting on the end of my bed. She smirks all of a sudden, "Did you walk out during a session? Most people don't walk out during the first session."

I shrug my shoulders, "What does it matter anyway? My mom requested her for whatever reason. She was being forceful trying to get stuff out of me. I wasn't about to deal with it so I walked out. If we are old enough to go to college and take care of ourselves than why can't we walk out on a counselor?"

Rebecca chuckles shrugging her shoulders, "I don't know, but I'll give you a piece of advice, Ms. Gregory doesn't normally go in head first. She's know for treading carefully because of sensitive patient. Bella, you just chained yourself with Ms. Gregory for the next year. Normally she fixes things in one semester, you just signed away your life for one whole year. The more you resist her the worse it will get. If you keep on she can tell your parents that you're incapable of dealing with college. You aren't in right mindset. I've seen her do it to countless people that don't deserve it all because they lost their tempers once. Just remember that, Bella. You're in world of hurt with Ms. Gregory."

I groan as Rebecca stands to her feet moving to her side of the room. I can only guess what the rest of the semester will be like now.


	11. 9

9. _**One Month Later **_

The light from the computer bothers my eyes as a yawn explodes from my mouth. I roll my eyes listening to the sounds from the closet behind me shaking my head.

"This just is a disgrace! I can't find anything to wear!"

I sigh, turning around on my rolling chair toward Rebecca standing in front of her closet. She's dressed in a light purple shirt with a pair of shorts hanging around from her waist. Her eyes are scanning her closet as she tries to find some type of dress to where to a party tonight.

Unlike the other parties Rebecca has gone to, this one has most of the campus attending. Unfortunately, I've met both of her boy toys over the last month. She's leaving the dorm with her friend, Wilson, and then once she gets to the she's going with her other "buddy," Victor. Personally, I don't see what all the boys on campus see in her, as her personality is worse than Lauren back in Forks was.

I sigh pushing myself up from my seat moving toward my bedside table grabbing my phone. I've had a few text messages over the last hour from Hillary. Hillary has quickly become my best friend here at the college. I just wish that we were close enough that I could talk to her in a real way. In a way, she reminds me of Alice without the horrible squeal as Hillary is more closed off and reserved unlike my memories of Alice.

I open my phone seeing a text message from Hillary.

_R u sure u don't want 2 attnd the party?_

That's right; Hillary, Stan, and Axel are all attending said party along with Becca. Rebecca hates people using her full name so she uses the nickname Becca.

I sigh rolling my eyes hitting the reply button.

_I'm sure, Hill. Hav fun!_

I send the message along holding the end button effectively turning off my phone. Becca groans once again from her closet causing me to walk toward her. I place my hand on her shoulder effectively scaring her causing her eyes to glare right at me, "Bella, don't do that. I'm already stressed out enough!"

I sigh shaking my head, "What are you going for tonight, Becca? If you can figure that out than it won't be too hard."

She sighs, her eyes saddened. I already know where her mind is going toward and I shake my head, "Becca, why do you try so hard for a guy that doesn't like you in the slightest?"

She folds her arms over her chest shrugging her shoulders, "I don't know, Is. He just does something to me that I can't understand. I love him, Is."

For some reason, unbeknownst to me, Becca started called me Is or Izzy two weeks into the semester. I personally like it considering that no one has ever called me that before.

I shake my head, "I understand that you care about him, Bec, but he doesn't seem to care about you at all. Unlike your friend, Wilson, who worships the ground you walk on."

Her cheeks darken causing me to grin, "You care about Wilson that you don't want to hurt his feelings. I say leave Vic alone and go for Wilson. Wilson loves you and cares about you, Bec. That man would treat you like the goddess you are."

She smiles small at me, "You really think so?"

I chuckle snickering mentally as I nod my head, "Absolutely!"

She grins moving toward her closet, "I know what to wear now. Thanks Bella."

I smile, "No problem."

I return to my computer groaning at the term paper I have yet to finish. Rebecca chuckles from her closet, "Still working on that term paper?"

I roll my eyes holding my chin in my hand, "What do you think?"

She laughs from her spot in front of her closet, "I tried to tell you not to wait until last minute."

I frown guilty, "Technically it's not due until the end of the week…"

Rebecca rolls her eyes as she pulls something from a hanger from her closet, "Bella, it's due in three days. On your birthday, after all."

I sigh remembering the plans that everyone seems to have made for my birthday. Friday happens to be my birthday in which I'll be turning nineteen, which gets me down in the dumps. I've been on high alert for the last week and a half when I checked the calendar for when I term paper was due.

I've had the damn thing for three weeks to work on but I've been in a horrible mood. Things with Mrs. Gregory haven't gotten any better. The only thing I'm grateful for is the fact that she let me have Friday off from counseling. We haven't made any head way as I've stopped walking out on her but I just refuse to talk about what I know she wants to talk about.

I've come up with a few lies to get through the session in which I do confess but my body freezes. I can't even let the names fly from my mouth from the pain that hurts my entire body and mind.

"What have your friends planned for your b-day?" asks Rebecca from her side of the dorm room. She's in her undergarments having showered earlier today and changing from her clothes.

At first, she wanted to stay in her outfit of shorts and sleeveless shirt but after realizing the entire campus was going, she quickly changed her mind.

I shrug my shoulders in response to her question, "They won't say. I told them if they do a surprise party that I won't forgive them at all. I literally hate parties as it is. I'm seriously considering just going to the theater and eating out and just bypassing their plans."

Rebecca chuckles, "I'm sure Axe and Hillary have already set up the party."

I groan shaking my head, "They will literally make me sick if they set up a party, Bec."

She giggles moving toward me already dressed. She guilty frowns, "Axel came to me last week after they found out about your birthday. They did the same thing to a girl last year for her birthday and she had such a bad anxiety attack that she passed out as soon as everyone screamed happy birthday."

I groan shaking my head fiercely, "Thanks, Bec. I most certainly am not going to their party. I'll make up some type of excuse to pass it up."

She nods smiling as she pushes herself to her feet before moving to her desk. I take in her outfit seeing a simple blue flower design strapless dress with a pair of flip-flops on her feet. Her hair is already curled to perfection as she snaps a black beaded necklace around her neck smiling broadly.

She grabs her white and blue bag smiling at me as she twirls, "How do I look, Izzy?"

I smile holding my thumbs in the air, "You look amazing, Becca."

She grins her face lighting up, "I hope Wilson likes it. He always said this was his favorite dress that I own."

I smile as we suddenly hear a knock on the dorm door. Rebecca grins widely moving toward the door pulling it open as I watch her face. Her features fall as she sees her best friend, Phoebe Pikes dressed to the Nile for the party they are both attending.

Phoebe is dressed in a knee length red dress with a black crop jacket and red heels covering her feet. I shake my head watching Rebecca look down at herself sneering before she quickly replaces her smile with a smirk, "Phoebe!"

She opens her arms for Phoebe as they both hug causing me to roll my eyes. How those two became best friends, I haven't a single clue. Phoebe runs all over Rebecca that it just doesn't make any sense why Rebecca hangs out with her all the time.

"Damn, Phoebe you are looking hot!"

Phoebe tosses her dark black hair over her shoulder blowing on her red painted nails, "Oh, I know. I'm looking to get laid tonight."

I shake my head moving to the drawer on my desk locating my headphones as Rebecca grabs her phone from her dresser.

Suddenly Phoebe clicks her tongue on the roof of her mouth, "Becca, honey, what are you wearing? I thought you wanted to get laid tonight not become mother Hubbard herself…"

I hear Rebecca sigh causing me to glance toward them. Rebecca shrugs her shoulders, "I thought I should be comfortable for once. Vic practically ignores me most of the time anyway so what does it matter? I'm done trying to get him to like for more than a good fuck."

Rebecca grins toward me and I smile, "That's good, Becca."

Phoebe rolls her eyes, "If you're going to the party dressed like that, than I'm not talking to you the entire night."

Rebecca rolls her eyes this time, "Whatever, Phoebe. Wilson will hang with me so that's your loss."

Phoebe giggles, "Wilson? That's your date? He's the one that has you past Vic? Damn, I thought you had better sense, Becca. I'll see you later, after you've dropped Wilson for your own good."

Rebecca waves sarcastically toward Phoebe as she walks out the door. Suddenly I hear Rebecca stutter as footsteps approach the dorm door once again. I turn around in my chair to see Wilson standing at the door dressed for the party in a simple red t-shirt, dark blue jeans, and a pair of black sneakers, along with his leather jacket he's been known to where.

I smile as Wilson takes in Rebecca's attire, "Rebecca, you look amazing."

Her cheeks darken as she looks down at her dress, "You don't think it's too simple?"

He shakes his head holding out his arm, "Heavens no, Becca. You look like an angel."

She lowers her gaze toward the floor and I can only hope that they last a long time. Wilson really cares about her and it's plain as day to anyone who looks. Rebecca has feelings for Wilson too, but she's one of those girls that stick to fashion trends and what society says is right. She's never been the type to go against what the worldviews as right or appropriate.

She smiles at him taking his arm before glancing toward me, "Sleep well, Is. Get that term paper done."

I smile nodding as Wilson turns toward me waving, "Hey Bella."

I wave back watching as Rebecca pulls the door closes behind them. I shake my head at their drama. Wilson doesn't see any other girl when Rebecca's around. When she's not around, I can get Wilson to engage in conversation most of the time, but when she enters the room, she's all he cares about.

I remember what that was like but it's been so long now. I can barely remember the sounds his voice or the touch of his skin. Even though his skin was as cold as ice, he always managed to light my skin ablaze.

I sigh returning to my computer hoping to finish this term paper tonight.

I shake my head pulling the dark green shirt down over my stomach. I can hear footsteps just outside my dorm room door "Bella, are you ready?"

I can hear the tired voice of Hillary on the other side of the door. I smile moving toward the door pulling it open to see a sleepy looking Hillary smiling at me, "Are you ready for breakfast?"

I smile nodding my head but I notice she's alone, "Where are the guys?"

She smiles giggling, "Stan drank too much so he's out of commission. Apparently Axel must have found some girl at the party because he didn't come to his room all night."

I roll my eyes moving back in my dorm grabbing my jacket and backpack hearing the light drizzle outside. Hillary leans against the entrance of my dorm catching a yawn as it comes out of her mouth.

"I wonder where all this rain came from…," she mutters under her breath.

I chuckle stepping out of the dorm after grabbing my backpack and jacket, "I might be bad luck for people around here. My birthday at the end of the week might be the reason."

Hillary rolls her eyes snickering, "Oh, please, Bella. Just because you like the rain doesn't mean you're a bad omen for everyone else."

I hold my hands up in surrender hoping that my birthday bracelet doesn't show. We walk down the hallway, down the stairs, and out of the complex quickly entering the cafeteria. My stomach growls at the smell of eggs and pancakes.

Hillary chuckles at me, causing my cheeks to immediately darken, "Sorry about that. I've been up most of the morning before you showed up. That term paper is a killer, I swear it."

Hillary grins, "I tried to tell you. Mrs. Reynolds isn't known for going easy on freshman in literature."

I shrug my shoulders, "I like her class though. She's my favorite teacher. If only she were the counselor instead of Ms. Gregory than we might get somewhere."

Hillary sighs, standing in line beside me to get some food, "You still haven't made any progress?"

I shake my head shrugging my shoulders, "Apparently not. I believe she might try to weasel into getting Renee here during a session. Renee has been calling and emailing me more often as if she knows something."

Hillary nods grabbing a tray behind me, "She did that to me before. Although I confessed to having problems with my father and she had him in the room when I arrived. What was worse was the fact that there were students escorting me to the session so I had no way of walking out. My father and I haven't spoken since because I told him the truth and he didn't like I had to say."

I shake my head pressing the numbers at the lunch woman for free breakfast. Hillary and I find an empty table sliding our trays on top.

"What did she do after that?" I ask opening the butter package for my pancakes.

She sighs, "She told my mother about the session. Mom gave her an ear full and Ms. Gregory called a local psychiatrist for me. She told him all about the problems I was having since I had gotten over my friends death. That's the thing with her. She doesn't just fix that one thing she goes after others that might be making you depressed or whatever. Mom refused to put me there and she basically told the college that she wanted me taken from the sessions. I was no longer suicidal or thinking about my friend. I was better according to mom so she took me out. I heard Ms. Gregory has been talking with my teachers about my performance in class. She doesn't like that I'm quiet and I don't participate in class discussions."

My eyes widen as I pour syrup all over my pancakes. The image of Renee possibly sitting in the counselor's office has my nerves in a sudden vice squeezing on my stomach enough to force the little food back up my throat.

I shake my head, "I hope to god that she doesn't do that to me. I swear I'll go to the office and get out of her sessions."

Hillary nods but sighs, "You can't get out of her sessions. That's why she already has so many write-ups from teachers and parents. Once they believe you're cured they want you out but most of the time it's up to her to decide."

I nod chewing the eggs that came with my pancakes, "Has she ever had a patient that was sent to her sessions by mistake? Like the parents confused the signs of grief with nerves about the future or something like that?"

Hillary nods smiling, "Once, before I came here. It was with a male student his parents had just buried his grandfather. He had just graduated high school and was coming here on a football scholarship. According to what I heard, he was nervous and jittery all the time. She saw him for two weeks at three times a week and let him go after that. He had a lot on his plate with football and his grandfather dying. That's the only person I've heard of that she let go early."

I nod relieved by the story, "Did he graduate from here or is he still here?"

Her eyes downcast toward the floor sighing, "He didn't graduate, Bella. He became depressed shortly after the sessions stopped. He went missing and no one noticed until it was time for holiday break. Ms. Gregory was contacted about his absences from class but she figured he was having trouble adjusting once again and let it go. This was the time when she hadn't been here long and it was hard on everyone at the time for her to get adjusted as well. He's been missing for two years now and there are no leads in his case. Word is Ms. Gregory blames herself for not digging deeper into his mental state. She thinks he went to the cliffs by the beach and jumped committing suicide. Word is that's why she hasn't let another student go from her sessions since."

I shake my head feeling disgusted at the turn of events in the story. We are both quiet from then as we attempt to finish our food before our first class. Suddenly whispers spread through the cafeteria causing Hillary to roll her eyes and me to raise an eyebrow at her, "What's up?"

She shakes her head, "The entire school is all over the fact that Rebecca is with Wilson now. Apparently, Phoebe slept with Vic last night at the party and now she's no longer friends with Rebecca."

My eyes widen as a smile spreads across my lips, "That's terrific. I mean why do they care about what she does anyway?"

Hillary shakes her head gazing at me, "You don't get it do you?"

My eyebrows rise in confusion, "Get what?"

Hillary chuckles shaking her head, "Phoebe has been after Victor for years since Becca got with him. She was only a friend with her to get with Vic. Rumor around campus is that Phoebe slept with him over the course of him sleeping with Becca as well. Another rumor is that Phoebe got pregnant by Vic but Vic made her leave. Vic might have slept with Phoebe last night but his eyes were glued to Becca with Wilson. Phoebe had been telling Rebecca what to wear that would turn Victor off to her."

My eyes widen and I shake my head, "Phoebe is such a bitch."

Hillary nods giggling, "You have not idea just how bad she can be, Bella. Word is that you're next because you're her roommate."

I swallow down my food shaking my head, "She's crazy. What gossip does she have on me?"

Hillary shrugs, "I believe she has a part time job in the office. She can access anyone's file from the cabinetry. I wouldn't be surprised if the entire campuses know about your sessions with Ms. Gregory soon."

I sigh shaking my head finishing my food feeling stuffed. The bell chooses that time to ring causing Hillary and me to quickly stand and drop our trays in the trash.

She smiles sadly at me, "Have fun today, Bella. I'll see you at lunch."

I smile nodding waving toward her. Little did I know, I wouldn't see her again after lunch.

My leg shakes against the tile as other students move toward their next class. I have my sessions with Ms. Gregory today after lunch as I sit in the chair my leg shaking. I have a feeling that she'll force me to talk against my better judgment.

The door opens revealing Ms. Gregory fully dressed in a white dress shirt, dark jeans, and a pair of ankle boots while a simple black sweater covers her arms. She smiles graciously at me, "Come on inside, Bella."

I smile nodding my head at her pushing myself up from the chair. I step inside her office a feeling of déjà vu creeping into my brain of the many times I've stepped into her office. I move toward the familiar leather couch against the farthest wall dropping my backpack toward the floor. I pull on the string at the end of my jacket waiting on Ms. Gregory to take her seat as always. She normally takes her time getting her things together before she takes a seat for us to talk.

"So, Bella how are you today?" she asks grabbing her clipboard and notebook like every other day.

I shrug my shoulders, "Just fine."

She nods her head moving to her chair before taking a seat, "I thought you would be happy today, Bella. It's raining outside."

I roll my eyes, "It's misting outside. I would barely call that rain at all."

She nods seeming to understand where I'm coming from. She writes something down on her clipboard before raising her head meeting my eyes head on.

"Bella, I've been treading careful ever since our first session where you ran out on me. Now I can't keep doing this so I'm going to just go headfirst. Your birthday is this Friday, do you have any plans?"

I flinch at the mention of my birthday but I shake my head, "I heard from my roommate that my friends are trying to do a surprise party but that isn't my thing. I think I'll probably just skip out and try to check out the theater."

She nods, "Bella, why do you not like to celebrate your birthday?"

I mentally groan. Ever since she realized my birthday was so close she's been asking me that question. I wish I had a simple answer for her but I haven't even come up with anything to tell myself.

I lower my gaze toward the floor forcing myself to come to terms with everything. I need to face the fact that I will be growing old and that they aren't coming back. I might wish that they were coming back for me by the things Alice has been doing but it's just my hope getting the better of me. Alice isn't coming for me nor is any other member of their family. It's been over a month now since I began college nothing is going to happen and it's time I face that fact for once and for all.

I sniff my nose alerting Ms. Gregory to the change in my demeanor. She sighs handing me a box of Kleenex as I dab my eyes and wipe my nose. I raise my head looking into her eyes giving her a sad smile, "I think I'm ready to tell you about the Cullen family."

Her eyes light up but she forces her lips to stay straight lined, "That's up to you, Bella. If are ready to share, I'm all ears. I've learned my lesson forcing you to talk to me and that did me no good. I'm not trying to pressure you into anything."

I sigh nodding my head, "I'm ready, Ms. Gregory."

She smiles nodding her head, "Alright, well, I'm all ears. Don't worry about anything you say in here to me today. I have no recording devices and I will not mention anything about what you say in here to anyone unless you give me permission, of course."

I nod, "Alright, well, I moved to Forks, Washington for my junior year like I told you. The Cullen family was a bunch of kids that were adopted. Most of the town thought they were strange because of the kids were together like couples but they weren't related. Mrs. Cullen couldn't have kids so they adopted quite a few. There was only one that wasn't paired up with anyone at the time. During my junior year I met a boy named…"

It was hard to get his name pass my lips. Ms. Gregory smiles at me, "Can you not say his name, Bella?"

I bite my bottom lip shaking my head, "Afraid not. Too many bad memories."

She nods, "Alright, pick a safe word."

I smile nodding my head racking my brain for anything that might help.

"How about Green?"

She giggles nodding, "That's fine. So you met a boy named Green?"

The word sounded all wrong but I could say it plain as day. The word green didn't bring any bad memories as long as I didn't think about the color I would do fine.

"He was in my biology class. He seemed like he didn't like me at all at first. He wasn't in school again after the first day and I thought I ran him off or something. He eventually came back and we started talking. He tried to tell me that he wasn't the nicest person out there and that he wasn't a hero but a bad guy. I guess I was attracted to the bad boy thing. Eventually, Green took me to prom after everything during those short months."

She smiles moving her pen along the clipboard, "What happened after summer?"

I smile remembering our last summer together. I haven't really let myself think about those things for the pain that used to bubble at the surface, but now it's like music to my ears.

"Summer was amazing and at the start of school, we had every class together. My birthday was horrible. I tried to tell them that I didn't want any presents or a party. They threw me a party but I got hurt during the festivities causing Green's father to stitch me up as he was the local doctor at the hospital."

She nods smiling, "What happened, Bella? They seemed like lovely people."

An image of that horrible party comes to my mind forcing me to visualize the outcome of that one event on my life. I wonder if Jasper is still beating himself up over what happened after a year of being away from me.

I sigh lowering my gaze toward the floor, "Green's father got a request at a bigger hospital in California. He packed them away a couple of weeks after my birthday and they all left. Green didn't like lost distance relationships so he just left along with the rest of his family."

She frowns moving her pencil before meeting my eyes, "You never tried to get in touch with them?"

I shrugging my shoulders, "I tried a few times with his sister, Alice."

I was pleasantly surprised that I could say her name just fine without any problems at all. Her name didn't spark any pain just heartache that I couldn't really talk to her.

"I tried her email but she had apparently dropped it as all my emails couldn't leave my inbox. I was tempted to check out California but I tried the hospital and they never moved there. It was a lie I suppose as they didn't want anyone knowing where they moved."

I shrug my shoulders, "So, that's why I don't like my birthday and after he left I went into a deep depression that I can't get out of."

Ms. Gregory frowns her eyes sadden at my tale. I felt a twinge of guilt knowing I lied to her about the truth. I refuse to risk her life from her knowing about the existence of vampires. Then again, she'd probably think I was crazy and send me to a padded cell for the rest of my dreadful existence.

"Why did you go into a depression, Bella?"

I sigh, feeling completely drained for this session. I glance up toward her face but instead of seeing her face, I'm transported into a memory.

_It's summer vacation and we are sitting in the meadow just gazing at the light blue sky above._

_I hold his freezing cold hand in mine tracing the lines along the palm of his hand. He sighs in contentment gazing at the sky, "The clouds have it so easy. They can just sit above all of us playing with the rain drops all the time."_

_My eyebrows rise as I sit up gazing at his face, "Where did that come from?"_

_He shrugs sheepishly, "Emmett was watching the weather last night. I needed to know if it was going to be sunny today. It was just a thought, Bella."_

_I shake my head rolling my eyes, "That was one weird thought, Edward. Personally, I rather have a life down on this earth than be a simple cloud in the sky. Didn't ever think that the clouds don't like having to flood places or have severe weather?"_

_Edward's eyes downcast, "I should have thought about that. I guess those clouds have more in common with me than I thought."_

_I roll my eyes pushing myself up to my feet, "Edward, please, if you value my feelings at all than you will not finish that statement. There are times when I wish that you could just read my mind for once. Then you could see how absolutely spectacular you are. You're my angel, Edward."_

_He scoffs, "I'm not an angel, Bella. Far from it."_

_I roll my eyes, "Angels have a hard time to ya know. Just please Edward humor me for a little while."_

_He smiles at me with that one smile he knows that takes my breath away in seconds. I lower myself to my knees in front of him smiling as he comes closer. Today is one of those days where he's more reserved and laid back than any other time._

_He presses his lips against mine setting my skin ablaze and causing my heart to beat erratically in my chest. He pulls away too quickly in my opinion but I smile lovingly at him. Suddenly his cell rings causing us both to mutter, "Alice."_

_We both laugh as he hits ignore on the phone before lying back on the ground watching the clouds form other bizarre shapes._

Tears stream down my face as the memory fades out. I had completely forgotten about that day. I hadn't let myself think about those types of things in so long that I can barely stand it now that I remember it. I blindly reach down grabbing my backpack from the floor pushing myself to my feet before moving quickly toward the door of her office, "I'm sorry, Ms. Gregory, but I have to go. I can't…"

I break off, the emotions becoming too much to deal with. I turn the knob of the door stepping into the hallway and running down the hallway before she can stop me. I lower my pace to walking as I step outside in the misty air.

I don't want to go to my dorm where Rebecca is no doubt waiting on me. She'll harass me about running out during a session once again. My eyes move against the surrounding buildings to see a small wooded area. An intense feeling of Forks comes to me as I realize I miss the smell of the pine needles of the forest. I smile quickly moving toward the wooded area stepping into the tree line.

There is a very dense small trail for people to follow but I take a detour. It's as if my legs already know where to go as I trudge along the moss covered ground remembering the day of treading through the forest with him to see what he looked like in the sun.

I shake my head removing my mind from those memories. My legs suddenly come to a stop and I see a small open space. I turn my head able to still see the light from the campus so that I don't get lost out here. I pull my backpack from my back taking a seat on a huge log smiling at the familiar smell of pine needles.

I sigh opening my backpack pulling out a small change purse. I unzip the top reaching inside and pulling out the picture that brings sadness to my entire body. The tears come out even worse as I drop the picture the emotions too much as I haven't let myself deal with this loss.

I slide from the log to the ground pulling my legs tighter against my chest. Sobs breaking through my lips letting the entire wooded area hear my cries. Sometime during my pity-party, I lay on the ground the stress and exhaustion forcing my eyes to close and sleep to take me.


	12. 10

10.

Sometime later, my hand scrapes over my cheek as the feel of ice-cold water hits my skin. My eyes flutter open trying to push against the sleep crust caking my eyes. I stretch my arms above my head rubbing my eyes hoping to look around me.

The first clue I have that I am not in my room at college is the ground. My back is stiff and aching from the rough sticks and log against my back. I sit up, my eyes finally opening to see all around me. I can feel my eyes widening at the dark landscape ahead of me.

My hands slide down the side of my leg coming into contact with sticks and leaves. Suddenly another drop of water falls down hitting my face and I groan.

_'Where the hell am I?'_ I begin to wonder.

I turn my head hoping to find something I might have brought with me. My mind is still slightly hazy from my sleep and it will take me a few minutes to get my bearings again. My hands touch something soft telling me it's not of forest origin. I slither my fingers up the material realizing it's my backpack.

I grab it pulling one strap over my shoulder as I push myself up to the top of the log behind me. I turn my head both ways hoping to see a way out of here or something.

Suddenly I close my eyes feeling drowsiness seep into my body. I yawn, my eyes already droopy as I push myself to my feet. Suddenly my eyes adjust to the darkness and I remember what transpired before I came into the trees.

I groan shaking my head muttering, "Stupid. So stupid, Bella."

Suddenly the drizzle becomes more pronounce and a harsh wind accompanies it. The rain doesn't come down harder just lightly but with the wind, it feels as if tiny slices of glass are slicing against my skin. I sigh trying to see ahead of me.

Suddenly I hear the crack of a tree limb. My eyes widen and my pulse quickens. My skin suddenly chills to the bone and bumps arise along my skin. A shiver breaks through my body as my breath comes out in pants. I hate when anxiety takes control of my body and all my motor functions break or stop working correctly.

The forest is dark. I can't even see my hand in front of me. The hair on the back of my neck stands up telling me there is something out here with me. I can practically smell the terror in wind.

I tug my jacket over my hands hoping to cover from the harsh wind. My backpack is heavy again with books that weren't even used for class today. The books inside aren't helping me to get through his forest. Why the hell did I decide to come in these woods in the first place?

It was simple. I missed Forks. I missed the forest smell. The silence of the woods with only the sounds of the birds and the leaves to fill my ears. Nothing is the same here. The sun is too hot. There aren't enough cool days. I want to go back home. Florida isn't my home, it never will be.

I roll my eyes trying to see a shimmer of light. I don't recall walking this far into the woods when it was daylight. I just walked a couple feet into the tree line the last I remember. I groan pulling my phone from my pocket. I didn't get along completely with my roommate, Rebecca. To be honest the girl is somewhat of a slut. She had a different boy in her bed all the time. She had night classes while I had classes during the day. I just hope that she and Wilson actually stay together. Victor needs to learn to stay away from her and let her live her life. The only good thing was she was about to leave the college for another university that had the better classes for her degree.

I flip the phone open checking the time.

_9:56pm_

I have been out here for hours. Rebecca should be in her last class of the night and probably attend a party afterward. She wasn't any help right now. I glance up at the battery life and groan. The battery is in the dark red telling me it is about to go dead. To top things off I have no service.

I groan looking around. I am lost. It is obvious. I am lost in a forest close to my college. No matter what I do, I am lost. I can't change that. I am a complete danger magnet. My ex vampire boyfriend left me so I leave for college only to get lost in the forest by my college. I won't be surprised if I am murdered here tonight.

I sigh and start walking again. I hate walking in the forest. It is never easy for me walking in the forest. My feet trip over almost everything. That's when I hear it. I hear the snap of a tree limb again when I stop frustrated.

My eyes widen as I hear the wind whoosh. I freeze in place. I can't move an inch. I could smell something sticky sweat almost like iron. I knew the smell in that instant. The smell of blood. I didn't know whose or what's blood it could be. I just knew it was blood.

I had the sickening suspension that the blood is my own. I am quite clumsy and tripping over tree limbs isn't going to change that part about me.

I am still frozen in pure fear. I suddenly stand erect causing my backpack to fall to the ground. A growl fills the air causing a gasp to come from my throat. I turn on my heel and run as quick as I can. I know I am not fast enough. Deep in the back of my mind, I knew what was chasing me. A vampire.

I already know it's probably Victoria here to finish me off. It took her a little while to find me but I'm sure it's her. Enacting her revenge on him, the only way she knows how. A mate for a mate.

I probably won't survive the night. Forget college, forget forks, forget Renee, and forget Charlie. Tonight, I will probably die or change into a vampire. Neither one seem like a great thing. I remember a time when I once wanted to become a vampire. It was because I didn't want to grow old and leave him. I refused to leave him behind because I loved him. Now, if I were a vampire, it would be a death sentence. To live forever and never see my true love again.

I gasp running as the sound gets closer. I can feel the tears streaming down my cheeks. The wind is hot against my face now. It is warm now but the little drops of rain was still chilling me to the bone. I quickly dodge another tree limb grateful for my speed.

I am prolonging the inevitable. No matter what I did, this vampire was probably going to kill me. I force my legs to stop. My running was probably fun for this vampire. I had read so many things about vampires loving the chase and the hunt. James loved the chase. It was something that he liked about me. He would stop at nothing to protect me and that made the hunt more enjoyable.

I close my eyes sucking in a deep breath before I turn around. The forest is still pitch black in front of me. I can't see anything. There are no sounds.

I gasp before I yell, "If you want me, have me! I'm not going to run anymore, it's hopeless, right? Nothing I do will change this, I should have known!"

I hear the chuckle. It was feminine and sounds old, "You're right, running is useless."

The voice was a little childlike as if they had been changed too early in their young life. I wouldn't be surprised to hear that they were changed during a time when people didn't understand the strange or the different.

I saw the ray of light causing me to pull my hand to block it from my eyes. I saw a glimpse of blonde hair and red eyes before I felt the pain. She grabs me by the neck pushing my head back and I felt her teeth graze my skin.

Her voice was like bells as she spoke in my ear, "You have spunk. I believe you'll make an intriguing immortal."

My eyes widen at her revelation and I'm about to scream and shout begging her to end my life. I can't deal with an eternity alone dealing with this pain of a broken heart.

I feel her sink her teeth into my neck sending my body to the ground. She is strong; I'll give her that. I let myself remember everything from my life. Even that awful day in the woods that put me on this destructive path to meeting this red eye blonde hair vampire.

She was still sucking the blood from the vein in my neck as I lay withering on the ground in sever pain. I could only catch a glimpse of her face but she seemed to be in complete ecstasy at the pure taste of my blood. Suddenly I heard a faint voice from behind this female vampire.

I caught a look at his face to see a young boy but his eyes were the darkest red I have ever seen. He appears at the side of the female caressing her back.

"Sister, Aro would not approve of this…" I hear him murmur.

She groans dropping my body toward the forest floor. I watch her as my eyes are stuck in one position. She glares toward the boy as he suddenly leans over gasping and groaning for air, "I do not care what Aro thinks. He's constantly making his own vampires. I would like to create my own for once."

The boy stops groaning in a flash he's a few feet away from us, "I sure hope that she doesn't cause trouble."

The blonde vampire turns her head toward me a smirk spreading across her lips, "What's the fun in that? I'm sure she'll cause plenty of trouble. I'm so bored in that castle that she will be a welcome liberty from that hellhole."

The boy shakes his head suddenly his eyes cast toward my face. My body is in a lock position as the fire begins to swim through my veins.

"Why can't you just drain her, sister? Her blood is most appetizing…"

The girl flashes beside him her eyes starring at his face in wonderment, "She's immune to my gift, brother…"

The boy's eyes suddenly widen and he shakes his head, "You're mistaken, sister."

Her glare is fiercer than before as she turns toward me her eyes glazing as she stares at me. A few seconds past before the boy places a hand on her shoulder, "That's enough."

She blinks turning toward him, "We should investigate this ourselves."

The boy shakes his head, "We will leave her with the rules of this world and leave. Aro is expecting us back home soon. We only came to this country because of those armies in Texas. It's time we get to Canada before Aro comes for us himself."

The girl sighs shaking her head, "It's a pity. She sure tasted better than she smelt."

The boy chuckles, "I'm sure she did, sister. I wouldn't be surprised if she were someone's singer."

_How right you are…_

The girl snickers once before turning toward her brother, "Let's leave her. I'm sure she can figure it out on her own. Let's check in with the Alaska coven and get home. I'm a little homesick now."

The boy nods smiling, "I'm sure Demetri has already taken care of the other situation."

The girl smiles again but I can see a hint of danger at the look on her face, "I'm sure that's not the last we'll be hearing from this. Did he find anyone useful?"

The boy sighs regretfully shaking his head, "I'm afraid not. He called Aro and they were destroyed as nothing was spectacular."

The girl frowns her face becoming closed off, "Well doesn't that but a damper on everything…"

The boy chuckles showing his row of shiny teeth, "I'm sure there will be plenty more where that came from, sister. Let's go before Felix gets restless."

The girls turning around and flashing by my side and glancing toward the boy, "Brother, help me here. I'm sure I might have taken more blood than necessary."

The boy shakes his head flashing on my other side. They each grab a wrist and before I know it their teeth sink in my skin. I gasp my resolve slowly weakening trying to force out the scream.

I don't see them leave because the fire beneath my skin wages on stronger than ever before. The dizziness seeps into my brain from the loss of blood as I let myself leave the world of the living.

Before I closed my eyes I let myself say his name one last time, _**"Edward."**_

I'm not sure how long the fire burn just beneath my skin and in my veins. It was like a never-ending burn in the inside of my body. I was sure I would die from burn but I never felt my body leave the earth. I was barely aware of the ground beneath me as I tried to keep a lip on my screams. It was hard to keep the screams to myself as the fire waged inside me.

During this time of the never-ending fire, I thought about my life. I thought about my old friends back in Forks and even my new friends here in Florida. The last person I thought about was my counselor. I wonder if any of them know I'm missing yet. Has Rebecca noticed my absence yet? Does Ms. Gregory know I went into the forest after our talk and never came back?

It was all too much to deal with as the fire scorched my veins. I hadn't realized that when the blonde vampire girl had broken my arm as she held me to her body. She even broke a couple fingers as she held my wrist gorging in the blood from my veins.

Unfortunately, the fire continues to burn and I block it out going into my happy place. My happy place with him as we are both equals now.

Ms. Gregory's POV

_**Two Days Later**_

I sat in my office going over my clipboard for my next student. My handwritten notes offer little help in consoling this patient. My eyes flicker toward a folder sitting on my desk causing me to sigh as I exchange the folders.

I rub my fingers along the name on the side of the folder.

_Isabella Marie Swan_

I shake my head the emotions becoming hard to take. Bella has been missing for two days now. Her friend, Hillary Millard, and her roommate, Rebecca Dawson, reported not having seen her after class. I had taken it upon myself to check with her teachers that she would have seen after our session.

None of them had seen her all day. Her birthday is tomorrow and we've already contacted the local police. They were no help saying that the best they could do was call her parents and file missing person's report. Only until then could we gather a search party to find Bella.

I have to sinking suspension that she might have ventured off into the forest close to the college. Bella has the tendency to get hurt or lost quite frequently as her mother has told me. Renee is quite eccentric, as I've met her even before I met Bella. Her husband Phil seems to keep her in line more than anyone else can. Parents aren't easy to console when their child has gone missing for a couple of days. Renee and Bella's father, Charlie, have been calling the main office at all hours trying to find anything they can about Bella.

Rebecca, Hillary, Axel, and Stanley have all been doing shifts of coming to the main office for any information. They learnt fairly quickly that if they wanted to lean anything at all they needed to come to my office. Bella was my patient so I will keep people informed on any progress made in the days past or to come.

I open the file hoping yet again to find any type of clue. Bella is quite a reserved person only talking with me about things she knows won't upset her. I obviously went too far in our last session to get anything out of her. I hate myself for going that far.

I smile at a picture her mom sent to me before she went to Forks for her junior year in high school. It's a shame other teenagers aren't like her as she went somewhere else away from her friends and family to please her mother. She was trying to make her mother happy while not caring for her own happiness.

The picture shows a livelier Bella but even I can tell that the sparkle in her eyes is not there. I remember the last time I saw her how her eyes sparkled as she talked out the love that she lost. It is obvious that this green person is her first love and teenagers never forget their first love no matter how much time has past.

Her mother, Renee, doesn't quite understand Bella's behavior toward this process. I know Bella needs help but she has the type of personality that will only talk when ready. I've tried to talk with Renee about this but she says it's not right. Bella barely hung out with anyone during her senior year and it was tough on her father. I've heard from Charlie about the night terror's she endured.

I wasn't lying when I told Bella that I wanted to hear everything from her and not her family. If I heard from them the story of what happened I would already have a preconceived notion about her and that's not what I want. Hearing from her side, I feel compassion toward her and sympathy, which is what I need to feel in order to get through to her.

I close the folder letting it fall to my desk. I push myself to my feet grabbing my bag and keys walking out of my office. With Bella missing, I have an entire free hour. I step out of my office locking the door behind me walking down the hallway. The walls show the drama club performance for next week showing the beginning of the year.

It's only been a month that Bella's been here but that doesn't change anything. She's already made an impression on everyone at the college. I turn stepping into the main office smiling at Joanne, "Hey Jo, any news today?"

I've come in here every day since Bella's disappearance asking the same question. The principal will be the first one to know if the police have begun their investigation.

She sighs, her eyes flickering around the room. I stand in front of her at sign out book signing my name and checking the time before writing it down on the book.

"Actually, some detective came around this morning. He talked to the principal for a couple of hours. All I know is that he's supposed to check with teachers and her dorm. Her parents have been notified already."

My eyes light up as I sigh, "How she hasn't told me?"

Joann lowers her gaze sighing, "She was supposed to get around to it. I haven't a clue what goes on in her office anymore, Bernice."

I sigh shaking my head, "Where is the detective?"

Joann smirks, her lips showing her shiny row of upper teeth, "He's in the cafeteria. He was talking with her friends during lunch. I was told he was supposed to check your office after lunch."

I groan nodding my head glancing toward the sign-in book. Suddenly I hear a pair of boots enter the main office as I turn my head. I see a man dressed in a beige coat, white dress shirt, jeans, with a belt holding a shiny detective badge.

He steps toward Joann smiling, "Miss, where is Bernice Gregory? I just checked her office and she wasn't there."

Joann giggles smiling as her eyes flicker toward me as I smile, "That would be me, sir."

The man turns his head his eyes looking me up and down, "You're Isabella Swan's counselor?"

I nod frowning, "Yes, I was the one to contact the police when she was missing after a day."

He nods sighing, "I'm afraid we couldn't do anything until she was missing for forty eight hours. Standard policy for college kids. Are you sure she hasn't just gone away for a few days with a friend you don't know about?"

I shrug my shoulders following him out of the office, "Let's talk in my office. These kids are too nosy."

He chuckles nodding, "My name is Adam, Adam Melvin. Detective assigned to Isabella's case."

We finally get to my office as I pull out my keys again unlocking the door. We step inside and I shut the door back. I point toward the chair in front of my desk for him to sit as I place my bag on my desk taking a seat in the huge leather chair.

"So, Ms. Gregory, how long have you been counseling Ms. Swan?"

I sigh, "First of all, she prefers Bella to anything. Second, there is a chance she might have escaped for a few days with a friend. I wouldn't have any possible clue as to where she might be is that was the case. In my personal opinion from the month I've counseled her, she does not seem like the type of person to make people worry about her in that type of way."

Detective Melvin nods before pulling out a small pocket notebook, "What exactly were you treating her for?"

I sigh shaking my head, "That's private. I promised Bella that I wouldn't talk about it with anyone else."

He frowns shaking his head, "Would you tell me if she was suicidal?"

I lower my gaze, "According to her mother there might be that chance. Detective, Bella Swan was showing signs of grief because she went through something traumatic. I shouldn't have pushed her that far and that I was my mistake, but I am confident that she no longer feels that way about herself."

He nods glancing down at his notepad, "Do you have any idea where she might be?"

I glance toward the windows of my office. There is a decent size wooded area that has been known to capture a few travelers on their way. If anyone walks past the trail, they will easily get lost, "We haven't searched the grounds yet. There might be a chance that she could be lost out there."

Detective nods but sighs, "It doesn't seem that deep or far out though. She should have been able to find her way out by daylight."

I nod coming to that conclusion as well, "It's possible. A few students have gotten lost in there before but were out by morning. There might be a chance she woke during the night got even more lost."

Detective nods, "I guess I could get a search party out here. We can search the grounds for wherever she may be."

I smile, "That would be terrific. Do you think we should check any buildings just in case she got locked inside one and can't get out? A few buildings don't have cell service. Her phone might be dead."

Detective nods smiling, "That sounds great. Let's get started."

_**Bella's Birthday**_

Unfortunately, we found no signs of her in the forest or on campus. Detective Melvin had to contact Renee and her father, Charlie with the news. The best we had managed to find was a notebook in the forest by a log. Bella's name was written on the flap but gave no other signs of where she might be.

It was her birthday and her friends were holding a memorial service in the auditorium. Detective Melvin was going to leave the case open and ongoing until a more significant sign of death was found. Most of the police were under the impression that she had left and wanted away from prying eyes, but I knew something was wrong.

Renee and Phil were attending the service today while her father, Charlie stayed in Washington. It was hard to talk with Renee about her daughter's disappearance. I had already enrolled most of Bella's friends into my counseling program hoping to help both them and myself. Unfortunately, since Bella was the second student to go missing after my session the school was investigating.

No one knew where Bella was or she were still alive. All I hope is that I can find some sign of life. I pull my shirt down over my stomach pushing myself to my feet. I sigh grabbing my bag and smiling at Detective Melvin before following him out of my office toward the memorial service for Bella.

Bella's POV

I began to notice the fire lowering around my body. It wasn't as hot for strong as it had been to start with. I could feel it leave the tips of my fingers and the tips of my toes. Unfortunately, the fire built up in my chest and my heart began to beat harder than ever before.

I wanted to scream, to shout, anything to relieve the pain and beg for help. I knew what was happening, but didn't want it. I thought of Alice and the possibility that she had seen this. That she already knew what my future entails. I curse the wind and god almighty for not coming to this conclusion to begin with.

The fire burns strong ever before and I can feel my fingers finally moving. I claw at the ground as my heart beats so fast almost as if, it will beat right out of my chest. The fire retracts as my heart beats once, twice, three times, before it stops forever.

When I open my eyes, I'm not sure how time has gone by. My neck is stiff from the position I held the entire time and the remembrance of the fire scorches at the outer edge of my subconscious. I glance around my eyes widening at the look of everything me. I glance toward a tree and I can see every single layer of bark right down to the root, the rainbow from the shimmer of light. I sit raising my hand to touch the rainbow when my skin suddenly shimmers like tiny diamonds imbedded within my skin.

A huge smile comes to my face as I quickly stand to my feet. I move faster than expected as I grin laughing aloud. My voice is different more like wind chimes on a windy day. I suddenly look around me for my things when I notice I'm no longer in the same place I was. Sometime during the burning, I barely remember being moved or transported.

The only time the burn was worse when I was moved or tilted slightly. I locate my backpack moving toward it. I sigh realizing I need to get a grip as I carefully open my backpack. Nothing's missing from my books but notebook I remember having before the burn is gone.

I search my pockets for my now dead cell phone. I locate it in my pants pocket along with a piece of folded paper.

I quickly unfold it my eyebrows arched.

Bella,

Welcome to the world of immortality. I'm sure you know what you are by the burn you now feel in your throat. There are rules, don't feed inconspicuously or let the human world know what you are. Break any of these rules and you are punished by death. We hope to see you in Italy one day.

There is no signature telling me who did this to me. I wonder if those two vampires are in conspiracy with Victoria to kill me or something. Maybe she wants me to be a vampire because she knows I'm no longer with my mate. She knows that he wouldn't want me to be a vampire. A soulless monster.

I shake my head realizing I need to feed. Hopefully, I can find some type of animal to feed on and get back to campus. I know I can't attend college anymore and the entire campus probably thinks I'm dead since there's no chance that a search party would have come out this far or known where to find me.

I pull on my backpack grinning as my skin continues to shimmer in the sunlight. I just hope that I can get some clothes and be on my way. My eternity starts today.

I giggle turning around and running for a popular hunting ground. I just hope that I can find some meat-eating animal that will taste more human.


	13. 11

11.

It is amazing the speed I posses as a vampire. I run faster than any speeding bullet. I am positive that if any human did a test of how fast I am against a speeding bullet, I would win. I run through the trees my skin sparkling in the sunlight as I try to figure out a local forest that might be close enough. I realize that I'm going to have to run across state borders in order to find something to feed on.

As I run, I notice how easy it is to dodge things at last minute. I always used to wonder how **he **was able not to hit anything. I grin, speeding up jumping over a huge ravine. My eyes widen as I fly in the air landing over the other side. The entire ground shakes almost as if an earthquake has struck and trees crack around me.

I look around the surrounding area screaming out. I am so surprised by the world around me that I can barely handle anything. I take off again passing trees again turning my head making out the signs along the passing interstate. I hit the border passing into Georgia quickly sticking to the surrounding trees.

I make it to a local forest park coming to a screeching halt. I sigh realizing that I don't need to breathe but not breathing is uncomfortable. I shake my head a burn registering in my mind toward the back of my throat. I reach up toward my neck feeling the burn get worse than before. I quickly pull off my backpack and jacket the feeling of being hot getting to me.

I know that I'm probably only feeling the effects of being thirsty. Being thirsty is what **he **told me that was the worst of being what he is.

I finally get rid of the bulky coat finding a decent place to put all of it in hole inside a tree. I glance around once I'm finished sensing something isn't right. Suddenly a strong gust of wind breaks through right past me bringing along the sweetest and delicious thing I've ever smelt and it registers to my brain.

Before I can process the scent, I'm running through the forest running toward the smell. I notice the flowers blooming all around me but they barely register toward my already possessed mind. I begin to notice camping signs all around me telling me I've entered a human camping ground.

Something in the back of my mind tells me that this isn't right. Something is very wrong, but I keep running barely slowing or showing any signs of hesitance. I come to stop hiding behind some trees before my eyes widen seeing the family of three. A young girl no older than six is skipping around the tent as her parents continue trying to get it to sit up in the ground.

The father is big and strong, but it's not he that has me in a serious hunger fest. I turn my head toward the woman seeing her protruding stomach. The mother is pregnant at probably four or five months. I shake my head suddenly coming down from the hunger high that I just experienced.

I stop breathing pushing past the uncomfortable feeling before taking off faster than a bullet yet again. I run as far out of human territory that I can. I squeeze my fingers toward my palm shaking my head at my stupidity. I can't be that careless anymore. That was the best scent I've ever smelled but I can't make a mistake like that again.

I come to stop about at least forty or fifty miles away. I turn my head to see trees all around me feeling as if I'm lost. I'm not really lost, as my vampire mind seems to work faster. I can hear further out knowing exactly how far the closest interstate is where huge eighteen wheelers are speeding down the black tar road. I step closer to the tree still holding my breath as I lean against it hoping the tree will disguise the scent slightly if any at all.

I hope in the back of my mind that I can hold myself here in this spot incase that smell comes toward my nose again. I close my eyes, grabbing the branch of the tree, and carefully take a deep breath in my mouth. The air doesn't taste polluted with the alluring scent as of yet.

I keep the breath in my mouth as I carefully allow myself to smell once again. The scents of the forest are all that remain around me. I breathe a sigh of relief that I got away without killing someone. I don't believe I could live with that on my conscious. I decide to close my eyes and branch my senses out as I breathe in the smell of the surrounding forest. This time I'm more careful as I listen around me.

I can hear birds at the top of the trees, squirrels fighting over an acorn, a spider wrapping their prey in their web, and last a herd of deer approaching a small creek. My eyes snap open and suddenly before the thought can be processed, I'm running through the forest pinpointing the location of the deer.

I stand between two trees my eyes trained directly on the three deer in front of me. One deer is smaller of the three as the bigger ones are on high alert. They each have white tails but the biggest one has huge antlers on the top of his head. I know now that this must be a family of deer trying to make sure the smaller one gets something to drink from the stream directly in front of them.

Unfortunately, I know once I attack one of the deer, the rest will scatter. Suddenly I hear a hiss from a little bit away from this herd of deer. I turn my head spotting much bigger animal with a scent much more appetizing than the deer directly behind me.

The animal looks like a cougar from my many fading human memories of the animal planet. As I look closer taking in the creamy white underbelly, black tips on the tail and ears, and the much smaller in size to normal cougars, do I begin to realize this isn't a cougar but a panther. His hiss doesn't alert the small group of deer in the slightest as he creeps up a huge bolder his eyes directly on the small herd.

I begin to change my strategy and direct my hunt toward this bigger better smelling meal. I stand there watching the panther as he watches the deer his eyes directly pointed toward the two smaller deer of the group. The antlers of the male deer will get in the panther's way of his meal.

I decide to force my attack early as he stands to his feet letting out a growl loud enough to panic the deer. I move quickly jumping in the air catching the panther mid-jump in my arms. His fur was soft and he felt like the softest material I've ever felt in my entire existence.

His growls and pleas mean little to me as he begins trying to claw me. The claws are like gentle caresses for all the effort was in defeat. My skin is hard and he can't puncture my skin as I smirk at him forcing him against the ground.

I lose track of the herd of deer mildly hoping they had managed to escape. I let my instincts take over as I quickly bite into his jugular. The flow of red liquid fills my mouth as I mentally sigh at the taste feeling the animal finally give up and let me drain his life.

He runs dry before I'm even half way full. I frown pushing his dead carcass away from me in disappointment. How can I still be thirsty after all of that? I guess that's the effects of being a newborn vampire. I turn my head around me hoping that I'll hear something else to fill me up. I sigh pushing myself to my feet staring down at the carcass realizing that I'll need to dispose of this creature.

I finally look down gasping at the remnants of my shirt. That is if it can even be considered a shirt anymore. The claws of the panther found no place of rest upon by body but my shirt is the true victim. I shake my head picturing Alice standing over me glaring and shaking a finger at me.

_"That poor shirt! What did the shirt ever do to you, Bella? Huh?!"_

I leave the shirt on in order to deal with the dead panther. I reach down grabbing the panther as if it weighs absolutely nothing. I can barely feel its weight as I carry it over my shoulder running through the forest. I come to a stop in a decently big area and drop the carcass down on the ground. I squat down cupping my hands only hoping that this will work in my favor.

I begin digging into the ground quickly using my super speed and strength. The earth cracks and recedes as a pile of dirt begins to pack directly behind me. I come to a stop noticing the hole is big enough for the body of the panther. I jump out of the hole realizing I might have dug a little too deep.

I grab the carcass of the panther dragging it toward the hole and letting it fall into the hole. I quickly decide that I need to hunt a few more animals and add those bodies into the hole before plugging it back up.

I take off running through the forest hoping to find something else to feed on.

I feel full finally after three decent size deer before I run toward where I left my backpack and jacket. I glance up toward the sky realizing that it's a few hours into the afternoon. My skin shimmers in the sunlight as if small diamonds are embedded into my skin.

I locate the tree holding my things and quickly grab my jacket hoping that it will cover my chest. My shirt is completely ruined but I'm thankful that the three deer didn't have the claws to make it worse. I pull off my shirt balling it up and grabbing my jacket stuffing my arms into the sleeves.

I quickly zip up the front pulling the hood over my head. I begin thinking about where I'm going to go. First thing's first, I have to get into the college. It probably won't be easy and I'll need to be sneaky as they've probably already considered me missing or possibly dead since they didn't find me in the woods.

I grab my backpack unzipping the top and reaching inside. Hopefully, I can find out just how long I've been missing and that will give me some sort of idea what might be going on at the campus. I find my planner opening to the marker from the last time I looked in here.

I run my fingers over the dates.

_Sept 11th_

_Sept 12th_

_Today: Sept 13th_

My eyes widen and my hand comes to my mouth. Today is my birthday and if I were still human, I would be nineteen today. I shake my head dropping it into my backpack carefully zipping the top back. My hand slides against the material of my backpack my eyes catching the flicker of light on my bracelet.

I grin my memory moving to a figure of Alice dressed to the Nile in front of me, _"Happy Birthday, Bella!"_

I chuckle shaking my head and dropping my hand pulling my backpack over my back, "I stopped aging three days ago, Alice."

I can just imagine her rolling her eyes at me but wanting to celebrate it anyway. I shove those thoughts to the back of my head realizing that I have so much more room inside my head. I can think about three or maybe a million things at once without feeling whiplash or a headache.

I shake out my shirt noticing the slight drops of blood that are on the shirt. Maybe this will work in my favor. I can use this shirt in the area of the college so that Renee, Phil, Charlie, and all my friends both here in Florida and back in Forks will have some relief. They will assume that some panther in the area killed me so that might work in my favor.

I turn on my heel running back the way I came. I stick to the wooded areas considering my skin is still slightly sparkling since my hands are free to the world. I run through the last ends of Georgia entering Florida once again. I'm surprised at just how fast I make it to the area outside of the college.

I walk through the surrounding forest area listening carefully to any humans in the woods. I can't hear anything but I can tell this area has been messed with. The earth under my feet has new footsteps that follow each other and the area is still strong of human blood.

The fragrance brings a scorching new fire to my throat. I grip my throat feeling the fire worst than before when I first fed from the panther and the deer. I'm frozen stock still in the middle of the wooded area my thirst the worst I've felt yet. I attempt to stop breathing in the tainted scent of the appetizing blood hoping that my instincts will go away.

Suddenly the scent gets stronger as I ears pick up the crunch of leaves a few feet from the edge of the tree line.

"Victor, can you believe this? It's so tragic about her."

My fading human memories locate a blurry face of a human girl by the name of Phoebe Pikes. The ex-best friend of Rebecca, the one girl I've really come to hate more than Rebecca herself.

"Don't worry, babe. I'll protect you. We should get back inside for the memorial."

The voice of Victor follows her along through the forest. My anger flares for a split second as I realize even my emotions are now heighten. Victor is with Phoebe in the forest talking about my disappearance. Unfortunately, my thirst is even stronger now along with my emotions at the fact that these two are together.

I keep still not wanting to risk any movement setting off my instincts for hunting. I close my eyes listening to them. I hear them walking through the rest of the forest. The sounds of their hands moving against each other, their feet crunching leaves and sticks in their way, and the unforgettable sounds of their hearts beating in sync all enter my ears.

Suddenly everything changes. I hear the skip of the beat of her heart before she falls. Her yelp from her rosy red lips as she hits the ground and the simple echo of her pants giving way as she hits a rock breaking the fabric of her pants.

My eyes glaze over with venom and before I can stop myself, I break into a run. The familiar scent of human blood covers my mind in an alcoholic type haze. I can barely hear her groan from the pain in her knee as Victor reaches down wiping her tears and checking her knee.

"Looks like it's bleeding a little bit, Phoebe."

She moans and I hear her reaching for Victor's hand to pull herself up. I wish I could stop as I don't want to hurt these innocent humans but I'm young and the thirst rules my entire body and mind.

I stop against a couple of trees peering at them. My sense of smell gets stronger as the scent of human blood assaults my senses. Phoebe bends her knee looking down at her knee and that's when I get my first look at her bleeding knee.

The blood isn't very bad, not dripping down, but more like a scrape against her knee. My eyes narrow at the sight of the bleeding scraped knee as Phoebe rubs her finger along her knee the blood staining the tip of her finger. The sight sets my mind ablaze with thirst and I can't stop myself.

I run toward them stopping just ahead of them catching them by surprise.

"Bella?!" they both gasp their eyes wideningat the sight of me.

They stare at my face, but since I haven't been able to see a reflection, I don't know what I look like. I grin at them waving my hand at them catching a ray of light off my skin inciting the sparkles on my skin. Guilt begins to enter my body at the idea of killing these old friends, but now that I've revealed myself, I have to either change them or kill them.

Phoebe doesn't seem like the type that would want to be a vampire stuck at her young age for the rest of her life. Victor would like to be stuck at the age of his young body but his personality might not be something I need tagging along with me.

Fear has frozen them both as I quickly block out my thoughts running toward them with a grin. I don't want to make them suffer so I run toward Phoebe first quickly turning her head and breaking her neck killing her instantly. Victor watches in disbelief his dark black hair in his face and fear covering his irises. Part of me wishes I had Jaspers gift to give him the best emotions instead of fear at this end of his life. I can only hope that he does not think ill of me for doing this to them both.

I move toward him quickly as to not cause him pain I grab his head turning and breaking his neck. I watch the light leave his eyes the guilt coming back into my body. I move toward Phoebe grabbing her up in my arms and letting her scent overwhelm my senses. I quickly bite into her neck the best vein I can find.

The pure taste of her blood is the biggest pleasure I've ever felt. Her blood is the sweetest and best compared to the animals I drank from earlier. She runs dry quickly and I drop her to the ground grabbing Victor next and quickly taking his arm instead hoping for the same taste.

Something is wrong with Victor's blood. It tastes strange and not as sweet as Phoebe. It's as if his blood is coated in something that I can't quite figure out. I pull away from him pushing his body away from the disgusting taste of his blood. I move around his clothes removing his jacket and stuffing my hands into his pockets.

My eyes widen as I pull out the needles from his jacket. A small Ziploc bag is with the needles containing some type of white substance. I'm so thankful I managed to get Rebecca away from Victor before he got her addicted to this stuff.

I toss it to Victor's body deciding to leave his stuff with his body. I move to Phoebe taking in her clothes and jacket. I grin quickly removing her coat and checking the pockets. I'm grateful not to find anything like I found on Victor, her pockets are empty.

Something seems wrong about these two being together and killing them because of it. The anger I felt for what they did to Rebecca comes back. I realize the anger and emotions got more ahead of me than my own thirst. I probably could have held my breath if the anger hadn't overwhelmed me completely.

I shake my head frowning at the bodies but quickly push it aside. What's done is done. There is no going back and changing my actions to these two people. I've killed them, I'm a monster as **he **once called himself.

One thing I'm grateful for in this body that those human memories his face are blurry. Then again, a part of me hates it for that reason too, as his face is blurred by fading human memories. The only thing that I can do is try to remember even though it's blurry or else I'll forget him completely.

I quickly decide to take Phoebe's shirt and put her jacket back on her body zipping it up. I know that I can't leave them here like this so hopefully I can move them and make it look like they were mauled by the same panther that got me. I grab them both after pulling on Phoebe's shirt while pushing in Victor's needles into his front jacket pocket and then take off running through the forest area. I stop further away realizing that this must be as far as they searched for me.

The area around here isn't tainted with human blood or scent. I drop their bodies also pulling out my ripped and ruined shirt from earlier. I suddenly notice a bag across Phoebe's body as I quickly move toward it. I open the flap turning it over and letting the contents fall to the earth floor.

There is her wallet, makeup bag, cell phone, and contacts container. I jump for the makeup and contacts before putting the rest back into the bag. I open the contacts to see a pair of normal contacts with another pair of dark green eyes.

I sigh biting my bottom lip before moving back toward Victor's body. I check the other pocket of his jacket that I didn't check earlier pulling out a pocket knife. I nod thanking my lucky stars for these much-needed things. I open the makeup bag finding a small compact mirror releasing a breath before opening the mirror.

I gasp as my eyes reflect in the mirror. Two red eyes are blazing at me from my reflection in the mirror. Not only that, but my chin is covered in red splotches of blood from both the humans and the animals. I can only hope that after I feed on a few more animals they'll turn to the familiar golden butterscotch.

I notice the red tint to my hair as well as the sun shines on my face. The other thing I notice is that my face is a little too pale and I need to add a little color. I heard from Phoebe and Victor's conversation that there is a memorial happening on campus, no doubt for me.

I need to make sure that I don't look anything like my human self. My hair and my face might give me away but if I use the contacts, the makeup, and the knife to change my appearance, than I might get past everyone without any questions.

I quickly move to the knife deciding to start there first. I grab a part of my hair grabbing the knife and closing my eyes. I love my hair completely and to do this is painful but it's necessary. I use the knife to cut through my hair watching the pieces falling to the ground. I sigh but on the inside, I realize this is good for more evidence on what might have happened to me.

Once my hair is short enough, I toss it toward Victor's body. Next is the makeup on my face. I add some color to my face knowing that I need to direct attention away from the skin tone. I then add the contacts hoping that they'll last until I can get on and off the campus. Hopefully, I don't bump into anyone while on campus, but on the off chance that I do, this appearance won't cause problems.

I smile in the mirror seeing that I don't look anything like I used. No one will think I'm me with these changes. I toss the rest back to Phoebe grabbing the gloves from her hand happy that she's obsessed with fingerless gloves.

I quickly make sure that everything fits before moving toward the bodies. Before I added the makeup to my face, I had wiped the panther's blood mixed with both Victor's and Phoebe's blood on their clothing. It is the only thing I can think to do to stage the scene. I shake my head not liking this part of the situation but it has to do in order to stage the scene.

I grab Victor's bottom half of his left leg and ripped it from his body. I have to make this seem as if the panther tore them apart. I use my hands to scratch up his leg and his clothes even moving toward his pants and unbuttoning them. I decide to make it look as if they were in some act of passion, since I stole Phoebe's shirt, when the panther struck.

I move toward Phoebe moving my hands toward her neck and pulling some of the skin back as if it were the skin of a chicken I just ate. Part of me is appalled at what I'm doing, but I can't think about that right now. **They **always told me that I have to keep a low profile as to not provoke the vampire royalty known as the Volturi.

I finish staging the scene tossing in my own shirt with my hair clippings as well as my backpack, without my planner or photos inside, along with my phone before turning away from them. I had to break my cell phone, something I hated doing completely. It was easier to stage the scene that way as I move toward the parking lot exit of the forest stepping out. I keep my hood over my head and stuff my free fingers into my pants.

I look around noticing that the parking lot is half-empty. I quickly hold my breath before the scent can overwhelm me yet again. I move forward toward the door on the side realizing that everyone is walking the direction of the auditorium. I shake my head blocking out the memories and emotion of wanting to see if Renee and Phil have come here to see me.

I move through the empty hallways happy that everyone is preoccupied. I move up the stairs quickly not paying attention to my speed. I make it to the second floor before I know it standing in front of my dorm with Rebecca. I stand quickly making sure no one is inside before turning the knob. Rebecca has the tendency to leave the door unlocked but I used to come to the room locking it so she didn't remember not locking it.

I quickly shuffle into the room managing to close the door fairly gently. I flip on the lamp on the desk knowing the overhead light might seem suspicious. I pull off my jacket moving around the room quickly. The best thing about being a vampire is the speed as I'll be out of here faster than what it took my to get in here.

I search through my available clothes noticing the different scents in the room. The familiar human scent of Rebecca's perfume, stronger and more potent coats her desk and bed. Other scents that aren't too familiar besides the smell of leather and flowers reminds me of Ms. Gregory. Another scent mixed in with all the scents that move along the room across all my things is different from others. It's most certainly male mixed with a certain smell reminding me of gunpowder from when I lived with Charlie.

I shrug my shoulders tossing it to the back of my already cluttered mind. I move to my desk trying not to make a huge mess all over the desk. I pull things out of my desk shaking my head nothing helps me right now.

I move toward my bed grabbing my brown leather purse that I brought with me from Forks. The bag will work to keep a few necessities with me. I move toward the closet the smells from the room assaulting my senses. The thirst flares yet again setting my blood-hazed mind into a frenzy. I quickly lock my body cutting off my breathing even though it's only uncomfortable.

I move into the closet my hands reaching for shirts. My eyes move along each shirt coming up empty. I move toward my dresser knowing if I take something, it should be something that Renee won't notice missing until a few months afterward.

I dig through the clothes carefully pulling out a black tank top. It might be short sleeve but it will give me some much-needed breathing room for a sweater or something and not look completely out of place. I quickly pull off Phoebe's shirt pulling on the tank top on over my torso. I sigh in relief how it snugs my body. I move toward Rebecca's mirror my eyes widening further. The makeup I did was a decent job but it's not that easy to make this face bright with color.

I look up toward my face to see the contacts are missing. My eyes widen shaking my head and opening my eyes further. I realize the venom in my eyes must have deteriorated the contacts themselves. This will be all right since it's slightly sunny outside and I can shield my eyes with a pair of shades.

I move to grab a white towel from Rebecca's side of the room removing the makeup from my face knowing that Rebecca will believe she did this to her towel, as this is what it's for. I move back toward my dresser closing the drawer and returning to the closet searching for a sweater and a pair of jeans. I find a pair of black jeans knowing these will be nice when walking through the forest, as most things won't show up in the black very easily.

I switch my jeans with the black skinny ones kicking off my blue vans. I search the floor for a pair of boots knowing sneakers won't last while running through thick terrain. I find a pair of boots that someone gave me for Christmas last year shortly after **he **left. I grab them swiftly pushing my feet inside the mid-thigh black lace up boots.

I smile feeling comfortable for once. I'll have to find a stream sometime soon to bathe as I can't risk anyone else's safety while I'm on campus. I'm already holding my breath as it is so that I don't attack an unsuspected student.

I run my eyes over the jackets, over shirts, and sweaters. My eyes hesitantly flicker toward Rebecca's side gluing to a dark green crop sweater. I grab the sweater pulling it from the hanger pulling it on over my tank top. It fits snuggly, as it should since with this new figure I've managed to lose some weight. I frown in sadness remembering how Rebecca loves each piece of clothing she has. She'll notice this sweater missing immediately. I can't help it but I need this sweater for my voyage.

I move toward my side of the room searching my things locating a dark black beanie, a gray scarf, and a pair of simple shades. I sigh realizing this isn't going to be enough. I bite my bottom lip moving toward Rebecca's side of the room. She was Phoebe's best friend so she should have something to get into her dorm and I'll be able to take something from her room before they find her body.

Unfortunately, her dorm is on the other side of campus. Now that I think about it that might not be such a good idea. I need to finish here for the last time. I move through Rebecca's things finding a black gold studded backpack that will hold just the things I need while I use my purse as well.

I push in some things from my desk like pictures, email addresses, a few pens, and a couple batteries for a few of my things I might take with me. Considering I don't have a cell phone anymore, I'll have to buy a new one soon. Probably some sort of track phone with pay as you go time.

I search Rebecca's things finding a pair of black leather gloves I remember that she told me I could have a few weeks ago. She complained they didn't match anything in her closet and she would have thrown them out anyway. I suppose she won't mind if I really take them then.

I quickly pull on the gloves, hat, and stuff the scarf in my bag knowing that it will look strange if I'm walking around wearing it right now. It's not that cold around here for a scarf. I decide to quickly grab my two broken bind books stuffing them into my purse quickly. My hearing is listening all around the campus. I can hear music playing from the auditorium, amazing grace. Renee knows that song always used to get to me when I was younger and she was going through her phase of attending church weekly.

I quickly locate a few pieces of jewelry neither Renee nor my friends will even realize is missing like my moonstone ring and bracelet. They never noticed these types of things always on me, as I hadn't worn them the day I first went missing.

I remember seeing Rebecca with a few containers of contacts. She said most of them were for Halloween though. They would still cover the red in my eyes incase someone sees my face. The thirst is raging higher and higher in my throat and I'm not sure how much longer I can deal with this.

I quickly search Rebecca's desk and dresser for the contacts. She'll never realize they're missing until Halloween when she needs them for her costume for the annual Halloween frat party. I find them in her secret drawer in her dresser grabbing a few packs with wolf eyes, silver eyes, and a few ones with blue eyes, green eyes, and brown eyes.

I stuff them into my black gold studded backpack and pull it on my back. I quickly make sure everything is decent moving toward the mirror to fix my hair. Too bad my hair won't grow back from chopping it off with that pocket knife. I pull on my black beanie far enough down trying to cover my face enough that the sun won't shine on my face igniting the sparkle.

I move toward my things grabbing my bag not even noticing the lightweight now. I run toward the door after pulling the cord on the lamp and stuffing a few other things of clothes in my backpack and purse. I tossed Phoebe's shirt into Rebecca's closet as they were always sharing their clothes so Rebecca won't think anything about it.

I quietly step out of the dorm into the hallway pulling the door close. I left it unlocked as maybe Rebecca will remember not locking it today. I mean it is my birthday after all and they are having a memorial in the auditorium.

I quickly move down the hallway realizing the entire hallway is empty. I can't hear anythinginside any of the dorms telling me everyone must be at the memorial. It doesn't surprise me that this entire complex is at the memorial considering most of them have met me and knew me before I went missing. I feel bad about all of this considering Renee and Charlie, back in Forks, will be worried like crazy and Charlie will probably never give up searching for me. I can't go immediately back to Forks because of the entire state of Washington will already know about my disappearance.

I lean against the wall pulling out my shades and pushing them against my face. Using my shades will stop having to use up the short amount of contacts I have. My senses are on high alert and my sense of smell is still cut off since I've stopped breathing.

Suddenly I hear a familiar voice, "I can't believe they've already presumed her dead."

The voice is Hillary and she sounds to be sniffing. The voice of Rebecca sounds next, "I know right. They've assumed some wild animal must have gotten ahold of her or something. There was one sighted in Georgia just yesterday about a camping ground. You never really know."

I sigh moving down the hall taking the other set of stairs so that I won't come into contact with them. I can suddenly hear footsteps telling me everyone is out of the auditorium as the memorial must be over. I quickly move down the stairs carefully trying not to cause any more commotion than necessary.

I push the doors open gasping for breath in one gulp before cutting off my supply once again. The air around here is far too tainted. I move toward the parking lot knowing no one will be paying enough attention to me to notice me enter the forest.

My senses are completely on the surrounding beating hearts that I don't hear the scream from the forest area. Someone has found Phoebe and Victor.

"AHA!"

Everyone stops hearing the scream before panic sets in and I quickly dash into the tree line covering myself. I believe it's time I got out of here I think but before the thought is over I'm running through the forest area.

Goodbye, Florida. Hello world.


	14. 12

12.

**_Two Months Later_**

I groan again for the millionth time this hour. I have been sticking to the forest mostly in the past two months. I had no idea that this life could be so boring. I've run out of how many times I've bathed in a pond or lake because of sheer boredom.

I bought a phone a few a weeks ago just to have something to do. Surfing the web tends to help with the boredom. I managed to get a few books from stores that were close by. I haven't killed another innocent human for blood again. There have been a few humans camping that I've gotten a few bucks from. It's the only way I know to get any money. Rebecca didn't have any money when I checked the dorm before I left.

I groan leaning against the tree the moon shining brightly. I've hunted until I felt stuffed because of boredom but now it's sitting back in. I've stayed away from populated areas in hopes of avoiding temptation. I know I'm somewhere close to Tennessee as yesterday I was in Mississippi hunting a few deer.

I sigh pushing myself to my feet. I've got a few hundred dollars and I need some new clothes. I grab my backpack from the floor checking the amount of money double-checking for precaution. I pull my arms through the straps grinning as I hear the familiar sounds of the forest nightlife.

I smile taking off like a bullet through the forest. I can barely feel the wind on my skin from how hard and thick my skin has become. I begin to smell the familiar scent of humans somewhere off to my left through the wooded area. I shake my head shutting off my breathing just incase there is sweet delectable human blood just ahead.

I make it to the edge of the forest finding a simple shopping district. I smile stepping from the forest thankful for the dark night and sun free atmosphere. I quickly pull off my gloves along with my beanie on top of my head before walking along the deserted street ahead.

I mentally pray that no humans emerge from the surrounding buildings, as my appearance isn't that grand. Mud clings to both sides of my boots, my black tank top hidden underneath my green sweater is torn toward my side and back from the claws of my last meal, my pants have grass stains on the knees, and last my hair has a few sticks and leaves from lying on the forest floor.

I sigh mistakenly breathing in a gulp of air. I'm thankful that the thirst in the back of my throat is sedated for now and it only flickers for a second before lowering at the scent of humans. I raised my head as I pass many buildings catching glimpses of the names of the boutiques.

I come across a lower class building instead of the many expensive ones I just passed. I smile deciding that a lower class establishment will have a better chance of moving around unnoticed. Than again, vampires always manage to attract attention from the unfortunately curious human population.

Well, I can buy more things in the less expensive place seeing as I'm tight on cash at this particular moment. I pull my gloves back on my hands but stuff my beanie into my backpack for safekeeping. I grab the handle of the door stepping inside.

Immediately, the smell of dust and that typical old people smell assaults my heightened sense of smell. I hear the bell above the door jingle alerting the owner or cashier of the new guest. I let the door close behind me as I take a look around slowly.

I have to be careful of my speed as to not gain unwanted attention. I can barely remember the talk I had with **him **about the so-called vampire royalty somewhere in Europe if I remember correctly. I step up to a rack my eyes taking in all the different clothes styles.

I can suddenly hear the familiar thump of a human heart closer toward the front of the building. I shake my head from the approaching bloodlust before quickly shutting off my breathing. Can't have another innocent human killing again.

"Welcome to Nashville's Lonely Resale store. Is there anything I can help you with?"

I turn my head at the sound of the feminine voice. Standing before me is a girl with different color hair, red skinny jeans, black long sleeve top, black, and red converse, and not to mention bizarre dark blue eyes. The eyes were a complete contrast with her appearance as I half expected them to be either dark green or a brown like in my human life.

I remember her question as I sigh pulling out the confidence from piratical thin air and coming up with a decent lie, "Well, now that you mention it, I'm looking for some clothes for myself. I've been camping for the past week and my clothes have gotten torn from my clumsiness I'm afraid. I don't have much money to spend so I was hoping to find something cheap."

She nods smiling as I notice her nametag _Hi, I'm Natasha._

Her eyes widen and I hear the unmistaken mis-beat of her heart. Her cheeks darken slightly and it takes only a few more minutes to realize it. She sings the opposite way. Great.

"So, are you going to continue camping?"

I smile nodding watching as she moves her hair over her shoulder before smiling and motioning for me to follow her, "Just follow me. I know just the rack you should check out."

I follow behind her my throat burning more fiercely. I couch hoping to clear it but unfortunately, I only make it worse by sucking in the tainted air around me.

She stops at a rack closer to the front desk smiling at me, "Here you go. I'm sure you can find something here."

I nod watching as she rocks on the heels of her feet causing me to raise an eyebrow as her cheeks immediately darkens before she lowers her head, "Just let me know if you need anything."

I nod watching her walk off. I turn toward the rack of clothing moving articles of clothing around on the steel rack. I find a couple shirts draping them over my arm along with tank tops, a couple pairs of shorts, and a couple of jackets.

I step from the rack moving toward the front counter smiling at Natasha, "Do you have any dressing rooms? I want to try these on if it's possible."

She gulps before nodding slowly before reaching behind the counter and grabbing a key before walking toward the back of the store. I follow behind her spotting the group of beige stall dressing rooms. She unlocks the first room smiling at me as she does so and then puts this number hanger on the doorknob.

"Here you go. Take all the time you need. When you get done just bring the number back to the front desk."

I nod as she scampers off toward the front desk. I giggle shaking my head as I step into the dressing room. I drop the pile of clothes on the seat in the corner turning the lock on the back of doorknob. I carefully take a slow breath thankful that the small stall isn't contaminated with the human scent.

I begin to remove my clothing grabbing a shirt and standing in the mirror. My skin looks so pale in the mirror that I realize I can't wear shorts in public. I guess I can buy them and just stick to the forest while I'm wearing them.

I move toward the other clothes trying them on as well, seeing that they fit just fine. The jackets fit as well being thick enough to keep out the horrible monstrous rain. I smile nodding my head and changing back into my other clothes grabbing my things and the clothes. I step out of the stall grabbing the number from the doorknob walking toward the front counter.

There is an older man behind the counter now and I can see the familiar dark blue eyes on his face. He has a nametag on his shirt, _Manager Timothy Robbins._

He smiles at me swallowing as I watch his Adams apple bob slightly from his nerves, "Are you ready to checkout, miss?"

I nod, "Yes, sir."

I slide the number over the table as he reaches for it. I drop the pile of neatly stack clothes on the counter for him to run through the scanner. Moving my backpack around my body, I rummage through the inside locating the wallet as the manager finishes scanning the clothes.

"Alright, miss, that will be fifty dollars and forty five cents."

I nod counting out the money from the wallet sliding it over to him. He quickly puts it in the register counting out my change and handing it over smiling at me, "Do you want a bag for all of these clothes, mam? With a fifty dollar purchase you get a free bag."

I smile, "Sure, thanks."

He grabs a bag from behind him sliding the clothes into the bag. He quickly hands it over smiling, "Have a good night."

I nod, "Thanks. You too."

I turn on my heel walking toward the door and stepping back outside. I sigh moving down the sidewalk once again cutting off my breathing just incase humans come from the surrounding buildings. I suddenly hear music just ahead of me.

The familiar sounds of country music enters my sensitive hearing. I strain further hearing laughter and thousands of heartbeats. There must be some kind of party happening in the middle of town or something. I sigh slightly depressed that I probably shouldn't partake in the party since that is particularly messing with fate.

I shrug my shoulders mentally arguing with my conscience about the pro's and con's of this decision. I should just try it once. I'm hopelessly bored in the forest without anyone to talk with.

I walk down the sidewalk stopping a simple dress store grabbing the handle. Just one party can't hurt anything. Right?

I smile despite the nerves I'm beginning to feel deep within my stomach. I press down my shirt and skirt attempting to smooth out the wrinkles. I lower myself down to the bench shaking my head.

This is completely stupid. I shouldn't tempt myself around the scent of human blood like this.

I turn my foot over inspecting my heel for anything that might force me to trip. That wouldn't be good one bit. If I hurt some innocent human tonight, it will be my entire fault. I sigh for the millionth time in the last five minutes before standing to my feet.

I grab the black coat from the hanger on the wall and step out of the restroom. I smile at the other humans taking the time to wash my hands as other humans were doing to give the persona that I actually did use the restroom. I can practically feel the stares on my body as I dry my hand with the paper towels before stepping from the restroom. I grab my things from the basket sitting outside the restroom and walk out of the building.

This was the only place I could think of to change into the clothes I bought at the more expensive boutique. It also helped when there was a snobby woman in the store practically pushing her granddaughter around the store for this and that. She had left her cart unattended to help her granddaughter in the change rooms and no one else was paying attention so I helped myself to half of the wad of cash in her wallet.

I was able to buy a complete outfit. The outfit is basically a dark blood red top that connects with a simple string type skirt along with a pair of beautiful pair of black heels that just stands out against my pale thick granite skin. The huge overcoat I bought from another boutique that was half-off.

I suck in a tainted breath loving the other scents besides the human blood. I move toward the forest undetected locating a simple tree and stuffing my things into the huge hole in the center of the trunk. I retreat from the forest following behind the crowd of the humans moving along the street.

Turns out, there is some kind of party taking place in the middle of the square. I can hear familiar country music playing by a local band blending with the other noises of the surrounding humans. I smile to myself moving around and taking a glance at the people standing around.

There are even a few games playing close by for the kids no doubt. I follow the crowd toward the music taking in the dancing area in the front of the stage. I can suddenly feel a gaze following me around as I move toward the bar contemplating if I can even drink any alcohol.

I bite my lip shrugging it off. I spot a hanger, tugging off my jacket and placing it on the brown wood hanger. I merge with the crowd toward the dancing area swaying my hips to the beat. Most people are just dancing by themselves so I don't look out of place in the slightest.

I dance along to the beat of the song that sounds more like blues than country music. Suddenly I feel hands on my hips and they feel rough telling me it's most certainly not a female.

"Pretty lady! What's ya name?!"

His voice slurs and I can hear the distinct southern accent. I turn around taking in his short shaggy brown hair and dark blue eyes. There are dimples in the corner of his mouth as his lips form a simple smirk.

"My name is whatever you want it to be."

I'm not going to do anything with this boy. He reminds me slightly of the friends I left behind in Florida.

He smirks, "Alright, I see how it is."

I smirk myself twisting around as the song changes into something with more beat. He grabs my waist moving along with me but pulls me back tighter against him.

"Name's Mark."

I sigh feeling his breath against my neck. I gasp the feeling covering my body and it's the wrong move. The burn in my throat flames once again registering in my brain. I turn around toward him my entire mind and body clouded with bloodlust. I can't see past the blood lust either causing my hands to glide up his arms gripping his shoulders.

He responds by tugging me closer and I bury my face in his neck feeling the pulse in his neck. My eyes close as I attempt to fight against the bloodlust as my fingernail moves tenderly along the vein pulsing in his neck. The dark blue vein looks heavenly as it pulses along with the beat of the song.

Suddenly he moves us around where his leg is between my legs and he begins to grind against me. My head leans back as I groan my entire body shaking with both bloodlust and desire. His hand moves along my neck as he leans down placing a simple kiss to my neck.

My eyes snap open connecting with his. Unfortunately, his eyes widen as he stops our movements.

"Y-Your e-eyes…"

My eyes widen as I disentangle myself with him shaking my head, "I-I have to go."

I practically run away from him cutting off my breathing ignoring the horrible burn in the back of my throat. I can't believe I was about to drain him in the middle of a crowded square. I make it to the wooden hanger trying to locate my coat but come up empty.

I groan in despair when I can't find it. I turn searching the crowds hoping to locate the person that might have stolen my beautiful coat. I catch a glimpse of my face in a mirror my eyes widening at the dark black of my eyes. I barely remember when **he **explained to me that the blackness is high thirst.

I shake my head tearing my face away from the mirror searching the crowd once again. I spot someone carrying a dark black coat and take off knowing I need that coat to get out of here. I can't have another human male latching onto my cold skin and being an unfortunate victim of my raging bloodlust.

I am careful not to run faster knowing that it will only take a slight push to make me take off like a bullet. The person carrying the coat walks faster than a human normally does as I practically jog to keep up with them. They move through the crowd barely missing hitting other people.

Suddenly I notice it's a male and there's something different about him. I'm not sure if he's even human actually. He enters the surrounding forest area and I quickly follow him because obviously he knows I'm following him.

I hear a giggle from further ahead of us. My body freezes my eyes widen as I recognize the familiar voice. The wind picks up and blows the air around. I look ahead to see the man as stopped and I take in the color of his hair. Light blonde curls, which remind me of Alice's mate, Jasper, hair.

My eyes widen filling with tears as I take in the small smiling grinning petite vampire. Her face is even more beautiful seeing it with my vampire eyes. Her skin, a translucent shade as her yellow gold eyes show nothing but love toward me. The raging bloodlust in my body completely disappears as I run toward her wrapping my arms around her shoulders closing my eyes feeling the happiness fill my entire being.

"Alice."

She giggles hugging me back tightly, "Oh, how I've missed you, Bella.

I gasp quietly hearing my name from her mouth. I step back smiling gratefully at her, "It's not that I'm not grateful to see you, but what are you doing here?"

Suddenly Jasper moves around beside her smiling slightly at me, "Bella."

I grin, "Jasper."

He chuckles tossing my coat toward me, "Alice thought it would be wiser to get you away from the crowd before we appear."

I nod sighing rubbing my arm awkwardly, "That was best, unfortunately. If you hadn't come when you did, another poor human would have been a victim to my ever raging bloodlust."

Jasper sighs understanding the most. Alice nods her eyes sad, "I saw the other one. We went to Florida and found out about your disappearance. They apparently found your things with the humans."

I nod lowering my gaze toward the floor, "I left my phone and a few of my things with the bodies. I thought it would be best to give Renee, Phil, and Charlie along with all of my old and new friends some type of closure."

Alice nods her face sad at the strange turn of events their departure forced my life into. Jasper sighs but I notice he's on high alert watching my every move. I eye him feeling a little bombarded by his gaze and the marks along his skin.

I never paid much attention as a human the last time I saw him but I can see him more clearly now. His hair is a much darker blonde than I remember Rose's, his eyes a fresh gold telling me it hasn't been long since he hunted. Probably a wise choice considering they were out in public so frequently which doesn't help Jasper's self-control too much.

My eyes suddenly pick up the marks along his skin, which forces a hiss between my lips. Before I realize it, I'm crouched down my eyes narrowed toward Jasper as hiss after hiss explodes from between my lips.

I barely hear Alice's shriek as Jasper pulls her behind him as he crouches to defend his mate. I try unsuccessfully to pull back but it's hopeless. Jasper moves around his eyes watching me carefully obviously detecting the many changes in my emotions. Ever since becoming a vampire my emotions haven't been the best or safest to be around.

Alice suddenly leans toward Jasper's ear grinning widely. Jasper sighs giving her a questioning gaze but she shakes her head, "It's alright, Jaz. She saw the scars and got scared. That's it. She doesn't even understand what's going on right now. I'm sure of it."

Jasper looks from her toward me hesitance displayed in his irises. Very slowly Jasper comes out of his crouch flitting a good distance away but also close enough to defend his mate if need be.

Alice smiles at me holding her hands up, "Bella, it's alright. Jasper was in a newborn army after he was changed. He fought a lot of other newborn vampires because of his master. She was a horrible woman and that's the reason for his scars. Remember, you have one, right? It's on the inside of your wrist."

My eyes slit toward her before I glance down toward my wrist seeing the faint outline of something on my wrist. The sight causes me to stand upright as my fingers move over the remnants of a bite mark. The only probably was it wasn't alone. My fingers trail over another mark above the older one.

I can barely remember James and his attack in the ballet studio. One of the problems with humans having a relationship with vampires, not all vampires are so called "vegetarians."

I forget about my surroundings and the other vampires next to me. I force myself to remember my change before the horrible fire that raged throughout my entire body. The two pale red vampires in black cloaks that discovered me all alone in the dark and rainy forest. There's a fog that makes their faces blurry but I know that if I ever see them again, I'd recognize them in a heartbeat.

"Bella?"

I jump realizing that I spaced slightly. I find Alice standing about a foot in front of me attempting to respect the distance, "Are you alright?"

I sigh, the scents of the forest leaking into my air before I shrug, "I'm fine."

I turn my head toward Jasper standing away from him frowning before speaking, "I'm fine, Jasper. I didn't realize what was happening. One minute I was talking pleasantly with you guys. Then I saw the scars and before I knew what I was doing, I was crouched down hissing at you both. I'm so thoroughly embarrassed right now."

Alice smiles widely as Jasper moves to her side. Jaspers eyes are wide and I feel slightly claustrophobic. Alice grabs Jasper's hand sighing, "Jasper, Bella doesn't like you watching her like a hawk. How would you feel if she were staring at you like that?"

Jasper nods sighing, "Sorry, Bella. It's just I've never seen a newborn vampire with such restraint."

I shake my head at his revelation, "I don't feel like I've had much restraint. I've had to stick to the forest and keep away from crowded areas or else someone else will be just like Phoebe and Vic at the college. I came close to draining one guy in the middle of the dance floor and the only thing that stopped me was him seeing my black freaking eyes. Apparently the venom had ruined the small amount of contacts I do have."

Alice giggles smiling, "You can come with us, Bella. We have a place nearby for us. I have a nice stash of contacts for you. There were a lot of things I piled up on after the birthday incident. Keeping you know who out of my mind wasn't a picnic but I got it done."

I sigh before raising my head and nodding, "Alright. I'll come with you, but it's not with h…"

I trail off because I haven't even mentioned him aloud in months. I lower my gaze upon hearing Alice's sigh and Jasper's pained gasp as they realize I still haven't gotten over their departure from my life last year.

Someone walks toward me taking my hand causing me to look up into Jasper's eyes. He smiles pleasantly at me, "We aren't going to leave you again until we have too, Bella. By your emotions, I can tell that you aren't ready to see him again anytime soon. We'll stay with you until you order us away or something else."

I smile nodding at him, "That sounds great, Jasper."

I hear Alice clapping her hands smiling broadly, "Let's get going. I believe we might have to go hunting when we get there. Bella's eyes are telling me she's awfully thirsty."

I sigh as the burn registers in my brain again. The burn is strong as it was when I almost attacked that human boy, Mark. Jasper groans and suddenly he takes me hand, "We won't let you hurt anyone else, Bella. I can't imagine how boring the forest must have been for you to venture out for clothes and entertainment."

I smile sadly, "I've been stuck in the forest for the past two months all alone. I needed something to do even if it entailed tempting fate."

Jasper nods as Alice comes to my side, "We need to be careful, Bella. We're going to stick to the forest but there are houses just outside of the area."

I nod understanding, "I have to hold my breath. Wait, I need to get my things from the square. I left them in a tree…"

Alice giggles moving toward a boulder and pulling out a bag full of things. I recognized my things with my black gold studded backpack and my brown bag along with the resale store bag containing the clothes I bought.

I bring my bottom lip between my teeth noticing how different the feel is against my skin. My teeth are razor sharp now and my skin is granite and completely different from my flabby human flesh.

"Is it possible that I change my clothes? I don't want to destroy this beautiful outfit running through the forest or hunting."

Alice grins nodding her head and tossing me the resale store bag, "Just a heads up, find something you won't mind getting dirty or tearing…"

I sigh nodding my head remembering Alice's gift. I rummage through the bag searching for something decent to wear through the forest keeping in mind not to grow attached to the outfit. I grab a pair of skinny jeans, a pair of purple converse, and a gray shirt with writing on it. I keep in mind not to even read the message on the shirt considering the shirt will probably ruin. If anything, I hope I can keep the shoes afterward.

Jasper clears his throat, "I'll just give you some privacy."

I smile nodding watching him take off through the forest before turning toward Alice. She beams smiling at me as I lay the clothes on the ground before removing my clothes. Alice shrieks causing me to roll my eyes as she turns around, "Really, Bella?"

I smirk giggling, "Alice, we're both girls for crying out loud. I understand that you grew up in a completely different time period but this is something women do around other women."

Alice sighs before turning back around to catch me in my underwear. I smile encouragingly toward her stuffing my clothes into the bag before grabbing the jeans. I quickly slip inside the jeans and pull the shirt over my head hearing Alice nod as she smiles, "You look good, Bella. For once."

I roll my eyes flattening out my shirt over my body. I hear Alice begin to whisper, "Jas, you can come back now."

I blink and Jasper is standing beside Alice smiling. I quickly jam my feet in the sneakers tying them tightly and grabbing my sweater once again. Alice nods understanding as she's already dressed closely to the same way. I never noticed until now that she's actually wearing a leather jacket, blue shirt, jeans, and a pair of ankle boots.

I slip on my gloves once again but Alice shakes her head, "The gloves aren't necessary today, Bella. Nor is the beanie. We'll be sticking to the forest and we shouldn't come across any humans where we're going. The sweater is a just case matter."

I nod understanding and grabbing my things smiling at them both. I slither my arms through the straps of the backpack and pull the straps of the purses up my arms placing them on my shoulders.

Alice smiles toward Jasper understanding before she turns toward me, "Jasper is going to stay closer to you, Bella. If you come across a human scent, it will be hard to get you out of it. Jasper has experience with newborns."

I nod understanding as Alice walks ahead of us, "I'll be ahead you both by about a mile and a half. You'll still be able to hear me though. Alright?"

I nod smiling, "That's fine, Alice."

She nods smiling at Jasper and me, "Wait until I'm ahead and then come."

Jasper nods watching Alice take off. I can see the distress on Jasper's face allowing her distance between them. Obviously, it's not his favorite plan by far.

"You could follow her, Jasper. As long as I hold my breath, I won't harm anyone."

Jasper nods seeming to understand but he shakes his head sighing, "Alice would prefer we be safe than sorry. She hasn't been able to get a good read on you. She practically stumbled upon a vision of you. We were doing other things and it was amazing for her to see you again. It's just a good thing that I put a house in Nashville for Alice and I. You have no idea how long we've been staking out parties like the one tonight. She had a vision of you walking through the forest in your outfit. Obviously, that was after you put your things away. She hasn't seen anything else which means either you have a gift or someone else is following you."

I swallow down the discomfort, "Who would follow me? The only friends I even had were human. They didn't exactly know about the supernatural. I doubt any of them would know anything about what happened to me for real."

Jasper nods, "It's better to be safe than sorry. There could be someone following you right now and wouldn't know it. Vampires can be sneaky when they so choose."

I nod suddenly concentrating on Alice's distance just as Jasper nods, "She's got the distance. Lets get going before she realizes haven't left yet."

I nod as Jasper nods for me to go first. I take in one last breath before taking off behind Alice through the forest.


	15. 13

13.

Running through the forest is exhilarating. I can hear Alice's giggling ahead of me. It takes all my strength not to run faster than her in order to keep Jasper behind me. I'm still holding my breath, which isn't the most comfortable thing while running.

It's so strange to have all this extra space in my head to think of other things. Running is effortless as a vampire to the point where I can take in my surroundings. The flowers closing from bloom and the dew drops on the leaves of plants.

I can hear Jasper behind me growling which doesn't still well with me.

"Jas?" I question hesitantly.

He growls again, "Get to Alice now, Bella. I can feel another emotion alongside us. You both get to the house and don't come out. I'll take care of whoever it is."

I nod quickening my pace to get closer to Alice. I notice the speed Alice has taken realizing she probably heard Jasper's order to me. She looks at me with questions on her face, "I don't know, Alice. Someone's following us."

Alice racks her brain and I know she's attempting to force a vision but she sighs exhausted, "Let's go. If Jasper wants to take care of it, it's serious."

She picks up her speed and I follow right beside her. I keep my senses open except for my breathing knowing Alice can smell anyone approaching. Alice takes a left through the forest and I follow watching the terrain change slightly. Alice groans as she comes to a stop, "I completely forgot. Jasper showed this short cut to me last week. Unfortunately, there's this huge ravine that we'll have to jump over. With them following us, I won't have time to show you how to jump."

I nod understanding her logic, "I'll be alight. I've jumped over things during my two months in the woods. I think I'll be alright."

Alice nods, "I sure hope so because we can't afford to wait any longer."

Alice takes a step forward and I follow still keeping my ears poised for any sounds or movement. My eyes widen at the hug ravine Alice talked about. It's slightly bigger than I imagined. Alice suddenly raises her hand in the air pointing in the distance, "The house is just down there. Humans don't come out this far because of the animals in the forest. We'll be safe out here and you can breathe because I know it's uncomfortable."

I nod watching Alice step back a good distance before propelling herself forward and jumping in the air over the ravine. Alice is so graceful as she moves having had this life for so long. She gets to the bottom of the ravine, smiling over her shoulder waving toward me to follow her.

I take a step back deciding to take a breath thankful for the pure clean untainted air. I close my eyes for a second before opening them again and running toward the ravine. I jump in the air amazed by the view as the world flies around me.

The ground comes faster than I thought but I land gently against the ground smiling at Alice who nods appropriately, "That was very graceful, Bella. Even for a vampire."

I smile nodding feeling a little good about myself. No one has ever told me I was graceful before. As a human, I was far from ever being classified as anything close to graceful. Alice glances over her shoulder shaking her head, "Let's get inside before Jasper gets back."

I nod following her through the brush of trees. We come across a beautiful house/cottage. It's classy yet elegant with slight up to date furnishings. Alice pulls a set of keys from her pants walking toward the front door, "We should get to the basement. It's hard as hell to get down there without a key."

Alice opens the door and I quickly step inside. The inside is beautiful with hardwood flooring. The smells coating the inside tell me the furniture hasn't been in the house very long.

"Jasper showed me this place a few months ago. I had seen a vision of you going to Florida for college and we left the rest of the Cullens. They haven't any idea what we've done."

I nod hearing that name for the first time aloud. I haven't let myself think or say that particular name either. It just brought too many memories unfortunately. Alice closes the door and turns the lock on the back leading up the edge of the door.

"Jasper knows a secret way to get in the house from afar. The locks won't deter him."

I watch Alice run throughout the house locking the doors and windows. She even ties the curtains together making sure no one can see the inside of the house. She comes to my side taking my hand in hers, "Let's get to the basement. Jasper will either call or come through the secret passage."

I nod following behind her through the house bypassing the staircase into a smaller room. The room is a small office with bookcases and desk closer to the windows. There are a few leather loveseats in front of the desk as Alice pulls me into the room. She closes the door and locks it as I notice the windows are locked and the curtains are tied together.

Alice walks past me suddenly pushing the leather loveseats aside. She pulls the rug away from the floor and reaches down pulling a part of the floor up revealing a staircase leading down underneath the house.

"You first, Bella. It locks from the inside so that no one can get in."

I gulp down my nerves walking down the steps into the dark basement. I hear a set of footsteps coming down behind me before the entire room is enveloped in light.

"Boredom can either hinder you or entertain you. Apparently, Jasper got bored before while he was here with Peter, another vampire from the newborn army. They built this underneath the house considering we can dig the dirt ten times faster than any human."

The room is beautiful. There are chairs sitting around with an entire line of lights overhead. I can tell that this basement covers the ground underneath the house.

"There are a couple rooms down here but we hardly ever use any of it. Being down here for a long time begins to make some of us claustrophobic."

I nod as the smell of the dirt and furniture enters my nose.

"Jasper should show up soon. Until then we can just hang out down here."

I turn around pulling off my backpack and bags letting them fall to the ground. Alice is busy pulling the piece of floor back and pulling a huge thick silver chain through the holes on the floor. She then finds a lock pulling it through the hole and locking it tightly.

"Jasper showed me how to do a lot of things."

I nod understanding and moving around taking a seat on the chair. I sigh comfortable for the first time in a while. Standing is still entirely comfortable but I haven't sat in a soft plush plump chair in a couple of months. I'm allowed to feel some sort of comfort.

Alice sighs taking a seat as well smiling toward me, "So, Bella, how have you been?"

I bite my lip lowering my gaze toward my hands circling my fingers around each other, "N-Not good, Alice. I only went to Florida to get away from F-Forks…"

Alice sighs shaking her head, "I tried to tell him. It didn't matter what he did to you. Your future was engrossed with his. His decisions affected you more than he realized. You're a danger magnet, Bella. Danger just follows you around everywhere you go. I tried to tell him that I had seen you like us and that never changed. I convinced Jasper that I wouldn't interfere with anything in your life only if you were in danger. Unfortunately, I had no idea of a timetable for your change once I saw it. I had sent the bracelet but I still didn't have a timeframe that I could work with. I wanted to stop the change from happening, Bella. It was what I wanted because it would be better if he changed you himself. Bella, I want you to know that he does still care about you. He only left because he thought he was protecting you."

I sigh feeling the emotions overwhelm me again, "He once told me that I was the only thing that could hurt him. He is the only thing hurting me now, Alice. He has literally killed me for all tense and purposes. I made some good friends but I wasn't happy. This was all I wanted with him, but an eternity without him in my life is crueler than death. My parents were so worried about me that my mom enrolled me in grief counseling and didn't tell me. I had to read my schedule to see that, Alice. You claim to be my best friend, my sister, but you made no effort to come see me or contact me in anyway. I don't know how many times I emailed you they all went unanswered. My entire life has been altered because of that damn party. I officially hate my birthday now. Good thing I woke on my birthday as something different than human."

Alice sighs lowering her gaze toward the floor, "No one wanted to leave that way, Bella. You have to believe me when I tell you this. Leaving was the hardest thing any of us have ever done."

I roll my eyes, "Really? Even Rosalie was heartbroken?"

Alice scoffs, "At first she was happy, ecstatic. Time changed for us all. Even when we didn't want it too, it still changed. Rose began noticing how upset everyone was about moving. Rose has a special place in her heart for Forks because of the climate and I could tell she was slightly homesick for it again. It wasn't just moving that upset us all. There was this new balance that you brought into our lives. He wasn't unhappy but when you came and everything was right in the world. When we left you behind, it nearly killed us all. It was like all our happiness was drained away because you weren't with us. You're apart of this family now, Bella and it became very hard for us all to deal. Esme, Carlisle, and Emmett probably took it the hardest though besides you know who."

I nod hearing their names for the first time in months. I can't believe even Rose was beginning to miss me. It made no sense for someone like Rosalie Hale to miss me at all. Her life was better off without me in it. The pathetic human was finally out of her life, she has no reason to miss me at all.

I raise my gaze toward Alice swallowing down the venom pooling in my mouth, "Does he know anything about this…"

I pull my bottom lip between my teeth again watching Alice sigh glancing at my face before shaking her head, "He left the coven. We were in Alaska and he went hunting alone. He left a note in an abandon place for us. He tends to call Esme every few months. Apparently, he doesn't believe that he should make any decisions about anything because I can never get a decent read on him. They don't even know what Jasper and I are up to right now."

I nod suddenly hearing noise from down the corridor. Alice moves to her feet quickly holding her forefinger to her lips leaning against the wall by the hallway which we heard the noise. I could hear slight curses from deeper out glancing toward Alice who smiles encouragingly.

"Jasper?" she whispers.

A gust of wind blows and I watch Jasper at Alice's side immediately. He pulls her into his arms breathing slowly, "I'm sorry, Alice."

Alice pats his back stepping back smiling at him, "What happened?"

Jasper shrugs his shoulders, "I don't know. I felt another emotion besides us three while we were running to the house. I panicked because Bella is young and any new person could be seen as a threat. I had her get you both away while I tried to locate the person. I'm not sure who it was exactly but I know for sure that they were wearing a black cloak. If it were Jane or Alec, they could have used their gifts so I'm not sure. Their emotions were all over the place…"

I sigh pushing myself to my feet standing beside Jasper, "It's alright, Jas. Did they follow you?"

Jasper sighs shaking his head, "No, they were too busy running from me. They were fast I'll give them that. I can't be sure though of anything at this point. They could have been staking the place out, but I still want to give it some time before we venture back into town again. It's too risky at this point."

Alice nods understanding her mate's logic, "Can we at least get out of the basement? Bella also needs to hunt soon…"

At the mention of hunting, my thirst flares up once again causing me to groan toward Alice. She merely chuckles, "Sorry, Bella. It's necessary though."

I nod already knowing this was a part of vampire life even before I was changed. Jasper sighs nodding toward me, "I'll take you hunting, Bella. It's quicker using the passage to get out anyway."

I nod following behind Jasper while Alice quickly makes her way into the house. The hallway has plenty of light to guide us through as Jasper walks at a quick pace. I begin to notice a faint stream of fresh sunlight ahead. A human wouldn't have been able to see it so far off but with my enhanced vision and hearing, I can see the light and hear the sounds of the forest ahead.

Jasper chuckles picking up his speed as we finally make it to the end. Jasper opens the door revealing a small yet decent size entrance/exit to their basement. I step ahead of him entering another corridor as Jasper closes and locks the door behind us.

"There is a ladder that leads to the surface. We should be plenty safe out here."

I nod walking through the corridor. We come to that ladder my fingers reaching out and clutching the bars in my hands.

"Just push in the button on the lock. It should unlock just fine after that."

I nod my head climbing to the top. I grab the lock pressing in the button hearing the lock open and fall along with the chain. I push the top above letting it slide to the side. The sun immediately hits my eyes but I can see past it without needing to put up my hand to block the intrusion.

I quickly move out of the hole in the ground running around smiling at the scenery.

"Bella?"

I turn around to see Jasper smiling at me pleasantly, "I know the best place to find a few decent size deer in the area. We won't find too many big carnivores but there are plenty of deer."

I nod smiling pushing aside the horrid smell of deer. I've had plenty of deer in my time through the forest. We both take off through the forest me behind Jasper. I giggle hearing him behind me attempting to catch up.

We make it a few miles away from the house as Jasper slows to a stop. He smiles at me brushing himself off from the dirt that coats his pants, "Alright, there are always a herd of deer around here. Alice loves this spot for location. As always be careful when you attempt to catch a scent for there might be human scent mingling along."

I nod already knowing that from experience. Ever since my first hunt close to the human camping ground, I've been on guard whenever I hunt. I always clutch a tree in my hand so that if a human scent ever enters my sense of smell I can cut my senses off before I hurt someone.

Jasper walks toward me probably feeling my emotional distress. He frowns glancing around before looking at me again, "Are you alright? Do you need some help?"

I frown moving around taking in the huge tree behind us. Jasper follows my line of sight looking confused, "What's the deal with the tree?"

I sigh rubbing my fingers against each other nervously, "When I hunted alone, I had to clutch a tree incase human blood came through by the wind. My very first hunt I traveled out of Florida, I guess into Georgia. As I was attempting to smell my surroundings, the wind blew in a strong fresh human scent. I followed the scent like a possessed person into a human camping ground. I stopped before I could hurt them though. It was a family just camping. The mom had the strongest scent that day because she was pregnant the way her stomach protruded told me she was pregnant. I cut my senses and ran back close to where I was to begin with. Ever since, I've clutched a tree just to give me a second warning which is enough to turn my senses completely off."

Jasper's eyes widen as he steps back, "You cut them off mid hunt?"

I frown nodding, "Yeah. I didn't want to hurt those people. They were just a small family."

Jasper shakes his head, "That's remarkable. Most older vampires have problems with their thirst. This is unbelievable that you just shut down mid hunt like that. I've never met another vampire besides Carlisle that could even attempt something like that."

I shrug, "It didn't really help with Phoebe and Victor. The two people I killed at the campus."

Jasper sighs stepping toward me placing his arm around my shoulders, "We all have our moments of weakness. I'm very sure that if someone had been there with you, you would have been able to stop. You said that she was bleeding was the reason why you attacked her."

I frown lowering my gaze toward the floor nodding my head, "Yeah. I probably would have been able to get away if it hadn't been for that. Their blood was horribly tainted with the drugs they were using."

I hear a slight gag raising my head to Jasper. He frowns, a nasty look on his face, "Those are always the worst. During the seventies when people were into love and drugs, blood was always tainted. I should know as I drank a few humans during that time. It was enough to force me away from them for a while at least."

I nod sighing as the burn comes stronger in my throat, "Let's get this show on the road."

Jasper chuckles nodding as he walks around me, "How about I help you instead of the tree? It would be better that way."

I grin nodding as I hold still for him to wrap his arms around my shoulders, "If I hurt you, we'll try something else. Just don't let go of me."

Jasper nods as we both stand still. I can feel him breathing against my back as I sigh before shutting my eyes and standing completely still. I allow my sense of smell to travel the forest. My hearing coats the forest as well picking up plenty of different sounds.

I hear a group of squirrels fighting over an acorn, a bird feeding little birds a few worms she might have found, and a herd of deer about seven miles away from us. The sound of a small stream enters my ears as well telling me the deer are taking a break from the forest they too were thirsty.

"What do you smell, Bella?"

"A herd of deer about seven miles away from us. There's a small stream or something that the herd is drinking from."

"Very good, Bella. There is a female deer, a baby deer, and a huge papa deer. Which are you going for? Both parents are protecting the young one."

I grin, "The big one."

Immediately Jasper removes his arms letting me leave. I take off through the forest my attention still on high alert. The wind is known to be treacherous. I reach the stream in record time taking in the scene before me. The young one is still drinking from the stream while the huge big one stands on guard watching the surrounding forest.

I stand behind a huge tree just watching. Once I'm sure the wind won't bring a tainted scent, I crouch. Before I can hesitate, I jump into the air alerting the deer of my presence. The mother and young one run through the forest as I jump on the back of the big one.

Before I reach down to the jugular, I break his neck so that he doesn't feel any pain. Quickly I tear through the skin like butter groaning at the taste of the blood and warmth from it. For the rest of my immortal life, the only warmth I'm going to get is the blood from my prey.

He runs dry quickly and I feel slightly sloshy. I'll probably come back out in the early hours of morning for something else to hunt.

"Are you done?"

I jump having not really paid attention to my surroundings. Turning, I find Jasper leaning against a tree barely a hair out of place. I know I must have blood all over my shirt staining my skin as well.

I smile at him nodding my head, "I'm done."

Jasper nods understandingly, "We can always come back. Alice will probably need to hunt soon as well."

I step toward glancing down at my clothes groaning shaking my head. My shirt is completely ruined now with huge tears through the center as well as bloodstains everywhere. I'm just grateful that I didn't have a jacket to begin with, as it would be ruined as well.

"We can fix that if you want…"

I look up at Jasper shrugging, "I can deal with it."

Jasper shrugs as well, "Suit yourself. You'll get the hang of it soon enough."

I smile looking toward the sky seeing it get darker, "We should get back. I'm sure Alice will be worried about us."

Jasper notices the sky as well before nodding, "Let's hurry. We'll go around, just follow me."

We take off speeding through the forest. It takes a lot of concentration not to run past him, as I'm certainly stronger and faster than he is. The house comes into view quickly as the front door opens and we quickly climb the steps.

"Bella!"

I sigh, standing in the middle of the living room as Alice walks toward me. She stands directly in front of me her hands on her hips. Alice has managed to change her clothes for a reason I'm not quite sure about.

Her golden eyes glare at me as she shakes her head, "What did that outfit ever do to you, Bella?"

I shrug, "Got in the way apparently."

I hear a snicker a few feet away from us causing Alice to glare toward the culprit, "Jasper, do you have anything to say on this situation?"

I glance out of the corner of my eye to see Jasper smirk at his mate and wife, "Of course not, darlin. Carry on; I'll just escape to my office."

A gust of wind replaces Jasper's figure as we hear the closing of a door deep in the house up the stairs. Alice returns to me her eyes moving along my clothes.

"It looks as if I might have something for you. We may have to go buy you a few more things, but I should expect I have something for you. Stay right here and I'll be back with a few choices. Things look so differently against your complexion."

She flies away her blue jean skirt squeezing against her body. Before I can take a breath and collapse on the couch, she's back in front of me shaking her head.

"Don't even think about sitting on that couch, Bella. It cost more that you would believe. Those blood stains would never come out."

I roll my eyes folding my arms over my chest, "Well, will I be able to shower shortly?"

Alice sighs nodding, "Of course. I have to fix your hair decently. Really, Bella, if you're going to live in the forest you should invest in some more body products."

She pulls up a long sleeve white and blue stripped top against my body her eyes twinkling. A pair of dark jeans hangs from her other hand as she holds that up against me as well.

Nodding she grins, "Perfect! I thought they would look great on you. I'm afraid it's the only thing I have right now that will fit you."

Sighing she looks at me, "Do you think you'll be able to handle shopping tomorrow? You need a better wardrobe."

I cheeky smile to my face before nodding, "I'm sure I can handle it, Alice. It's good to be around you again. I've missed you even your addiction to shopping."

She smiles but I can see the sadness deep in her eyes before she shrugs, "Don't worry, you'll get tired of me soon."

I nod grinning widely, "Oh, I don't have any doubt about that, Alice."

In all honesty, I'm sure she'll be the devil tomorrow while shopping.


	16. 14

14.

The next day I sat in a yellow Porsche on the way to the nearest shopping district. Alice had convinced Jasper to stay at home and guard the fort while we went out shopping. After all this time being away from Alice, a shopping trip was almost comforting.

The little trips I'd had with Angie back in Forks weren't nearly as bad as Alice's. Hillary had my attitude toward shopping but Rebecca was a completely different story. She loved shopping almost as much as Alice does, but no one can rival Alice's shopping addiction.

"So, Alice," I begin as I look out the window at the passing neighborhoods, "what do you have planned for us today?"

Alice is dressed in her best as usual. I was slightly surprised this morning when she found me under the house in the cellar reading from a book on the bookshelf. She merely bounced down the steps grinning widely already dressed and fully showered.

A pile of clothes was tossed into my arms as I sat in a chair reading a book.

"There is a guest room upstairs last door on the left. A bathroom is on that hall which I'm guessing you can find as it smells horrid."

She shivers in slight disgust at the room she obviously hasn't been in. I look down at the clothes relieved to find a pair of simple jeans, a gray long sleeve shirt with a matching pair of underwear. She prances toward me dropping a pair of sneakers at my feet smiling at me.

"Well, get going. We've got a lot to do today, Bella."

So basically that's how my morning as been. Jasper had instructed Alice to allow me one hunt before my shower, which I was more than happy to allow. Alice pitched a fit but the smile was back on her face after our hour hunt.

I showered only to have Alice sitting in the bedroom once I was done. She moisturized my face before adding a little bit of makeup.

"Stop fidgeting so much, Bella," she scolded me acting as if I were a three year old, "you're going to be around other humans for a while. We have appearances to keep up. I have a couple pairs of contacts for tonight as your eyes still have a slight orange tint."

I stayed in that chair for about four hours while she played Bella Barbie on me. She was finally done and we were both satisfied with the outcome before she all but forced me out of the house toward the car. Turns out, the garage was a good deal away from the house, which made for a decent getaway. It also felt good to run after being cooped up inside the house all night.

"Oh, Bella," Alice stated bringing me out of my head, "we've got plenty to do. You need an entire new wardrobe not to mention shoes which I'm beginning to believe heels aren't your forte."

I turn toward her from the passenger seat giving her a look, which she avoids.

I shake my head staring out the window, "Alice, you know how much I hate shopping and heels anyway. I don't understand the point to any of this."

Alice rolls her eyes from the driver's seat, "I haven't seen you in a year, Bella. Is it such a crime that I want to spend some time with my best friend?"

I sigh folding my arms across my chest.

"Alright, Alice. Way to make someone feel bad. Seriously."

Alice giggles pressing against the gas even more. During my human years, I would have given her a deadly look about how fast she's going. Fortunately, since becoming a vampire I enjoy the faster speed of the car. Considering this is the first I've been in since my change the speed is exhilarating.

Alice begins to slow about ten minutes later as we enter town. Even in the car, I can hear the sounds of heartbeats ahead.

"Do you think you'd want your hair cut today, Bella?"

Confused I shrug, "I don't know, Alice. My hair won't grow back though."

Alice scoffs tapping the steering wheel.

"Oh, Bella. All I'm saying is it'll be easier to keep up. I won't have to spend too much time working on your hair anymore. I mean you've already cut it with a pocket knife. The least you could do is to allow someone to give it a decent look instead of the jagged edges."

I shake my head, "Stop, Alice. I don't want my hair cut at all."

She pouts but I shake my head at her. There's no possible way she can change my mind as my hair will not grow back. After about another twenty minutes we find a local shopping district with plenty of shops. Alice grins grabbing her things stepping out of the car grinning showing the world her shinnying white teeth. It's a great thing most of the humans feel intimated by Alice as they don't notice how scary that one smile really is.

I step out of the car feeling the stares of other humans. Alice gave me a pair of shades to use until we locate a decent store where I can escape to the restroom.

Alice squeals grabbing my arm pulling me along with her.

"Oh these are so beautiful."

She grabs a dress from the rack hanging it up against me, "This will totally look great on you."

It's a lovely dark blue dress that would probably stop mid thigh. I shrug, "I don't know, Ali."

She sighs shaking her head beginning to pout at me, "Oh, just try it on at least…"

I sigh grabbing the dress from her hands locating the dressing room. The room is small with only a small bench and two mirrors. I stand in front of the mirror once the dress in on smiling at myself. For the first time in my entire life, I actually feel beautiful. I feel worthy to be in Alice's presence now that I look like this. I always used to feel like the odd person in the group whenever I was around any member of the Cullen family.

I hear a slight squeal from the store as Alice moves to the outside of the dressing room.

"So you like it?"

I sigh rolling my eyes at her before quickly changing back into my clothes. Alice grins at me as I step out taking the dress from my hands.

"Don't worry, Bella, this day will be a piece of cake."

I nod watching her buzz through the store.

The sky began to get dark faster than I realized. I hadn't been shopping in such a long time that even Alice's over excitement didn't damper my mood. Just having her back in my life made my entire day more exciting.

"Wasn't that fun, Bella?"

Unfortunately, shopping will never be a completely fun thing for me. I glance toward Alice to see tons of bags hanging from her fingers.

I shrug, "It was great, Alice. Can we get back to the house? Being here has made me slightly…"

I didn't want to rain on Alice's parade but being in a human store all day isn't the best thing for a newborn vampire. On more than one occasion, I had to cut my breathing off. I hadn't discovered any scent that is as breathtaking as I was to **him**.

Alice sighs nodding, "Of course, Bella. I called Jazzy at the register. He's waiting on us. I kind of need to hunt too."

She tosses the bags into the back of the car as we hop into our seats. Alice doesn't waist any time hitting the accelerator and speeding the entire way back to the secluded house. Jasper's scent comes quickly surprising Alice as well as myself.

"Why is Jasper this close out?"

I shrug as Alice slows down her eyes closing, "I don't see anything. I'm beginning to worry. The house is a good five to ten miles up the road."

I turn my head from side to side unhooking my seatbelt of the car, "Do you want me to get out and check?"

Alice shakes her head, "No, let's get back to the house. I don't have a good feeling about you out there alone. A human scent could come along and you would be lost."

Alice hits the pedal of the car causing me to pull back against my seat. She pulls into the garage hitting the button closing the garage. I hop out of the car fluttering with Alice into the house.

"Jasper?!"

Alice runs around the house sounds from the bedroom upstairs.

"He's not here!"

Alice comes down her face sad and worried, "Why can't I see anything? It's as if someone is blocking me. There's only one thing in the world that I know that can even block me and they are all the way in La Push. There's no reason they would come out this far…"

I stare at her as she walks back and forth in confusion. What is she talking about that's back in La Push? That's where Jacob lives with his father. Charlie visits there all the time.

Suddenly Alice stops moving her eyes directed at me, "Who changed you, Bella? Did you know them? Was it Victoria or someone else?"

I shake my head, "Someone else. I didn't recognize them. I thought they were going to kill me the girl said that I was special. I was somehow immune to her gift."

Alice nods her fingers at her chin as she moves once again.

"Was anyone else there with this girl? What did she look like?"

I shrug, "She was an obvious vampire with red eyes, dark black cloak, and blonde hair."

Alice suddenly stops turning toward me her eyes wide, "Black cloak and blonde hair? Are you sure?"

I nod confused by her sudden change in behavior, "Yes, I'm positive. There was boy with her too with the same red eyes and black cloak."

Alice groans shaking her head, "That's impossible. I've been monitoring the Volturi's decisions. Neither Jane nor Alec should have been in the country!"

I shrug at her behavior as she shakes her head continuously, "Then again, I have been monitoring only Aro's decisions. He probably told Jane and her group to make all the decisions."

Alice groans closing her eyes and clutching her hands together. After a few short minutes she gasps, "Something isn't right. I can't pick up Jane at all."

I move in front of Alice giving her a look, "Alice, what's going on? Do you think maybe the Volturi or whatever is after me or us?"

Alice sighs her eyes staring at the floor.

"It's possible. Jasper did say yesterday that the person he saw was in a black cloak."

Suddenly we both hear the back door of the house creak. Alice freezes as I run toward the sound only to find Jasper coming through the door. He frowns toward me noticing my posture.

"Where's Alice? What has she seen?"

Alice is at Jasper's side fairly quickly, "Where were you? I couldn't see you."

Jasper wraps his arms around Alice's small petite frame, "I'm fine, Alice. I was out waiting on you after you called. Another unfamiliar scent was in the forest but it had a slight familiarity to it. I don't know who and that's what worried me."

Alice frowns shaking her head.

"There's a reason it's familiar, Jas. Jane and Alec are the ones that changed Bella. It seems as if Bella is immune to their powers as well as Edward's. It's the only reason Jane talked Alec into helping. Jane wouldn't have been able to on her own. It's a miracle they were even able to change her and not drain her. What could be the reason they are in the states?"

Jasper sighs his gaze suddenly misty, "Peter called and it seems as if Maria, my old sire, is up to no good again. The armies in the south are even horrible now. The Volturi were called in about a month ago and they showed up in no time at all. Three armies were destroyed and a town was put at rest. Not only that, Charlotte and Peter have followed a few members of the party and they are also checking in with nearby covens. Bella, did they say anything about visiting Alaska?"

I think hard back to that night. The haze over my eyes makes it difficult to see or hear my past memories. It makes it even worse as I was still human during the most part and I was merely immobile. I couldn't really fight back nor was I even slightly a match for their incredible strength.

"Yes, it seems so. They were talking about armies in Texas. The blonde girl was complaining about being stuck in a castle for so long. She was hoping that I might cause trouble for her or something. She mentioned visiting a coven in Alaska before returning home. Wherever that may be."

Jasper nods glancing toward Alice, "You should warn Carlisle, Alice. You could say you had a vision."

Alice shakes her head, "It's too late. Bella has been a vampire for over two months now. They would have already checked in and gone back home. I'm surprised the Volturi don't already know that we weren't with the Cullens. Jane and Alec being so far out they would have sought us out just to check in. Aro wants me in his guard so he would do anything to make sure I was safe even if that meant roaming the country for centuries in order to find me."

I shake my head really confused.

"Hold up! Can someone please explain who all these people are? **He **never really explained in great detail who they are. I mean I saw a picture of them in Carlisle's office before. Aro, Caius, and Marcus are the main three that I've been told about. Who are Jane, Alec, and this guard you speak of?"

Jasper shakes his head toward Alice, "He didn't explain this better."

Alice shrugs in his arms, "He was very adamant about her not becoming one of us. He didn't want the Volturi to know about her. I suppose it's too late now as Jane and Alec are the ones that changed her."

Jasper groans pacing the floor suddenly, "Alice, do you not understand the gravity of this situation?! Jane and Alec are her sires, which means they have a certain amount of control over her right now. This is serious. Jane hasn't sired someone before as Aro doesn't approve of a new vampire being changed unless there is cause."

Alice turns toward my confused face before she begins.

"The Volturi are a family. A very old, very powerful family of our kind. I'm sure that Edward explained a little that they are what our world believes as royalty. They enforce rules and you don't get on their bad side unl-"

"You want to die." I cut her off holding my hand up, "Yes, **he **explained all of this. He mentioned something about going to the Volturi if I had died when I ran off to James. He was going to provoke them or something."

Alice lowers her gaze, "I knew it. That's why he was so secretive. He wouldn't talk to anyone and his future was all over the place. He never would make a solid decision. It's almost like when he left this last time. He was constantly vague right before he ran off. I really wish I knew where he was right now. He's running around on instinct instead of thinking and making a firm decision."

Jasper sighs as Alice takes a seat on the couch, "Like I was saying. The Volturi are very powerful. Before they came into power, there were the Romanians. They ruled for a very long time and sit still beginning to petrify. Aro is the leader of the Volturi that brought up our existence to be a secret from the humans. He claimed that humans could destroy us in time if they were given the right or ability. They took over and destroyed the castles in Romania. The Volturi reside in Volterra, Italy. They enforce rules of our world. There's really only one rule, never tell or let humans find out about what we are. Which means feeding like savages is against the law punishable by death. As Jasper said, there are newborn armies in the south that are created to win over territory. They have been like this for hundreds, possibly thousands of years. Every so often, the Volturi have to step in and slaughter vampires and humans alike to keep our world a secret.

"As you know the Volturi consists of the three main vampires, Aro, Caius, and Marcus. Aro has a gift almost like Edward's but with a slight difference. Aro has to touch a person to be able to hear every thought a person has ever had. Caius does not possess any special abilities but he's usually at the head of the punishing expeditions. Marcus has the ability to see the relationships or connections people have. For example in a group setting he can easily point out the leader or pick up on the strength of a bond between mates or friends and he can also see the weak points of that bond."

I nod taking a seat in the chair whispering, "These people are after me?"

Alice shrugs, "There's no certainty that the Volturi themselves are after you as a whole."

"Explain the guard. What's their purpose? With gifts like Aro and Marcus one would believe they wouldn't really need someone to protect them…"

Jasper chuckles, "Aro prides himself with seeking special vampires. During most of the early years, Aro began seeking out humans or vampires that he considered special. Their gifts had to be something unique and added them to his collection. He calls them his guard. The guard right now stands at nine permanent members and ten to twelve additional transitory members. Jane and Alec are the head of the guard and Aro's most prized vampires. They are twins that were changed around 800 A. D. We've heard the story many times as to invoke fear in vampires and humans alike. When they were human they had psychic abilities which caused their towns people to believe them as witches. They were burning at the stake when Aro went for them as he had discovered them years earlier but couldn't change them because of their age. When they were changed, their powers intensified a thousand times. Alec can put out a nearly invisible mist that moves slowly away from himself toward his object blanketing all the space between which cuts off all physical sense- sight, touch, hearing, etc. - from anyone, human or vampire. His gift can extend over a large group of both humans and vampires at the same time. He can control who his mist affects, allowing the other soldiers of the Volturi to kill his senseless victims easily."

Alice nods toward Jasper, "One would believe his sister was worse but Alec is much worse. You can't feel anything as they are killing you which means you could sit there for thousands of years totally cut off before they decide to finally kill you. Jane, the blonde you saw, can cause people, human and vampire, to experience excruciating pain that instantly incapacitates them. She can inflict this pain on one target at a time; she must be able to see her victim to use her gift on him or her. Demetri is another member of the guard though not as highly ranked as Jane and Alec, he's a skilled tracker. He catches the essence of a person's mind and then follows it like a scent over any distance. Chelsea can influence the emotional ties that people feel toward each other by either strengthening or breaking apart their bonds. We believe it's the only reason Marcus stays so tightly bound to the Volturi since the death of his mate. Heidi is mostly just a vampire that brings humans around for food as her gift allows it. She is overwhelmingly physically appealing to men and woman, humans and vampires alike. Her allure is possible to resist but very difficult especially if she is trying hard to attract. Renata is Aro's personal bodyguard as she can shield herself and others repelling physical attacks and confusing the attacker and making him forget his purpose. There are a few more like Felix on the guard that don't possess any supernatural abilities. Felix is probably only in the guard because of how big and intimidating he can sometimes be."

I shake my head listening to all this information.

"These people are after me or something?! Jane could easily hurt me and I wouldn't feel a thing because of Alec."

Alice stands to her feet fleeting toward my side, "Bella, calm down. Remember what you said? Jane said that you were immune to her gift."

I think back to my change before nodding.

"That doesn't mean anything, Alice. I was human then. I'm a vampire now; she may be able to hurt me. If she can't hurt me, she can hurt all of you, so can Alec. You're in danger being around me, Alice!"

Alice shakes her head her hands grabbing my shoulders, "You are in more danger alone than with us. The Volturi won't second guess hurting you, Bella. You're my sister, family or not, I will be with you watching you. If my stupid so-called brother can't get that through his skull he needs his head pulled from his body."

Alice smiles chipper suddenly, "Now, we came home so that you could hunt. It's about time we went hunting."

Jasper nods and just like that the conversation was over. I stare at Alice and Jasper seeing their love on full display. That type of love is something I crave and desire above anything in this world. I finally understand why **he **left me. It was to protect me from himself as he considered himself to be the most dangerous thing in the world.

Right now, I'm dangerous. I could easily get Jasper or Alice killed because members of Volturi had changed me. Made me immortal for selfish reasons. This Jane girl was going to ruin the real true reason I wanted to be a vampire. I could already guess that our stalker had already relayed messages back to Jane and Alec that I knew Alice Cullen as well as the rest of the Cullens. They were all in danger. It's just a matter of time before they find us and kill to get to me.

I already know that just because I'm a vampire that doesn't mean I'm no longer immune to gifts of the mind. Neither Jane, Alec, Edward, nor Aro could probably penetrate my mind. Alice and Jasper's gifts work outside of the mind and it doesn't matter if my mind is impenetrable.

I smile at Alice but in the back of my head, I'm thinking. Alice can't see anything unless someone makes a late minute decision. More like impulse and she can't see it. All I have to do is lie and say I'm going somewhere like into town and then disappear. She wouldn't know until it was too late. I won't make any rash decisions for a while. I don't want Alice or Jasper to be fishy around me.

We all walk to the back of the house Jasper on guard as soon as we step out. I close my eyes allowing myself to feel this feeling of being with them. It won't last long as I'll leave them like **he **left me.


	17. 15

15.

**One Month Later**

Staying one month longer wasn't part of the plan. Alice must have seen something because she rarely let me out of her sight. She hadn't said anything to Jasper about what she'd seen because he gave her strange looks as well. She was beginning to grate on my nerves again.

We stay inside the house most of the time. Living on the outskirts of Nashville left us no other options. The forest was rarely sought out by humans but that didn't mean there weren't times when they accidentally wondered onto the property. We couldn't risk anyone seeing us or we would be in even bigger trouble altogether.

Since Alice wouldn't let me out of her sight, I could only guess that was beginning to take it's toll on hers and Jasper's relationship. They hadn't been physical since I joined them and it seemed it was beginning to hurt Jasper more than he would let on. I'm sure my own lust a few times forced him out of the house. He couldn't blame me per say as being a newborn I didn't have much control on my emotions as more trained vampires did.

Alice was in the kitchen working on something she refused to tell anyone about. She had talked to Carlisle last week and hadn't told him about me yet because of **him**. It's just so strange thinking about them and not being able to say just his name. It would be on the tip of my tongue but even in this life it could cause me extreme emotional pain.

Jasper was upstairs in his study where he had been for a good two days. He and Alice weren't on speaking terms. Two days ago Jasper begged to go out just the two of them either hunting or just something together. I remember feeling Alice's gaze on me as she told him no they should go out with us all. It was then that I knew she must have seen something or nothing at all which always nerved her more than seeing did.

Alice hated being blind to anything. It was obvious that she wouldn't be able to deal with just being a normal vampire. I have to come to the conclusion that I possess nothing either and just my mind will always be off limits.

A simple torn book that Jasper bought while in town just a few days ago sits in my lap. Considering that I don't sleep, I've already finished the book. I'm considering asking Alice to lend me a car or allow me a trip into town alone to the local bookstore or library.

A trip into town is something I desperately need. I'm not stupid either. I need to allow Alice to gain my trust before I run. Strike when she's least expecting it so that I know I can make a clean getaway.

"Bella!"

I groan realizing I must have made a decision to ask her to go to town. That pixie doesn't miss a thing. I toss the book to the couch before slipping into the kitchen. For some reason Alice has a multitude of fabrics splashed on the counter. There's a few roles of thread, a pair of scissors, and her laptop sitting in front of her. Not to mention the three notepads on the counter displaying her latest work of fashion.

"Yes, Alice?"

She sighs looking up from the laptop.

"Jasper caught another scent last night. We out hunting while you were in the cellar. Not to mention, I haven't been able to see your future for weeks. It's beginning to get on my nerves. I hate to ask, but I can't do it on my own as I'm in the middle of an important online chat. There's a few roles of fabric at a store in town that I ordered last week. They called this morning and said it would be ready by three o'clock in the afternoon. I wouldn't ask if it wasn't important. You can even stop by a bookstore to get a few new books. You can charge as many as you want on the card as it's got no limit. Just don't scratch the car."

She pushes a set of keys across the counter returning her laptop. Huh, she can't see my future. That must mean I leave soon and whosever stalking us follows me making me blind to Alice.

I snatch up the keys flying up the stairs. I grab a jacket as well as a pair of gloves. Christmas has already past as well as New Year's which makes it January already. I'll never get used to how time really flies as an immortal.

I grab my backpack as well already knowing that I'm not going to risk leaving now. Alice is just beginning to trust me. If I leave now, I've broken that trust. I can't make myself leave when I know it'll hurt her more than anything.

"Bella?"

I jump as I was completely in my thoughts at the sound of Jasper's voice.

"Yes?"

He sighs, "I know it's a lot to ask, but could you stay gone until nightfall? I really need some time alone with Alice."

I shiver my mind filling with images of their lovemaking, "Alright, Alright. All you had to say was stay out until nightfall. You didn't have to mention that."

Jasper smirks toward me. Hastily I speed from the room entering the kitchen. Alice points toward a sticky note on the counter that I quickly grab along with the plastic MasterCard along with it. I step from the house sniffing the air slightly not sensing another scent besides mine, Jasper's, or Alice's.

I flee to the garage which takes no time at all. I find a smaller dark blue mustang in the corner. Glancing down at the keys, I notice the huge mustang emblem on the clicker. Alice. If she can't see my future than how could she know what car I would choose?

I shrug sliding in the car and backing out quickly. The address is written in Alice's elegant handwriting which is clearly saying something in itself. The town of Nashville, Tennessee always seems alive to me. There's always country music playing from the corners and everyone (mostly everyone) seems chipper with a pep in their step.

Obviously in this car, I get a few looks from a few guys. I really think they would die if I got out of the car raced them using my own feet instead of the car itself. I can go faster on my feet than this car ever could.

I locate the address fairly quickly is a surprise. The boutique is small another surprise of Alice. One would think she would use a store that's much bigger where no one would recognize her if she came here in the same physical description over the years.

I pull the visor down checking my eyes for the familiar golden color I'm so used to by now. I step out of the car clutching the sticky note in my fingers as I approach the door. Being dressed the way I am, no one could tell what I look like underneath my hoodie and gloves.

I step inside the store the smell of thread and different fabrics register to my sensitive smell.

"Hello? May I help you?"

The woman at the counter gives me a once over her eyes narrowing at my clothes. She reminds me of a human Alice. Her hair is just flowing down her shoulders and her eyes are questioning my choice of clothes.

I reach up pulling my hood from my head plastering a fake smile on my face, "Yes, you can actually. I'm here to pick up an order for Alice Cullen."

She nods pulling out a huge thick binder, "Cullen, right?"

I nod humming to her question. She shakes her head, "No Cullen, I'm afraid."

I bite my lip, "Try Alice Whitlock."

She nods her finger stopping, "Ah, yes. Alice Whitlock ordered three pink fabrics, four blue, and seven multicolor. Do you have the card in which to pay?"

I hold up the MasterCard allowing her a nice long look. She nods frowning, "Can I see some identification?"

I groan a growl wanting to escape, "Listen, I'm not Alice. She sent me here and I could careless about all of this. Just get the order or let someone else help me."

She give me a fake sweet smile, "I'll get my manager."

I shake my head pulling off my hoodie allowing my hair to flow freely and my figure to shine brightly. I hear her gasp as I pull out the small ID card Alice and Jasper had made for me.

_Bella Whitlock_

It was the only thing Alice said would work. Since I was legally dead my last name of Swan paired with Bella would be trouble. Cullen was just asking for trouble from Charlie. Since no one in my world knew about Jasper's human last name is was alright.

"Monica!" barks out a female behind her.

"I'm sure you aren't giving this woman any trouble…"

A woman with long black hair tied in a ponytail comes up behind her. She's got the nametag _manager_ on her shirt. A smirk comes to my face, "Actually, mam, she was. I'm related to Mr. Whitlock, Alice's husband. I'm here to pick up an order for Alice. Your worker here was giving me an exceptionally hard time."

The manager glances toward the girl, Monica, before nodding, "Monica, go to my office. I'll handle this order. Mrs. Whitlock is an important client."

Monica frowns before skipping off toward the office. I slide the order number over as I'm sure she needs it.

"I'm so very sorry for her rudeness. I'll give Mrs. Whitlock a discount on this order."

I smile at her nodding as lean against the counter. The manager gets the order done in no time at all. I grab the bag her surprised look on her face that I can grab it without struggling tips me off.

I frown toward her before gasping, "Thanks."

I walk out of the store after pulling on my jacket and gloves tossing the bag into the trunk. The closet bookstore is about a mile down this road. I check my phone, Alice gave me a new one, noticing for the first time there are no calls or texts from Alice. Either she was telling the truth or Jasper started early.

The bookstore is mostly empty once I step inside. The smell of leather, blood, and the crisp of the pages in the books reminds me of home. Blood is something I'm just going to have to deal with.

I start in the teen section. I grab a few thrillers, mysteries, romance, religious, as well as a few self-help books. Never know when I'll need a pick me up. I take them to the register smiling at the girl's bewildered expression. I probably grabbed about fifty or so books in one go.

"Did you find everything alright?"

I nod smiling as I hand over the card at the right time. Suddenly a slight familiar smell enters the library. I glance in the mirror spotting a flash of black before it disappears. Realizing the person's following me I quickly grab the bags of books rushing from the store. I'd never forgive myself if something happened to someone while I was in that store it'd be all my fault.

I drop the bag in the passenger seat standing to my feet. I shut the door of the car leaning against the metal. I glance toward the door of the store hearing the bell but nothing but a flash of wind do I catch. Whoever this is, they're fast. I suppose they'd have to be fast in order not to be seen on any human video camera.

I wonder if they are the reason Alice couldn't see me today, believing she was telling me the truth. Alice hardly ever lies, but then again I can't read her mind and she could very well be concealing part of the truth knowing she wouldn't be lying.

I look around before sliding back into the car. Knowing Jasper said nightfall I begin my quest to the library. There I create a card finding a place in the back with a decent book getting myself comfortable. Alice and Jasper gave me all the information about acting human so I know what's appropriate and what's not. I place my legs in a chair opening a book from the shelf losing myself in its pages.

I glance at my watch and the windows to see it dark. Pulling out my phone I find a message from Jasper.

_Get back, please. Alice is going nuts._

Chuckling, I shut the book returning to the car. In just a few weeks, I'll have to leave. Today was enough warning telling me that I'm now a danger to all of the Cullens. They never told the Volturi about me which causes a huge problem and then Jane changed me which gives her some kind of hold on me. It doesn't sound good for anyone connected to me.

I shut the car door once I shut in the engine in the garage. I grab the many bags from the trunk running toward the house.

"There you are! I was beginning to worry…" exclaims Alice as I walk through the front door.

I toss the bag of rolled fabrics toward her grinning as she glares, "I was given strict orders to stay away until nightfall. I was reading in the library and lost track of time."

Alice shakes her head mumbling, "Jasper," under her breath. She returns to the kitchen and den as I collapse on the couch. Jasper comes down the stairs fully showered grinning to himself. It's the first time I've seen a real full grin on his face the entire time I've known him. I suppose sex with one's mate would do that to you.

"How was town Bella?"

I shrug my shoulders, "eh, it was alright. I got a girl fired at the boutique and someone's following me around. All in all it was a good day."

Jasper shakes his head, "I was so sure that after you were changed all this stalking and danger would cease."

I roll my eyes folding my fingers on my stomach, "I tried to tell all of you, I'm a danger magnet. I'm almost as bad as that kid on Transformers. A bad news magnet."

Alice enters the living sighing, "Did you see anyone?"

"Just a glimpse, Alice. Nothing more than that. He was very quick."

Alice glances toward Jasper, "Who do you think they would have on her trail?"

Jasper sighs before replying, "Demetri for sure. He could pick up her trail in Florida and follow her."

I raise my hand in the air, "Didn't you both say that Demetri follows the essence of someone's mind? Couldn't it be said that he might not be able to follow my mind? Since everyone else that deals with the mind I'm cut off to, it's assumed that I would be cut off from him as well."

Jasper nods tapping his chin, "That does make sense but as of right now we just don't know."

Alice cuts in, "If not Demetri, most certainly Felix. Jane and Alec have probably already gone back to Volterra."

I sigh to myself as Jasper stands to his feet walking with Alice toward her office room. Today was enough of a statement that just proves I'm now a danger to Alice and Jasper. I'd never forgive myself if something happened to either of them because of me.

I stuff my hand into the bag of books retrieving the same one I had at the library. The book is more of a supernatural story with vampires and werewolves. That's one thing I know isn't real right now. Werewolves aren't even real or something that I've seen with my own two eyes.

Suddenly an image floats into my mind.

_Jacob Black_

Jacob is the son of one of Charlie's friends from the reservation of La Push. I knew he had a crush on me which was the number one reason I stayed away. I didn't want anyone to interfere with my relationship with **him**.

Since I've been considered dead to everyone, I wonder how Jacob is feeling to that point I wonder how Charlie is coping. He never was one to convey his emotions. Makes me wonder how he and Sue got together in the first place.

Maybe I could take a trip to Forks and just check up on them. I mean I know I couldn't go back to being the Bella they knew and not to mention Charlie wouldn't recognize me anyway. Jacob would have a hard time understanding everything anyway and I'm not ready to breach that particular subject.

The night creeps by slowly as I indulge into the book. By the time the early morning sun enters the windows, Alice and Jasper come out all smiles. I know they didn't do anything while I'm in the house as I'm like them and could hear them. They were probably doing research as usual.

"Bella, what do you think about traveling? I mean we could see the world if you wanted…"

I look up from my book staring at Alice as she grins at me, "Alice, you know we can't. We do anything that's not correct right now and this Volturi will be right on top of us. I say it's much better to be safe than sorry."

Alice pouts walking into the kitchen with Jasper hot on her trail.

"Bella!"

I sigh jumping up and running into the kitchen. My eyes widen as I take the state of the kitchen.

"Did you do this, Bella? I mean I know you don't care for my fashion as stated by your choice of clothes today, but is this necessary?"

All of Alice's fabrics have ripped, her laptop frozen, her pencils broken into splinters, and her designs ruined.

"I've been reading the entire time, Alice."

She sighs shaking her head, "Did you smell anything new, Bella?"

For being a newborn, I'm certainly not accustomed to all of the senses. Most of the time, I block them out as they are very distracting. It takes a lot to distract a vampire and with me, it's something serious.

"I cut off my senses. I get distracted by them when I'm reading. I can't help it."

Alice glances toward Jasper, "Do you smell anything?"

He shakes his head moving toward the sliding glass door, "The door has been opened for quite some time. The smell has been washed away by the scents of the forest."

Alice shakes her head, "I guess we need to change that door. I thought having a sliding glass door was a mistake."

The frown on my face has gotten worst. This won't do. I'm going to leave sooner than I had planned. Let's just hope that Alice doesn't find a way to stop me.

Time seemed to go by so fast. Another three weeks past eventful. My apparent stalker had made bold attempts to peek at me. On more than one occasion this vampire had come out in the open on a public setting but never let me actually see them. It was becoming even more annoying than it was to begin with.

Since the stalker was getting bolder, Alice had taken it upon herself to change the house. She has installed thicker doors that creaked whenever opened, locks for every single window, padlocks for the doors, bigger thicker chains for the basement doors, and a huge alarm system for both the house and the garage. I really thought she was over doing it but I never said anything. Alice could be really scary when she wanted to be.

Alice and Jasper had gone hunting last night. I toyed with the idea of leaving while they were gone but I couldn't. I wrote a note on a piece of paper in the kitchen and went shopping in town. I know I was going to leave soon, sooner than Alice would be able to see.

While in town, I thought of different things incorporating my escape. If I thought about all of these things at once, maybe Alice would be too troubled to see the one I chose in the end. I just had to remember not to make any choices or decisions to keep her in the dark. Alice doesn't realize it but it's so easy to keep her in the dark when someone wants to.

I had bought quite a few things that I didn't show Alice. I only showed her the clothes as she insisted. She was very happy by the choices I made in boots, leggings, jackets, and one dark dress. When purchasing the clothes I kept in mind to always have a piece of skin covered.

I hid the clothes for the opportune moment.

Tonight was the moment I was going to act. Alice had been chipper all day going on and on about some new piece of clothing she was creating. Jasper had talked to Carlisle instead of her telling him all about their adventures in Nashville and Texas effectively leaving me out of the conversation. I wasn't ready to allow the entire Cullen family back into my life. It was just too soon. Alice never took no as answer whenever she came around so I couldn't just tell her that I didn't want to see her.

Since Alice was so chipper Jasper thought it was the right moment to ask her to go hunting with him. I kept praying in my head that she would go and she didn't disappoint. She made me promise to lock all the doors and chain the locks as she and Jasper had keys hidden somewhere in the forest if they were in any trouble.

I got up from the couch smiling at her hugging her tightly before she scampered off out the back door. From their behavior I could only guess they would be gone all night. This was the first time they hunted all night into the daylight hours. I'd have to be quick just in case Alice had decided against staying out all night. I waited about an hour before I ran through the house.

I located my bag of things that I already packed a few days ago when Alice went into town. She had left Jasper to watch over me as if I were some child that needed babysitting. This time I wasn't going to sit by and let this vampire following me around hurt anyone else.

It was just last week, that a series of murders started taking place close to Nashville. Alice and Jasper decided to check it out one night and discovered that my stalker had been hunting in the area. Since the vampire wasn't on our diet he wasn't be inconspicuous. Alice started checking the leader of the Volturi, Aro, decisions. She thought that maybe if she kept an eye on him nothing else would happen anyway and she could see if the murders were being known by the Volturi anyway.

I quickly decided to take a shower not choosing to reveal anything else. After the shower and I fully cleaned from the soap, I changed into a simple outfit that would have even made Alice happy. A simple dark gray dress with a pair of leggings on my legs paired with a pair of boots. The flashing gray jacket that Alice had raved about covers my torso.

I enter Alice's room moving directly to her closet grabbing bags from the bottom and stuffing my clothes inside. She has a few hats hanging from hooks on the closet door which I grab knowing they'll work to cover my head from rain or anything.

I use her bathroom and a few scrunches to pull my hair up. Her supply contacts sit by the sink which I grab two handfuls of. She can always get more later when she or Jasper needs them. I quickly grab my things entering the kitchen on guard for any new scents or sounds.

I locate a piece of paper along with a pen on the counter.

_Alice, _

_I went out to hunt. See you soon._

_Bella._

Writing a simple note and not actually saying goodbye should mean that she won't see much. I locate a key under the empty cookie jar before walking out of the back door. The forest is eerie dark as I pull the door back jamming the key in the lock making sure the door is locked up tightly.

I put the key in my bag knowing that I can't make any decisions. Alice will realize by the time she gets back and I'm not here, that I left her. They can't leave me this time, I'm leaving them.

I pull the bag over my shoulder walking through the forest. I take one look behind me smiling sadly as I realize this is it.

I take off running through the forest dodging mud holes and puddles attempting to keep my clothes clean for now. Just flat out running has never been for fun to me before. Alice hasn't really let me out of her sight because of what I'm doing right now. So, I haven't really felt the wind on my face or the warmth of the sun lately because she's kept me under lock and key.

Suddenly I hear something behind me to the far left. I concentrate using my sense and my vampire strength to pin point their location and if I happen to know them. The scent is familiar but not in the way that makes me think I know them. This is my vampire stalker.

I speed up taking a detour confusing them for a change. They know I'm alone so they don't have to worry about me fighting them. I know a newborn has to deal with their own thirst and believing they could win against a much more mature vampire.

I slow to a stop turning around on my heel.

"We both know I'm alone! What do you want from me?!"

I heard the low soft chuckle as a dark black cloak figure came from the darker part of the forest. A tall lean vampire steps out of the cover of the trees dressed in a long dark black cloak covering almost his entire body. His skin has a faint olive tone while his hair is dark and shoulder length. He smirks at me just as I glance toward his ruby red eyes. The sight of his eyes brings up a cloudy human memory of James in the baseball field. His eyes give him an even slightly darker feel than he normally would have. Even after changing into a vampire the sight of red vampire eyes still elicits a displeasured shiver.

"Well, well, well. I wouldn't have thought a young newborn would leave such a protected establishment…"

His smirks widens as I notice his hands are clutch together behind his back shrugging his shoulders, "Then again newborns believe themselves to be supreme vampires. Smarter than older mature vampires."

I step back slightly giving him more room to vent whatever he needs to vent.

"I'm sure your friends have mentioned me. It seems so strange and surprising that of all the humans Jane and Alec changes for the first time it would be the one human that has connections with the Cullen clan living in Forks, Washington."

I nod my head hoping he'll get to the point quickly.

"It seems, Bella, that the humans don't evaluate their missing. It was too easy to find out all about you. Isabella Marie Swan, born September 13, 1987 in Forks, Washington to Charlie and Renee Swan. Before moving in with your mom in Jacksonville, you lived in Forks for the last half of your junior year and senior year. Living with your mom Renee couldn't have been easy as she moved around so much before she met Phil Dwyer and settled in Phoenix. It was there when she wanted to travel with Phil and you moved to Forks again. I can only guess that's where you met the Cullen coven. Recently we discovered part of the Cullens living in Alaska with their so-called cousins as they call them. In reality they are the only other coven that partakes in their specific diet of ungodly animals."

My temper spiked which isn't all that surprising considering I am a newborn.

"You don't know anything! The Cullens are stronger and better than you any day. They decided long ago they wanted to better then what they happen to be. They wanted to be known as something else besides the monster they became. You don't know the Cullens at all, you have no idea how much they suffer on that diet to be better than the monster inside."

Suddenly his hand is around my neck against a tree behind me.

"You shouldn't speak like that to your elders! I could kill you easily; decapitate you before you knew what was happening. I don't even need Felix to help me with it either. You could easily become a piece of the ground surrounding you. You're human family already believes you to be dead, we can always make that actually happen. They could even join you in the afterlife."

My eyes widen as I grab his hand attempting to push him off but he's fast. He uses his other hand to grab my waist shoving me against the tree harder. His ruby eyes glare strongly toward me, "Isabella, I'd hate to have to do something I'd regret. I've been sent here to watch you and give you some information. If you can't control yourself, I just might have to do something that would cause terrible trouble with my own coven. I'm not against tearing you apart and bringing you with me ten years earlier than you're supposed to."

I glare toward him watching him smirk tightening his grip, "One of these days it's going to be you that's going to be torn apart."

He chuckles releasing my neck shaking his head, "You certainly are something, Isabella. I'm surprised really that you have only killed two people the entire time you've changed. I suppose I'm not the only one who's noticed that either."

I shrug, "So what?! I don't care what you've noticed. I've been a vampire for about six to seven months; I don't know the first thing about being an appropriate vampire! Just get on with whatever you want from me already."

He sighs pulling his hands behind him once again, "My coven leader as I'm part of the Volturi wants you to himself. I'm the Volturi's tracker, Demetri they call me and I'm sure Alice and her mate, Jasper, have explained the Volturi and who I am in the world. The Cullens told you of our existence and then left you all alone in that godforsaken town with wolves surrounding it. You left the town though with the knowledge of our world and that is the upmost vampire law in the entire world. They broke it knowing that you would pay for their mistake as well as they would pay. You've been given the instructions of the world and you still aren't causing the destruction your sire thought you would have caused by now. The Cullens have been running around long enough believing they are indestructible. It's time for them to understand how the world works and when someone breaks the law they are punished."

I shake my head folding my arms over my chest, "They knew I wouldn't say anything! I never said a damn thing so they wouldn't feel sorry about leaving me. I'm nothing but human and they shouldn't feel guilty about leaving me."

Demetri sighs shaking his head stepping toward me, "It doesn't matter the circumstances. The biggest law of our world is to keep our existence a secret. They had two choices when you were with them. They were either to kill you or change you but they chose to leave you with knowledge of our world. They chose to break the law and they will be punished for they've done. Aro has decided that since it's an old friend in Carlisle he'll give them some time to enjoy their life. One Decade. Ten years is all they get. Ten years you'll get to be the vampire you've always wanted to be. After ten years, we'll call you in to discuss the Cullens transgressions and you'll have a chance to join us if you so desire. If we can't find you in ten years you will join the Cullens in their punishment. Then again, Aro isn't here and he did say if you became a problem to destroy you as I saw fit. Aro just believes that possibly Jane was exaggerating on your immunity to her powers."

He smirks running toward me again but I quickly dodge him watching him destroy the tree.

"Demetri is your name correct?"

He growls toward me but I nod understanding his answer, "You can't destroy me, Demetri. I can see deep within your ruby red eyes that you don't believe Jane was exaggerating when she said I was immune to her powers. Alice and Jasper explained that your power works with the essence of someone's mind. You seem extremely annoyed with me not because of who I've been with but something else. It seems that you've had to come closer to track me down because you can't get the essence of my mind. You want to destroy me because your gift is something else I'm immune to."

His growl gets louder as he steps closer to me shaking his head, "How is it that a newborn with no such powers it seems can suddenly cut herself off to me? I'm so much older than you. How is it possible?

He screams in my face as he once against forces me against a huge tree behind me his fingers cup in a claw motion. I shake my head, "You can't destroy me. You can't."

He wraps his fingers around my neck smirking, his eyes suddenly dark with thirst, "Why is that? I've been given permission to tear you apart and burn your remains if I see fit."

His hand wraps around my tighter grinning sadistically, "My mate! He's part of the Cullen coven. They only left to protect me from what they are. Something you could never do."

His eyes widen as he stares at me, "The only unmated vampire in the Cullen coven is the filthy mind reader."

"He discovered that I was his singer and that even as a human my mind was closed to him. He made them leave because the newest member tried to kill me after a paper cut."

He chuckles releasing his hold on me, "That's righteous. The veggie head's mate happens to be human. He probably wouldn't even change you. New plan."

I didn't like the way he said new plan. My hands were around my neck rubbing around for any sign of damage but I couldn't find anything. He obviously didn't do anything permanent on the outside. I can't say anything about mentally though.

"I'm sure you could find whatever you wanted about the Cullens since you're now a vampire. You are to get close to them in the next ten years and report back everything to Aro in ten years. If not, you are to stay away from them for the entire ten years. That's your decision of course but I'm sure Aro will love to hear about this. Remember Bella, we know your human family so we have our ways of making you compliant. So, what do you say?"

I gasp running through the possibilities of this deal. Once I agree Alice will probably know everything but I'm not so sure right now.

"Don't worry about the seer. She doesn't realize it but there are ways to keep things from her we don't wish for her to see. So make your decision quickly as I have more important things to do."

I lower my gaze toward the forest floor, "Deal. I'll stay away from the Cullens. If I were to join the Volturi would Aro forget about their transgressions?"

He chuckles again shrugging, "I'm not sure. He already doesn't want to kill the mind reader or the seer. The others he wouldn't mind killing even Carlisle he would kill if the time called for it. Aro isn't what you would expect young one."

I sigh as he suddenly raises his head toward the east before sighing, "Remember our deal, young one. We'll be in touch."

He turns toward the forest before taking off at quick speed leaving me alone. I tug my backpack tighter before clearing my head and taking off in the opposite direction only hoping that Alice and Jasper don't attempt to find me.


	18. 16

17.

**Three Months Later**

Three Months. Three long horrible months. Three months on my own. The forest became my friend again. It was hard to think that I had been with Alice and Jasper for five months. Living with them for so long I had forgotten what being alone actually felt like.

As I continued on, it became obvious that the forest wasn't going to be my comfort any longer. To keep Alice and Jasper off my trail I had to avoid street signs as well as places I was near. I'm sure Alice has already figured out that I left because of my stalker but there's nothing I can do. He threatened my entire human family and my immortal family as well, what was I supposed to do? I couldn't just stay with them and act as if nothing was wrong when I was putting their entire coven at risk. Rose sure would have a problem with me then. They could all just forget about me because I wasn't going back to them. I'd stay away from them for ten years and then go to Volterra and bargain with Aro. If I were to join his coven, he'd have to let the Cullen's offenses go. That would be the only way I would join them.

I had made up my mind and I'm sure Alice might have seen that choice. Then again, there are many other choices that other people have to make for themselves.

It's strange how much my life has changed again. At one time I would have begged for the silence and to be alone. That was at a time when **Edward** had left me. It's so refreshing to be able to say his name now. Saying his name that one time to Demetri seems to have lifted the restraint on my vocal cords.

I lean against another tree my memories flashing around as if they are lights blinding my vision. The surrounding forest is dark but to someone like me it's as if there is still light. I can see everything as clear as day and the sounds seem so much more alive than ever before. It's much more peaceful here than in a busy street. I lower myself to the forest floor ignoring, or at least trying to ignore, the thousands of different sounds and scents from the forest. I can feel the emotions beginning to pile up. I haven't allowed myself to think about Renee, Charlie, Phil, and all my friends both in Forks and in Florida. I've tried to block it all out as a result of never seeing them again. A face suddenly comes to my mind but in the haze it's difficult to see the features.

Suddenly, there is a muffled voice in my head recalling a memory I had long forgot about. A boy from La Push had told me of their legends about the Cold Ones. _Jacob._ I remember Jake had a slight crush or infatuation with me but never thought much about it.

He was always so joyful before I met Edward. Things got complicated after he left and things began to happen to me. I woke up and started hanging out with my friends slightly longer than it should have taken. By then, Jake was too busy with his car or friends to hang out. I tossed it to him being a teenager and probably found a girl. If only Jake was something else, maybe I might be able to have a decent friend that wouldn't get hurt. Unfortunately, that's not going to happen.

From what I remember about Jacob, he was bright and sunny all the time. It was as if a bright aura was around him at all times. He seemed to literally light up a room with his personality and everyone would smile toward him. Even when I was in his presence I could barely keep from smiling at him. For some reason I had the urge to check on all of them. They would never know I was around and it would take less than a day. Afterward, I could escape to Canada and make my way north possibly. I'm sure there was plenty of places that I could find abandoned with a decent animal population.

It wouldn't matter how long it takes me to the get there either. I could check out a few sights along the way that I've wanted to see. Although I have to stick to ones on the route and not deviate from it otherwise Alice will see everything. I nod my head grabbing my backpack and stuffing my much larger bag inside. The forest areas will dissipate once I get closer to another state.

I can only guess that I'm outside Nevada. The only reason I guess this is because just yesterday I came across a plastic bag with huge words of Las Vegas on the front of the bag. I can only hope that Alice hasn't seen this already. Lord knows she'll be here faster than I can run there. That woman has a serious gift.

I took my time leaving the forest. Another couple of days and I was gone. Like I said, the forest had disappeared. I sort of figured the lack of forest might be one reason some vampires don't stick to this part of the states much. Human drinkers probably come for the nightlife and a couple of warm necks for their drinking pleasure.

By the time I made it to Las Vegas, I was quickly realizing I shouldn't have come here. The place was huge. The TV never could show its true potential. It wasn't just that. I hadn't thought about all the junkies and the poor people on the street. There were so many chances to grab someone by the neck and drain them dry. Las Vegas truly is the city of sin because my thoughts as soon as I stepped into town were nothing but sin. I had made sure before I left the comfort of the forest to hunt until I felt sloshy and stuffed and still hunted three extra deer after that.

Apparently, I didn't think about how enticing human blood is to a newborn vampire. I held my breath digging my fingernails into my palm. My shoulder length brown hair hardly did anything anymore. I couldn't hide my face into my hair any longer.

I was walking down the sidewalk in front of a few stores catching sight of women dressed in skimpy outfits showing suggestive looks toward the passing vehicles. It was the dead of night so they didn't have to worry about kids in the cars and most men out this late were no doubt up to no good anyway.

I manage to get past the block unnoticed by the women but I can't say the same for the men in the passing cars. I hear the car before I saw it. I sought out the different scents as the car came closer and it was bizarre how I was able to tell it was a male immediately.

"Pretty Lady!"

Great. The guy in the passenger seat of a car saw me before I saw him.

I glance out the corner of my eye before quickly removing my gaze from him. His mouth was stretched open and eyes wide. With my heighten sense of smell, I could detect the alcohol and drugs on his breath and his blood stream was contaminated by the drugs themselves.

"Come on, lady! We have a good time just hop in the car and we can make your night."

A smirk came over my lips before I shake my head continuing further. Some other woman that wants his attention can get it. Otherwise, I'll make it the best night of his life once I have to drain him for every once of blood he's worth.

Another woman comes on the scene taking his attention completely. He obviously didn't care about her outside appearance as I could tell she wasn't fully a man. I decided to take a spontaneous detour down an alley between the buildings that I could smell was empty of humans. I needed to catch my breath and just breathe because my newborn instincts wanted to run back and join that car. I wanted to teach that man a lesson about women but I couldn't.

It was in the alley that I smelt it. The fresh scent of human blood floated into my nose causing my already overwhelmed instincts to go crazy. I quickly closed my senses off clutching at a pipe in the wall attempting to get a handle on my emotions and instincts. I suddenly remember Carlisle's face in my mind. Though his face was mostly blurred and hazy I could remember his compassion for human life. Whoever this human was, they were bleeding and if I could get ahold of my instincts possibly, I could help them.

Before I made up my mind, I was running at my top speed. It was a good thing too that I never slowed down as I ran otherwise someone would have seen me. I was running so fast that I was nothing but a blur if that, too quick for the human eye almost toward the speed of light I was almost that fast.

By the time I come to a stop, I was in the middle of a small crowded neighborhood. I'm honestly surprised by the long distance the blood traveled. It must have traveled over ten miles to get to where I had been. Apparently this must be where the blood started to seep out or something. The neighborhood was quiet as it was well after midnight and all lights in the houses were turned out.

I allow my senses to open up breathing to take in the scents around the place. The scent of blood almost overwhelmed me as I took off toward the exact spot where the blood was coming from. When I stopped the sight before me almost brought a demon to the surface. I saw a small girl probably no older than sixteen clutching the neck of a man against the back of a house as blood dripped down onto the ground beneath them.

I quickly cut my senses off as I was seriously tempted to throw her off and take the meal for myself. It wasn't just his body but the lifeless body of the woman on the ground that brought me out tenfold.

I quickly hid behind a house peeking around the corner remembering one of the first times I hunted with Alice and Jasper. I had attacked them because they got too close during my hunt. It was safe to say we never hunted within five feet of each other at any time after that time.

By the time she was done, I couldn't hear the heartbeat of the man any longer. I peek over the corner once again watching her pick at the pockets of the bodies. Suddenly she stood stock still a growl coming from her throat, "I know you're there. I can hear you and smell you."

I sigh stepping from the corner, "List-"

She turns around her hand at my throat quicker than I could blink, "Who are you?! What do you want?"

I shake my head gripping her hand shoving her away, "My name is Bella. I was in the city when I smelt the blood. I thought I could help…"

I take a look at her face surprised by what I find. Her eyes are blood red from human blood and her long brown hair is stained from the blood. Both her coat and gray shirt underneath have streaks of blood to the front. She shakes her head returning to the bodies, "Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you. They weren't that good anyway. Nothing but junkies."

I shiver in disgust watching her move grabbing something from the ground. She turns around showing two different backpacks on her back now, "Why are your eyes gold? I've never met another vampire with gold eyes since I was turned. Are you not a vampire or something?"

I shake my head allowing a smile to come to my lips, "I'm a vampire. I was turned about nine or ten months ago. I haven't been around a year just yet. My eyes come from my diet of animal blood."

Her eyes widen as she shakes her head, "I've never heard of such a thing. Then again, I didn't come to this life by the best means. It's only a miracle that I even survived in the first place."

She shaker head harder, seeming to be lost in some memory, before she walks past me. I turn to catch up to her as she makes her way down the street of the neighborhood.

"You could try the diet, you know. I'm a newborn probably just as you. I've only killed two people the entire ten months."

She glances toward me stopping suddenly sticking her hand out, "My name's Bree, Bree Tanner."

I take her head smiling, "Nice to meet you, Bree. I'm Bella Swan. How long have you been like this?"

She shrugs her shoulders as we walk together in the middle of the street, "I'm not sure. I ran away from home. I lived around here before and ventured to Seattle. I was homeless for quite sometime when I met someone. There was something about him that screamed danger and I guess I figured it out later. We were with a huge group around the Washington area. I haven't a real clue what we were supposed to do because after about two months the man that I had met led us into the forest and made us wait there. We never heard from him again and it was for two days when everyone was so thirsty and a group of campers were about five miles west of us. We destroyed that group and everyone fled. A few got too close to others while feeding and were killed because of it. For me, once everyone had left, I drank from two people and then ran for cover. I was terrified. Took me about five months to get down here around this area. I've discovered an abandon house deep in the surrounding area of Las Vegas. It won't take long to get there and we can talk if you want."

I smile at her nodding thankful to no longer to be alone. Bree seems like a nice person with a good heart underneath. I feel as if some unknown force is bringing us together as it should be.

"That would be wonderful, Bree."

She smiles wiping the access blood from her face and pulling the straps tighter, "To get out of town unnoticed, we have to run. At this time of night, it won't cause trouble. Most men out this time of night are drunk or high and the women only care about the money in the junkie or alcoholic's pocket. I just hope you can keep up."

She grins before taking off laughing the entire time. I grin fixing my jacket zipper tighter and tugging the strap tighter before running to catch up.

The lights of the city were barely specks in the sky by the time we made it to the house she had found. She sighs smiling over her shoulder, "It's not much, but it's home."

I follow her inside noticing the door is completely missing. The house has most obvious signs of distress with broken windows and doors everywhere.

"I know it's horrible but it's the only place I've got right now."

I nod following her through the small house toward a back room. She opens the door revealing two mattresses on the floor with holes and springs sticking from the top.

"We can talk in here. It's the only decent room in the entire house. The windows haven't been broken in here."

I nod pulling my backpack from my back tossing it toward the mattress against the left-side wall. I can hear her also getting ready as I finally remove my jacket sighing in relief to have the thing off for once. I kick off the boots as well collapsing on the mattress sighing in contempt.

"So…" says Bree her voice slightly off.

I open my eyes sitting up quickly, "Yes?"

She shrugs as I notice she is sitting indian style on the bed, "I just wanted to apologize about getting in your face. My hunting instincts were still on and I was dealing with that at the same time."

I smile guilty toward her, "It's my fault. I attacked a few of my own friends during hunting before. I should have known not to get so close. How long have you been here? Why Las Vegas?"

She sighs twisting her fingers around, "I've been here in this shack for a good six months, I guess. It was Nevada that I lived in my human years. I suppose it was a subconscious act to come here to feel slightly closer to my human life. I've only come across a couple of other vampires but none have been the type that wants to create a coven. Most others prefer to travel alone unless they have a mate or something."

I nod smiling, "Why do you think you were changed?"

She shrugs, "The man that got me in the alley wasn't the one that changed me. That I know for sure. He didn't last very long for some reason. He was a smaller guy with red hair and I believe he either ran off or he was killed by the others. I know for certain that a woman with red hair was the one that changed me and she created another second in command. He wasn't very nice at all. I suppose it was because she didn't come back from something that we were abandoned there in that forest."

"Well, I suppose you didn't have the best upbringing."

She rolls eyes shrugging, "It's better than some. I've met a few vampires that actually had to fight in vampire wars. It wasn't very pretty for most of them."

"I guess I should tell you about myself. How I came to my diet and everything."

I explain my human life of how I moved to Forks with Charlie. I tell her about my life with the Cullens and how their attitude toward what they are made me want their diet. It was hard to tell her about when **Edward** left but I managed. I told her about my life in Forks afterward. It took me a long time to come out of my depressed state and by then most of my friends wouldn't have anything to do with me. Angela and Ben were the only ones that actually wanted to have anything to do with me.

College was another hard thing. I had made close friends and just lost them in the blink of an eye. I told her about who changed me and then finding Alice and Jasper again. I made sure not to tell her about my stalker or about the ten year agreement with the Volturi. I was mostly afraid she might not want to have anything to do with me because of my problem of the Volturi. It was obvious she didn't know about the Volturi to begin with and I didn't want to scare her.

I lower my gaze, "So, now you know. How old were you when you were changed?"

I risk glancing up toward her face, "I was sixteen. Just beginning my life. It's my own fault because I ran away from home. My father was abusing me and I'm pretty sure now that he killed my mom anyway."

"You're lucky you got out when you did. You have eternity to live your life the way you want."

She groans shaking her head, "I'm always going to be plagued with a thirst I can barely control."

"Why don't we stick together? We can create our own coven together. You could try the animal diet. It will be hard and we'll probably have to stick to forest but I'm sure you could do it."

She smiles suddenly hopping from her bed and running toward me. She wraps me in a hug and I can feel the sobs racking her body, "You have no idea what this means to me, Bella. I'll try your diet. Maybe if I can control my thirst we can help bleeding humans. So, what's your plan?"

I bite my bottom lip sighing, "Before I met you, my plan was to check in on my human family. I look so different from when I was human so they won't recognize me too much. I can keep to the forest and they won't see me. Then, I was planning to head north into Canada. I've never been that far before and Canada has forests that we can hunt in. I'm sure there are some abandon houses in the forest that we can use for a little while."

She nods smiling, "That sounds great. We'll have to get some new clothes if you want to travel that far. The humans that I killed had some money in their pockets and a few credit cards. We should only use the cards once or else the card companies will discover something's wrong."

I stand to my feet nodding, "I most certainly need out of these clothes for once. I've brought clothes with me but I could really use a shower."

She grins nodding checking the wallets she got, "There's about three hundred in one and another two hundred in the other. I say we get a hotel, something cheap. We can clean up and watch some real TV before heading for Washington."

"Are there any motel six in Vegas?"

She chuckles shaking her head, "There are a few but you don't want to go there. That place is the spot for prostitutes."

I shiver in disgust nodding, "Okay, lets try another town besides Vegas. We need a computer."

"There are free ones in a couple of the casinos. I can't go in there though. It's way too many heartbeats in one place. I went in there before and wound up killing about three people in their rooms. Men these days."

I shake my head smiling, "Alright, I have control. As long as no one gets too close we'll be alright. Do you think you could wait somewhere for me? We'll have to leave as soon as I get out as we don't have much time to waste."

She nods quickly running around the house grabbing her things. I slip my feet inside my boots following her toward the front door.

"Do you have any powers, Bella?"

I glance toward her shrugging, "I'm not sure. I told you as a human a vampire couldn't read my mind and neither could one of my sires use their power on me which dealt with the mind. I could have a power but I don't know what it might be."

She smiles, "You're lucky, I think. You might have a power. Super self control and another power it seems. I don't have anything it seems."

I nod as we step outside. The sun is rising and I completely forgot about the sparkling of our skin."

Bree mutters under breath, "Damn. The sun is the reason I hunt at night. Someone might think something is up if I'm sparkling during the day."

I bite my lip shaking my head, "I might have to go by myself. We'll have to cover up completely if we both want to go into town."

She nods biting her lip, "I have fingerless gloves and a beanie for my head, but nothing for my face."

I pull my backpack over the front of my body, "I have some shades that should redirect some of the sunlight. A few scarves might also do the trick."

I toss her a pair of shades and a thin scarf, "I hope those will work."

She slides on the shades and wraps the scarf around her head grinning widely, "This is perfect. It hides my eyes as well."

I nod wrapping my head in the scarf as well along with the shades before we take off toward the city. Las Vegas during the day doesn't seem as lively as at night. We slow to steady walk a few blocks from a casino and hotel.

"This doesn't even seem like the same place really," I whisper knowing she'll hear me.

Bree chuckles, "Yeah, it's obvious. This casino has a computer room for you to use. It shouldn't take too long."

I nod smiling at her locating a spot where she can stand without being noticed too much, "Just stay right here. I'll go in alone since I can control myself better."

She nods smiling at me shooing me off, "Go on. We need to get in a hotel quickly. I haven't had a shower in months."

I nod quickly leaving her moving toward the hotel. I receive quite the looks from passerby's as I approach the automated doors. I cut off my sense mere seconds before I enter the hotel/casino. Most places on the strip or nothing but casinos and hotels, which did not really surprise me too much.

The scarf was wrapped around my head and my entire body was covered by clothing as to not risk my skin shimmering in the sunlight. There was a woman behind the counter at the front of the hotel so I quickly figured she might be able to point me in the right direction.

"Excuse me?" I stood at the counter knowing that since I am covered she will not be forced into anything.

She gives me a smile, "Would you like a room?"

I shake my head, "No, actually, I heard that you have computers that the public could use. I just wanted to use the computer for a moment."

She nods smiling, "The computers are just down that hall. They are by the pay phones past the lounge."

I nod turning down that appropriate hall. The computer room is the first room past the lounge and it is empty thank goodness. I take the closest computer system to the door quickly searching for smaller towns just outside of Vegas. There are not very many small cheap hotels close to Vegas so I broaden the search. Maybe a different state altogether might be better.

I count out the miles we will have to travel to get into Arizona. There are a couple of cheap motels in Arizona that we can check in. The rates are seriously cheap so we can stay there for a few hours possibly overnight and then leave. I need to check in on Forks, on Charlie, and on Jacob. I need to see with my own eyes that they are safe and happy going on with their lives without me.

I check out of the computer allowing my senses back on. The wonderful scent of blood floats toward my nose as I immediately shut my senses once again. It smells as if someone might be shooting up in one of the rooms of the hotel as the blood is mixed with a high scent of multiple drugs. I shake my head jogging out of the room only to be stopped by a huge crowd. The cameras in the building would catch my blur so I am forced to shove my way against the crowd. A few of the men cop a feel causing me to growl as I knee one of them between the legs lightly enough for him to get the message and not to damage him too badly.

The place a left Bree outside of the hotel is empty. I shake my head groaning as I close my eyes taking in scents. Bree's scent is different then anyone else I have met before so I could know it when I smelt it again.

The overwhelming scent of blood forces me to run as the scent is fairly close to the spot I left Bree. I hide myself on the side of the closest building watching Bree drain a middle age man against the building once again. He does not look well as his skin is pale and with my advance eyesight, I can see needle wounds along his arms.

I use my hearing to keep the coast clear so that Bree can feed and not worry too much about someone coming up on her. I heard the familiar thud of the body as I watched her lick up the access blood on her lips and his neck.

"Bree?"

She growled before she calmed down her eyes downward, "I'm sorry. It was overwhelming when I smelt it."

I nod smiling, "It's alright, Bree. It happens to all of us. Do not forget that I killed two people I actually knew shortly after I was first changed. The few months of my vampire life was spent in the forest, avoiding humans. It's uncomfortable to cut off my senses but sometimes it's necessary."

She sighs nodding, "So, what did you find?

"The only place is quite a journey. We will have to travel into Arizona for a cheap hotel. I say not to stay overnight as it is too much temptation around the hotel. People could shoot up and we could have blood on our hands again."

Her head whips toward the street ahead of us before she groans, "We have to get rid of this. I know we have to make sure that we clean up after ourselves. Maybe if we run with the body we can destroy a crime scene of sorts."

She grabs him throwing him over her shoulder grinning, "Do you think you could find us a lighter? It is better to burn the body and leave no evidence. If we leave him in the middle nowhere it will take longer for someone to find him."

I give her a look shaking my head, "You've done this before?"

She shrugs, "Once or twice."

We both take off running out of Vegas completely the rays of sunlight glaring down on us. Bree stops allowing me to steal a lighter from a passerby. Bree managed to find a mostly deserted part of a small town where a dumpster was located. With the overwhelming smell of drugs around the dumpster, we thought it was the best place to dump the body of the man knowing someone would think another druggie killed him or it was possibly an accident.

"So, do you want to run straight there now?" Bree asks as we merge in with the main part of the town.

I shrug my thirst beginning to spike, "I haven't hunted in a couple of days. I am getting thirsty again. We need to find a forest with high population of deer or something."

Bree frowns shaking her head, "I don't know a big forest population. There might possibly be a population in Arizona. We could search there."

I nod cutting off my senses, "We need to go. If we come across any humans, I might not be able to control myself. Let's go."

Bree nods fastening her bag and tightening her scarf around her head. We both take off in the direction of Arizona. Hopefully we can make it to Arizona with me having an accident as Bree.

**_Author's Note:_**

_Bree's past is mostly the same as the books with minor differences. Riley was in the army but he wasn't the center as in Eclipse. He was a minor person in the army and Victoria had a different person. Remember she was killed and that was why they were left alone in the forest afterward. She didn't give the order and her second in command was killed with her in surveillance. So I hope that Bree's background gets everyone excited. I always wanted a better ending for Bree. Maybe she'll get a better ending this time around._

_Please review! Thanks! _


	19. 17

**_17._**

The hotel was small and dilapidated. I could tell that Bree didn't want to stay here for any reason. I made her a compromise locating another hotel that was still small but wasn't nearly as bad. Bree hadn't used a shower in the past eight months so I decided we would both shower after hunting.

I wasn't comfortable leaving Bree alone in the hotel. Leaving her alone in Vegas hadn't been a good idea at the time and I didn't want a repeat. My thirst had skyrocketed over the course of the trip to the hotel so I sent Bree into the building to get the room.

She came back empty handed smiling brightly at me and I knew she hadn't killed anyone in the short time span. I had given her the money and the bags so she could put them in the room. My thirst was so bad I was holding my breath constantly for I was afraid someone else would become victim to the both of us. If I hunted someone Bree would attack me for the blood herself. It's just vampire survival after all.

"Ready to hunt?" Bree asked but I could tell she was apprehensive about this new diet.

"Don't worry, Bree. The diet will be hard and it will probably take decades to master and get used to but if you stick with it, you'll do it."

Bree nods the smile slipping off her face, "Will it taste like human blood?"

I frown shaking my head, "Not all animals taste good. The carnivores are the closest to human blood but they aren't as satisfying. We'll have to be careful because this diet is like a human on Tofu, it keeps you sated but you're never fully satisfied."

Bree sighs nodding, "I'll try it. I've never been the type to not try something so let's do this."

We both take off locating a decent forest area populated with animals. Unfortunately, the only thing I smelt were deer and that wasn't going to be the best for Bree. We both fed from a few deer but I could Bree wasn't nowhere near sated. We conversed about traveling further and coming back to the hotel hoping for a few carnivores further out. She agreed considering we had paid for the hotel for a good week and we took off again.

Fortunately, we traveled about three hours through the area and located a semi populated area of different carnivore animals.

Bree finally seemed sated and wanted to walk through the forest. She hadn't before and wanted to give it a try and we could get back to the hotel later.

"So how was it?" I asked glancing at Bree out the corner of my eye.

She shrugs a disgusted look coming to her face, "The deer was horrid but the carnivores were much tastier."

I grin nodding, "I tried to explain. There are worst things out there. Deer only taste bad because they're herbivores eating only plants and stuff. Humans are carnivores and herbivores but mostly carnivore which is the reason those animals taste different from each other."

We talked about other things mostly about what we wanted to do with eternity. I kept most of the conversation on Bree as I thought about everything. What would happen to Bree when my decade was up? Who would keep her on the diet and keep decent humans out of her sight? I needed to find another vampire coven that would help Bree stay on the diet when I was gone.

I tried thinking about conversations I had with Alice and Edward. They mentioned only one other vampire coven that practiced the vegetarian diet. The Alaskan coven, the Denali's, were the only other coven besides the Cullen's that kept to the animal diet.

If something happens to me I'll have to leave something so that Bree isn't alone in the world. I can't go to them now because there was a chance that the Cullen coven could be with them now.

Bree started to get restless walking around so we headed back to the hotel. I decided to allow Bree to shower while I sat on the bed thinking. She was grinning to herself searching through the clothes that I brought with me. It was during her search that I realized us both needed new clothes from a store. I told her that tomorrow when it was day time we would go out and get some clothes.

Bree agreed with me and she pulled out the cash we both had. It wasn't much and we would probably have to steal someone's money soon to get some more.

"We could try the ATM, people are always easier that way," said Bree managing to find some shampoo and bath necessities

I shake my head at her, "We can find some money at a store. I've been to a few stores before and people don't keep an eye on their wallets or purses."

She sighs nodding, "Alright. We can go tomorrow as you said. We'll have to keep covered as well."

She slipped into the bathroom and I immediately felt guilty. There's just so much on my mind right now and I seem to be spaced out quite a bit. I stood to my feet grabbing an old book from my bag and stepping outside on the concrete.

The moon sat in the sky shining down brightly and I wondered for a moment what Alice and Jasper were doing. Alice would never give up that I knew so I barely made any decisions. I decided to allow Bree to make most of the decisions since I knew Alice wasn't looking in her future but she was mine. I could only assume that possibly Alice had seen a couple of visions concerning my future from the beginning. She might try to search Arizona or Vegas because those were my decisions but from now on, Bree was choosing everything. I would allow her to choose the routes we would take so that Alice couldn't see anything.

I walk down the concrete sidewalk toward the front office. The office was close and locked, stating on the board on the door that there is a shift change coming up. I shrug my shoulders pulling out the phone I had found before meeting Bree. I'll probably let Bree decide to travel to Forks for some reason so that Alice can't see our travels.

I ran through the town locating a small coffee shop smiling to myself stepping inside. The coffee shop is mostly deserted but in an hour, it will be bustling once again.

I nod at the boy behind the counter who looks like he's on caffeine high since he works the late shift. I get comfortable in the corner reading the familiar pages of Pride and Prejudice.

Bree grins at me sitting beside me in the coffee shop. We've already been shopping and gathered new clothes. We managed to find a few outfits that won't tear during our travels through forests. Bree was a little upset about leaving the hotel so soon but I had a feeling that Alice might show up soon. It was my choice to travel to Arizona so she would be in the area soon. I'm not stupid, as some would believe so Bree and I have to leave quickly.

Bree wanted to listen to the poetry reading and then we were leaving. Bree giggled at one of the poems while I rolled my eyes. I was impatient to get out of here. I needed to talk with Bree about her making the decisions on our trip to Washington state.

Finally, the poetry reading was over and Bree groans as we manage to take the back way out.

"So, what now?" Bree asks frowning as we walk down an alley.

I sigh shrugging, "I want to get to Forks, but there's a hiccup. I need you to make the decisions on what route to take and everything. I can't take any chances."

Bree turns her head staring at me, "What's going on?"

I groan shaking my head, "There's a vampire following me that can see the future. She'll be able to see my decisions as soon as I make them. I can only guess that she's on her way to Arizona since it was my decision to come here."

Bree nods, "You still want to see your family?"

I nod sighing, "I'd like to. You have to choose everything, the routes, how long we stay, and where we stay."

Bree grins, "That actually sounds pretty fun. We should get going now, right? We can get into the state by morning and run all night. If we stick to the forest we can also hunt on the way."

I grin at her nodding, "How about we strap these bags around our torsos? Otherwise they'll get in the way."

Bree agrees with me and we walk out of the alley. A few people glance at us strangely but I ignore it only too accustomed to the stares. We converse about a few things on the way Bree bring up new cell phones and laptops.

"I mean I can guess that this vampire that sees the future might be the one you were living with. She'll probably know the number to the cell you took. We should get new ones and find way to make them untraceable. A laptop would be good too, so we can find hotels in small towns along the way. If we stay in the forest the entire time, we'll eventually get dirt and that will cause more looks than usual."

I nod sighing, "That sounds great. Do we still have any of the money from that woman in the dressing room?"

Bree grins nodding, "That woman had at least three hundred dollars in her wallet. There were three credit cards in that wallet. I can only guess she hasn't turned them off yet. All she cared about in that store was them giving her what she needed. That fur coat looked a little hot for her and she was trying on other things."

I shake my head attempting to hide a smile. Bree thought she was a great mark because there was a black SUV outside on the curb of the store. The people inside were waiting on her hand and foot as she barked out thousands of orders. She left her bag on the bench in the dressing area while she was on the phone and trying on clothes. Since the attendants were waiting on her and doing what she said quickly no one paid attention to us even though we could tell they wanted to. That woman started barking worse orders once we stepped in so Bree and I decide on impulse that I would be the distraction.

The woman kept an eye on me out the corner of her eye but she never looked twice toward Bree. I could only guess that she saw me as a bigger threat because I was closer to her age. Anyway, we managed to get a few good credit cards that aren't going to max out too quickly. We can get new phones and laptop for our trip and even more.

Bree locates an electronic store slipping in grinning. I choose another store for cell phones with one card so that we can keep the cash. Bree wanted a couple untraceable phones so I bought two touchscreen phones with a thing on the back so that it bounces off different cell towers never grabbing just one.

Bree smiles as she steps out with both a laptop box along with a laptop case strap over her shoulder.

"Perfect laptop. Wireless connection and everything. There's even a webcam installed in the top."

I shake my head smiling tossing her the box containing her phone and tower scrambler. She smiles grinning nodding her approval, "This is great. It's not exactly untraceable but with what we have it's the best we can get."

We manage to get the laptop strap around one of us and stuffing our phones into our pockets. Bree smiles glancing around, "I say we get going now. We stick to deep forest away from interstates until morning. It's going to be hard to stick to the diet in the forest. To get to Forks, we'll have to stick to forested areas away from humans since people might recognize you. Do you think we could die your hair or something? It might help…"

I shake my head against the idea, "No, I'm not doing that. I just want to see my father from afar and a couple of other people. That's it though."

I remember the treaty that the Cullens have with the people of La Push. Bree's eyes will take a good deal longer to change to gold. I can't go over and see Jacob from afar with her so I'll need to ditch her somewhere. She can't be with me because of her eyes.

We glance over our shoulders relieved to be void of stares. Bree enters the forest with me on her tail, as I make zero decisions in my head. If I'm lucky, I'll be in and out of La Push quickly so that Alice can't see a single thing.

Bree sniffs the area before grinning at me, "Let's go."

We take off through the forest laughing to ourselves. We avoid California at all costs because Bree has made this trip before. California will be a big place that we'll gain attention for sparkling in the sunlight. About five hours of running and Bree wants to take a break. Since she's the one calling the shots, I agree leaning against a tree still amazed by the fact that I don't feel winded.

"I'm thirsty. Since I'm used to humans I'll need to hunt more frequently."

I nod taking a seat on the forest floor, "Go ahead. I don't need to right now. I'll hunt later in another state."

Bree sighs nodding, "I'll be back. If you need me quicker, call me."

She takes off west probably tracking down the pack of wolves in the area. I'll never understand the deal some have with wolves. They actually don't taste all that great to me even though they hunt other animals most of the time. Then again maybe she'll follow them and attack their prey instead as I've seen her do it before.

I close my eyes allowing myself to reminisce like something I've never done before. Edward's face fills my vision causing a startled gasp to rack through my body. I squeeze my eyes shut tightly shaking my head refusing to allow myself to indulge in that feeling.

I sit in the same spot frozen until Bree comes back. The temperature feels as if it's cooled off since the sun has set as I bolt up hearing the break of a stick ahead of me.

"Whoa, Bella! It's just me Bree. We need to get going the sunset about an hour ago. I thought you would have messaged me. I was so thirsty that I almost left you out of state following a buck. Let's get going."

I nod mechanically grabbing my things from the ground running beside Bree. The rest of the trip is quiet and Bree decides against stopping again until we hit the state of Washington. Something seems the matter with Bree though that I can't quite figure out. We finally make it into Washington by around ten in the morning considering Bree only allowed us a few minute breaks through the entire trip.

"Well, we can travel slowly. I believe you'll want to see your dad during the day so we'll have to be careful."

During the trip, we had changed clothes and we would change again before we entered Forks.

"So, do you want to head to Forks now or wait?"

I shrug glancing at her, "You're the one making the decisions. It's your choice. Just remember we can't stay in Forks more than a couple of days."

Bree nods grinning as she clutches the laptop bag, "How about we find a hotel in Forks and chill there? We can use the Wi-Fi and possibly find someone that can make false ID's and such."

I nod following her into a small café with free Wi-Fi. Bree grins sitting down but I can see the slight nerves in her face. We hunted three times before we came here and a mere had past since Bree had hunted until she felt sloshy. Unfortunately, since she's so new to the diet being around humans will be hard.

I decide to bring up her strange behavior in the forest, "What was the deal in the forest? You've been acting strange ever since."

Bree glances over the top of the laptop shrugging her shoulders, "It was nothing. The animals tasted funny again and the horrid taste was in my mouth."

I shake my head staring at her, "I'm not stupid, Bree. There was a camping troop wasn't there?"

Bree sighs lowering her gaze, "I was feeding from a deer when I smelt them. It wasn't so much as a troop with kids. They were all adults. I was still thirsty and in hunting mode so I ran attacked before I knew what I was doing. I didn't want to cause a forest fire so I set the scene as if animal had killed them. I tore their limbs off and made it as if a lion or something had attacked them. I was ashamed and that's the reason I didn't tell you anything."

I reach my hand over rubbing her hand, "Don't worry, Bree. You never have to be ashamed. I cheated before when I had first changed so don't worry. I'll probably slip again just like you."

Bree smiles at me, nodding her head before typing away on the laptop. She finds two different hotels in the Forks area but according to the internet, they are full. I quickly decide that we should find a hotel in Port Angeles or Seattle so that we can be far away.

I let Bree choose everything from the hotel to what city we would stay in. It wasn't a huge surprise when she chose Port Angeles considering it was closer to Forks that Seattle. We left the café with our bags taking off to Port Angeles. It took a couple of hours to get there and I let Bree go and check us in. She came back out and needed to hunt and I trusted her. I figured she could hunt on her own and if she had an accident, she could choose if she wanted to tell me or not.

I dropped the bags to the bed finding some loose clothes. A pair of black jeans, a yellow collar shirt, and a pair of boots all paired with a brown sweater. I entered the bathroom shutting the door behind me and tossing the clothes to the counter by the sink.

I filled the tub with nothing but hot water since I knew I wasn't going to burn and my cold skin would cool it anyway. I lowered myself into the tub since it was huge tub; I even went under the water. I stayed like that for probably a couple of hours before I decided to start actually washing. Bree was still gone by the time I stepped out of the tub.

I pulled my clothes pulling out my phone wondering where she was. I didn't want to risk something happening to my only companion.

_Whr r u?_

I sent the text before I pulled the laptop. I still had an email even though I had deleted the old one. Alice knew this one so I knew there was a chance she might have sent me something to this one. I was right though of course both she and Jasper had sent different messages. I marked them as read and put them in a folder but never actually read them. I couldn't read them right now, I had no choice. I had to stay away from them to keep them safe.

The door opens and Bree runs in her eyes ablaze.

"We have to leave, right now."

I raise my head staring at her moving quickly around the room, "What's going on?"

"There were a couple of vampires on my trail in the forest. I had to run because they were feeding from a couple of humans. I held my breath like you said but they heard me and started following me."

I shake my head grabbing her wrists, "Bree, this is your decision, but think about it first. Shower and then we'll head off and come back later. If they have gifts I'm sure they work on us, I can save us both."

I wasn't sure what my gift was but I knew it was something against mind powers. I was sure if I worked hard, I could protect Bree with my life. If I had to give myself up for her, I would. I felt very maternal over her for some reason and it pushed me into certain roles with her.

Bree was quick in the shower and she changed her clothes. I helped her gather her hair into a bun so we could put a hat on her head. We hadn't been using contacts much with Bree because we had been in the forest and I'm sure the woman at the desk thought her red eyes were contacts to begin with anyway.

I handed her a pair of dark green contacts that I had picked up before I met Bree. We put on clothes that would conceal her appearance and even pulled gloves on her hands while I did the same. I wasn't too comfortable with all the cover-up but we had to do something. I was curious who they might have been but Bree was worried about it majorly.

We traveled in cover of nightfall toward Forks. We didn't have another encounter then with her stalkers. I shrugged it off as Bree and I hunted during our trip. By morning, we were sitting in the wooded area across from Charlie's house.

I watched the house while Bree leaned against a tree beside me.

"This is the house you lived in before Florida?"

I nod sighing, "Yeah, it is. I lived here about a year a couple of months. Charlie, my dad, is the chief of police here so we have to be mighty careful."

The door to the house opened and my eyes widen. Charlie stood on the steps of the house with Sue Clearwater smiling at him. She handed him a brown paper bag with a smile on his face. He pressed a kiss to her lips before glancing over her shoulder. It was then that I listened closely to the heartbeats in the house.

Including Charlie and Sue there were four heartbeats in the house. I assumed the other two heartbeats were Sue's children, Leah and Seth Clearwater. Charlie left Sue toward his cruiser slipping inside waving to Sue as he backed out.

"He looks happy…" whispers Bree toward me.

I nod turning toward her giving a small smile, "He does, and I'm glad. I was afraid he would be sitting around crying over my death."

Suddenly we heard the back door opening Bree was on alert because we weren't very well covered. Sue was standing at door as Seth walked out in nothing but a pair of shorts. Bree stares over at him shaking her head, "What's going on?"

I shrug shaking my head, "Hell if I know, Bree. I'm as confused as you."

As Sue and Seth are talking about something that I don't want to invade in, Leah comes jogging up behind them a sour look on her face.

"I'll be happy when that horrid vampire smell is out of this house. It's giving me headache," growls Leah as she shoves past her mother and brother.

I turn toward Bree my eyes widening, "She smells us…"

Bree nods as we stare at Seth who shakes his head, "I don't smell it that bad in the house, Leah. It was a lot worse last year. Then again that smell is stronger out here."

Sue shakes her head at her children before sighing, "Remember to tell Sam that I'd like to see Emily soon. I mean I am her family too. That child is part of me too, so I should get to see him."

Leah rolls her eyes, "Sure mom, Seth will do it. Jacob will need us to keep the barrier. The Cullens could come back anytime now that she's dead and gone. Stupid bloodsuckers. Let's go, Seth. I'm missing my senior year of high school for this shit."

Seth shakes his head hugging his mother and kissing her cheek, "We'll be back tomorrow, mom. I'll probably stay Sam and Emily. Leah will probably stay in the woods."

I watch Leah dressed in a thin tank top and stretch shorts but she was barefooted. She was staring at the wooded area the exact spot we were now hiding behind trees and limbs while sniffing.

Her eyes widen as she turned toward Seth and Sue, "Mom, get in the house now! Seth, let's go. I smell vampire close by."

Seth helped his mother into the house making sure she closed the door and locked both doors before he followed his sister. My eyes never strayed from Leah as she began shaking and her body trembled. Bree gave a startled gasp as Leah's clothes suddenly shredded in midair but she landed in full wolf form. It was then that the story that Jacob had told me resurfaced.

_"Another legend claims that we descended from wolves – and that the wolves are brothers still. It's against tribal law to kill them. Then there are the stories about the __**cold ones**__."_

_"Werewolves have enemies?"_

_"So you see, the cold ones are traditionally our enemies. However, this pack that came to our territory during my great-grandfather's time was different. They didn't hunt the way others of their kind did – they weren't supposed to be dangerous to the tribe. So my great-grandfather made a truce with them. If they would promise to stay off our lands, we wouldn't expose them to the pale faces."_

I turned toward Bree quickly, "Run, they'll kill us. If they see me, they might stop because I know them."

Bree nods quickly taking off at her highest speed just as Leah enters the forest. I take another direction hoping that if I can get to Seth he can stop Leah. Their paws hit the ground roughly causing the entire ground to shake as I double around entering Seth's eyesight.

It seems they can communicate as he takes a couple seconds before following me. I slow down once I come to a huge wide ravine. I turn around hearing Seth growl and snarl at me I see the recognition in his eyes before he stops growling.

"Hey, Seth."

He whimpers before shaking his head and continuing to growl as I speak, "Seth, it's Bella. I'm like the Cullens, Seth. I don't kill humans, my eyes are golden. Leah is about to kill my friend, my companion, and I can't let that happen. She's trying the animal diet but it hasn't been long enough for her eyes to change."

Seth's eyes glance away for a moment before he shakes his head stepping forward. I begin to bite my bottom lip realizing my immortal life is about to be cut shorter than I realized. I close my eyes attempting to think of some way out of this entire situation. Suddenly I hear a whimper forcing my eyes wide open as I find a russet wolf in front of me growling toward Seth's wolf. He growls back shaking his head and I can tell that they are arguing in their heads.

My hearing widens further out but I can't hear Bree or Leah's wolf any longer. Suddenly I turn toward the area behind Seth and the other wolf to see a gray growling Leah behind Bree who's freaking out by the look on her face. She speeds toward me her arms wrapping completely around me shaking dry sobbing in crying the only way a vampire can really cry.

The wolves suddenly cease growling as the russet wolf leaves to the cover of trees. Leah stands her ground staring at us her eyes narrowed. I hear something from the behind the trees just as Bree pulls her face from my neck and shoulder.

Suddenly someone comes from the trees as my eyes widen seeing a familiar face, "Jacob?"

He looks different now that I can see him for what he is. His skin is much darker as if he's constantly been in the sun. He's completely barefoot dressed in only a pair of light blue jean shorts.

"Hey, Bella. It's good to see you, even if you are technically undead."

I roll my eyes glancing between Seth and Leah, "We meant Charlie and Sue no harm. I only wanted to check in on him and you, Jake. You're both my family and I just didn't want to not see you one more time."

Jacob sighs nodding, "I understand that, Bella. We've got some questions for you. I'm second in command of the pack so everything you tell me goes straight to Sam. Paul was in wolf form when he heard and sent me. Rachel is in the hospital they don't know when she's going to give birth. Her water broke but she's not having bad enough contractions for the epidural."

My eyes widen as I shake my head, "Rachel's having a baby?"

Jacob grins nodding his head that smile I love so much on his face.

"She and Paul are engaged to married shortly. Her pregnancy was a shock but Paul quickly stepped up and proposed. So, the most obvious question, who changed you? Did the Cullens find you?"

I lower my gaze toward the ground as Bree rubs my shoulders, "It's alright, Bella, tell him."

I sigh nodding meeting Jacob's eyes head on, "It wasn't the Cullens. I was in the forest after I had run because of a horrible meeting with the grief counselor. I had escaped to the forest because I missed Forks and the forest. It wasn't deep or thick, I thought, but I managed to get deeper than I wanted. I had fallen asleep after crying myself out and woke to the dead of night. My cell phone was going dead and I didn't have much signal. I grabbed my things and checked the time before attempting to travel back to the college. There was so ray of light to guide me even though I had traveled into the forest right beside the college and I had seen the outline of the college before I fell asleep. As I was walking, I heard the running and the movement of something much faster than me as a human.

"I started running as fast as I possibly could but I couldn't get away as I realized running only made it fun, made it a game. A girl with blonde hair and dark red eyes bit me in the neck right where my neck and shoulder connect. She had pushed venom into me so I was frozen, I tried screaming, but I forced myself quiet. She talked to someone else and realized that I was immune to her gifts so they changed me and left. I was alone when I woke to discover that she was from the vampire royalty and she left me a few rules to abide by. I fed from animals but I was young and I killed two people I knew from college. It wasn't until a few months later that I found Alice, or rather she found me. I stayed with her until members of the Volturi were stalking me and keeping tabs on my behavior. I left Alice because the Volturi threated the Cullens and my family, they know about Charlie and Renee. I have a decade to be a vampire as I always wanted, but then I'm going back to talk about what they did. The Cullens left a human, me, alone with knowledge of the vampire world, that's against vampire law. I hope that if I go back, I can stay and they'll leave the Cullens and my human family alone."

Bree begins to gasp moving away from me her eyes wide as she shakes her head, "You never told me this, Bella! Why?!"

I shrug glancing at her, "I was lonely. You were the only other vampire I had come across besides Alice and Jas. I craved a companion. I feel maternal over you, Bree. I feel as if you're my daughter and I have to protect you. I was going to travel through Canada toward Alaska. Another coven there feeds from animals. I couldn't tell you because I wasn't sure what all you knew about the Volturi themselves."

Bree shakes her head, "You were going to leave me with the coven in Alaska?"

I nod returning my gaze to Jake the wolves, "Yes, I planned too. The Cullens told me about The Denali coven in Alaska, the only other coven that feeds from animals. All other vampires feed from humans, I wanted you taken care of. I could tell you were lonely too and the Coven in Alaska would keep you safe and help you with the diet."

Bree sighs shaking her head facing away from me. Jacob sighs stepping between the wolves in front of Bree, "I can tell you that Bella does care about you. I don't know your name but I can tell that she does care. Bella always cares more for others than herself. She could have told you the truth and forced you into a place that you wouldn't want to be.

"I haven't heard of the Volturi but we've had plenty of vampire activity since last year three months after Bella's death. I can only guess that this Volturi will not care about either of you, they only want Bella for gift she probably has. Bella knows from her time with the Cullens that newborns are ruled by emotion and feeding through their first few years of life. I learned this from other things, vampires aren't so easily conquered. If Bella says she did it for your safety, I believe her."

Bree glances toward him sighing, "I believe her too. I've grown close to her, she's like my mom or sister. I couldn't let her go alone. My name is Bree, by the way."

Jake nods smiling, "Jacob Black. Now, Bella or Bree, who wants to discuss how you too met?"

I grin allowing Bree to explain that. She explains our first meeting and my choice to visit Forks for one last time. During her speech she turns toward me her eyes wide, "That's why you didn't want Alice to see your decisions. You're protecting them."

I nod frowning toward her, "Yeah, unfortunately."

I turn toward Jacob, "What does Charlie know?"

Jake sighs shaking his head, "He knows about us being wolves, but we didn't tell him about vampires. He wanted to make his own decisions and he didn't want to know everything. If it wasn't important for him to know, he didn't want to know."

I tilt my head nodding, "That sounds like Charlie. So, what now?"

Jacob grins, "Think you might want to move in around here. We could use some friends, vampires, take down other vampires."

I hear a slight squeal from beside me coming from Bree who grins, "That sounds fun, Bella. Oh please!"

I sigh groaning, "What does Sam have to say about this?"

Jacob chuckles, "We can always go find out. We'll have to bring him to the treaty marker but I'm sure he'll agree."

I glance toward Bree a little apprehensive but she grins nodding. I turn toward Jacob shrugging my shoulders, "Go get him."

I wasn't so sure Sam would agree to this.


	20. 18

_18._

**One Year Later**

I swear under my breath jumping over a boulder in front of me. I could hear sounds from the wolves behind me no doubt they were chuckling under their breath.

"Bella! Pay attention!"

I whip my head in front of me cursing once again as I narrowly dodge a tree.

"There she is!"

I glance in the direction Bree was pointing. A woman with blonde hair was running at high speed through the La Push territory. I wish I could say this was something that I thought of as fun. Considering I was dressed in a pair of stretch shorts and a tank should be the answer to that question. A year ago, Sam agreed with Jacob that Bree and I could stay in the vicinity. Unfortunately, Sam thought vicinity meant on the border of Washington and Canada. Turns out Sam had discovered that there was a house in Canada in his name. He put Bree and myself in that house choosing us to be helpers for them.

"Bella, I got her!"

I stop abruptly turning around in the direction of Bree's voice. I walk ahead to find her with her arm around the woman's neck.

"She's feisty. She won't talk though, creepy."

I stare at her face her eyes staring pointedly at me as I lower myself toward the ground in a squatting position. The golden shade of her eyes tells me she's a fellow animal drinker.

"Why are you here? Are you looking for the Cullens?"

She snarls shaking her head, "No!"

I shake my head standing to my feet hitting my hands against my shorts wiping the dirt away. Jacob in wolf along with Seth in wolf comes up behind me growling. Today, Sam and the rest of the pack are at home. Paul is on diaper duty, which I found funny while Sam is on pregnant imprint duty.

It took a long time for me to completely understand the imprint word. I sort of understood it and let it go hoping that Jake hadn't done something like that with either Bree or myself. Sam had told me repeatedly that wolves couldn't imprint on vampires. Apparently, they believe wolves imprint to create stronger wolves but it's not known for certain. Thinking about it that way, vampires can't have kids so we won't be an imprint.

I hold my hand up toward the wolves whom stop growling and barking sitting on their butts. I shake my head at them returning my attention to the woman in Bree's grip.

"My name is Bella. The girl holding you is my companion, Bree, she's still pretty strong at three years old. Who are you?"

She growls as I glance toward Bree, "Give her some room, Bree. I have a feeling she doesn't really mean us too much harm."

Bree glances down apprehensively before shrugging and giving her some room but leaving her arm around her neck.

"My name is Irina. The wolves killed my mate a few years ago. I didn't know they were the ones that killed him until a couple of months ago. I managed to get away from my coven in Alaska to here so that I can tear them limb from limb," she ends with a growl staring behind me toward the sitting wolves.

I groan shaking my head, "Who was your mate?"

Irina looks down slightly seeming defeated, "Laurent."

My eyes widen as an old image of Laurent comes to mind. The last time I had seen him was in the Cullen home mere minutes after I had gotten from Charlie's after the baseball field.

"Why would he be here? He was supposed to be in Alaska. It was the only reason Edward let him live."

Irina's head snaps up her eyes widening, "You're Isabella Swan?! The Cullens said they were staying with us for a few years because they left you. How did you become one of us without them around?"

I shake my head shrugging my shoulders, "It's a long story. They didn't do me any favors. I can't allow you to kill my friends here nor can I allow you to go back to your coven and tell them my whereabouts. We are in a bit of a pickle."

I drum my fingers along my chin as Jacob growls once toward Irina before moving to the trees. I suppose Seth is staying wolf for the time being. Jacob comes out in the shorts he carries around on his hind leg standing in front of Irina.

"Your so called mate was here on other pretenses. He was killed before Bella left for college. He was found in the forest a few miles away from Bella's house. We started to assume that the Cullens had sent another vampire to do away with Bella. We attacked because it's our birthright. He was here to kill Bella that day I don't doubt it because he kept screaming out a name Victoria."

My eyes widen but Jacob shrugs me off, "We eventually discovered who Victoria was. Shortly after dread's was killed, a vampire woman with red hair entered our lands. She had dark red eyes and she was distracted by something. We killed two vampires that day because it seemed she had gained another follower."

Bree gasps releasing Irina but Irina doesn't move. Bree shakes her head, "That must have been when she left us. I remember a woman with red hair telling me, Welcome to the army. She bit me and I was screaming in a warehouse of some place for days. This Victoria changed me and he was with her when she was killed. That was why he didn't return the next few days. We were all worried but we left and roamed the world. I can't believe this, Bella."

I wrap my arms around Jacob hugging him tightly, "I wish you would have told me, Jake."

Jacob chuckles patting my back, "Don't worry, Bella. I just didn't want to worry you."

I pull back slapping his arm watching as he laughs shaking his head. I return my attention to Irina who stands to her feet holding her arm to herself, "I'm sorry. It was my mistake. I had fallen for Laurent but he didn't seem to feel the same way about me. I can't go back to my coven, Bella. Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, and Rose are at the house. Rose and Emmett have decided against attending school once Alice and Jasper left. Edward left first and we don't know where he is because he doesn't make affirm decisions about anything so that Alice can see anything. I would like to stay here for a little while. I've lived in Alaska most of my immortal life and I want something different."

I glance toward Bree who shrugs, "She might be able to help. We believe you have a gift so maybe Irina can help or something. I'm sure she has money too, we most desperately need right now."

I nod grimacing at the last attempted shoplift. It hadn't gone so well in Seattle the last time Bree decided to go alone to get some money from another customer. That hadn't been the best situation to get away from. I was still apprehensive on even visiting Seattle or any other small town outside Seattle.

I nod smiling, "Sure, Irina, you can stay. Bree and I live in small house in Canada. I'm sure we can make room in the house for you. If not, you've money right?"

Irina smirks, "Obviously being alive for as long as I have, I've gotten some money. Of course I need to be mindful of my coven. We share the account, they'll know if something is out of place."

I nod smiling at her glancing toward Jacob and Seth, "You guys go on home. Bree and I will take Irina home."

Jake shakes his head, "Seth is patrolling for the evening. I need one of you with him since I can't tonight. Paul is with Rebecca while Sam is dealing with Emily and Sam Jr. Billy's going into Seattle tonight with Sue and Charlie for dinner."

I groan shaking my head turning toward Bree and Irina.

"Who wants to stay?"

Bree shakes her head, "Why don't we all just stay? I've been bored at the house anyway. Facebook can only do so much."

I growl under my breath nodding toward Jake, "We'll all stay. We can stay in the area for Seth."

Jacob grins nodding, "I'll see you guys tomorrow."

Jacob runs back into the forest as we all hear him shift midair by the vibration of the ground.

"So, what are we going to do?" Irina asks watching Seth run off alone.

I shrug, "We mostly just stand around. I'm still trying to get Bree comfortable with the diet. It hasn't been easy in the past year…"

I lower my gaze toward the ground remembering a hunting trip during the year. Bree and I were both hunting when we smelt a group of humans hiking off trail. I wasn't any good to Bree or myself when we both attacked them. We had both been in hunting mode so there wasn't any chance that we might not attack. If I had been alone maybe I would have resisted but being with Bree, I had to protect her from everything. She did drain more than I did as I only killed one person I didn't know. We've been hunting separately ever since because Bree feels bad not only that but we've kept away from human's for months when we smelt them.

Bree sighs wrapping an arm around my shoulders, "It'll be okay, Bella. Are you thirsty?"

I shrug her arm off my shoulders shaking my head, "No, I'm not."

Bree shakes her head sighing, "You haven't hunted in a week and a half. I can see those black circles under your eyes."

I roll my eyes shaking my head, "I'll be fine, Bree. Let's just find something to do."

Bree glares at me standing in front of me, "Irina and I will be alright. You go hunt! I don't care where you hunt or what you hunt, just please go hunt."

Irina glances at me over Bree's shoulder nodding her head, "I hate to agree with Bree, but Bella, you really need to hunt. When you're thirsty your emotions go haywire and you'll be mad at everyone. I should know, when I discovered Laurent was dead I didn't hunt for almost a month but my sisters wouldn't allow it."

I groan nodding, "Alright, just message me if you need me, Bree."

I turn around and take off through the forest jumping across the huge ravine ahead. Bree and Irina don't have a single clue of what I have under my sleeve. I could go home across the boarder and leave them to deal with the wolves but I won't do it. I'm much better than that.

I managed to hunt until I was fully sated. It meant feeding extra animals that I probably wouldn't have eaten otherwise. I was walking back knowing I wouldn't have to run because most nights aren't too busy.

Suddenly my phone started ringing in my pocket. I pull it out knowing only Bree and Jake have my number.

"Yes?"

I could hear the wind whipping in the background. This told me Bree was running at high speed.

"Bella! Get back here, please! There are three vampires here that are trying to get to the ocean. Or at least one is. They aren't vegies either."

I groan into the phone, "I'll be there."

I shut the phone taking off quickly. I'm at least ten minutes away so hopefully they can hold them away from the ocean. I jump across the ravine once again five minutes later taking a shortcut hoping to get there faster. I burst through a group of bushes running into another vampire hearing the startled scream from her throat.

I stop immediately afraid I might have hurt Bree. A blur of blonde and brown hair sails through the air hitting the ground about twenty yards away creating a crevice in the earth.

"Bella!"

I stand on the edge looking down at the whimpering vampire as Bree steps up to me.

"I didn't want you to kill the poor girl…"

I shake my head at her watching the girl in the crevice stand shakily on her feet.

"Are you alright?!" shouts Bree beside me causing me to shake my head.

"Where's Seth?" I ask Bree as she almost jumps in the crevice to help the girl.

Bree shrugs, "Hell if I know, Bella. I mean I'm not the keeper of the wolves."

"Fine, where's Irina?"

Bree stands around looking behind her shrugging, "She was right behind me. Maybe she followed Seth. He was after two males."

"Can someone help me?" the girl in the crevice whispers quietly.

I give Bree the go-ahead watching the girl smile toward Bree.

"Bella? Bree?"

I turn around at the sound of Irina's voice to see her walking out of the tree line. She looks relieved as she spots Bree and me.

"I was worried there for a moment. I heard the scream and it scared me there."

I shrug, "I accidentally hit the poor girl coming out of the tree line apparently. Where's Seth?"

Irina smirks, "He's coming. One of them gave up when they heard the scream. The other tried to escape but I cornered him."

I give her a look, "Did you have to kill him?"

She shakes her head, "Unfortunately, no. He seemed to understand why the other stopped. I believe they might be mates."

"Shell?!"

We both jump at the sound of the male voice as we turn our heads.

"Steve! You're okay!"

I watch the two vampires embrace hugging each other tightly. Bree smiles fondly toward them as I tear my eyes away. Irina gives me a pity look causing me to glare and roll my eyes.

"I hate to break up your reunion, but you have to answer some questions."

The two vampires, Steve and Shell, nod holding hands as they face us. I can Seth growling but I hold my hand up knowing he'll listen to me.

"What was your business in this part?"

Shelly looks toward her mate apparently wanting him to answer but he sighs, "We were headed for the border. We can't cross any other way. We didn't realize this was wolf territory. We won't cross again."

I frown glancing between them just as I take in the other vampire with them. This was another male vampire with thick curly hair and a faint olive tone to his skin. He's lean but muscular and he wasn't staring at me but toward Bree.

There was something in the way he stared at her that made me feel strange. I remembered that look. That look that vampires or humans get when they are staring at their reason for living.

"Who are you?"

He jumped startled by my question. He turned toward me slightly antsy, "My name is Diego. Steve and Shelly are my friends. We were all changed by another vampire named Riley. He died a few years ago after some red head came for him. We don't know the reason for it but it seemed pretty hostile. We just wanted into Canada because we haven't seen the world yet. Newborn years are the worst."

I nod shushing Seth as he barked. The other vampires flinched at the sound causing Irina to smirk. I give Irina a look which she heads. Bree walks over to me standing at my side, "We will grant you access to the ocean bided that you don't cross this area again. Forks and La Push are all off limits. Tell any vampires you come across that vampires and wolves are protecting this land. If you come back, you will be killed. I can't promise that we will be here. This land is mostly protected by it's residence of shifters. My small coven isn't always here to help."

The moon was shining down on us then giving most of us a slight scary look. Steve pulled his mate, Shelly, closer to his body.

"We will accept your offer," says Steve nodding his head toward me.

The other vampire, Diego, shakes his head, "I'd like to know something. Why are you helping them? Why haven't they killed you yet?"

I roll my eyes, "I knew a couple of wolves when I was human. I left here was changed and returned years later. Also, I don't feed from humans."

I could the confused look on his face was something that wasn't going to be good for me. My eyes were orange as well as Bree because of the hunt we had mere months ago. Our eyes were blazing red afterward but months of animal blood were giving them an orange effect.

Irina could see that I was having difficulties explain so she came in, "We all have accidents from time to time. Nothing to explain."

Diego realized the look on my face before he nodded his head, "I understand."

He turns toward Shelly and Steve before glancing toward Bree out the corner of his eye. I could tell something in his eyes was familiar to me. It reminded me of the look that a certain vampire used to give me.

He looks back toward me noticing that I seem to be coven leader, "Can we have a few moments to talk amongst ourselves, please?"

Seth growls but I shush him groaning myself, "You have three minutes, make it quick."

I turn around having Bree and Irina together as well. Bree looks at me confused, "What's the deal here?"

Irina stares at me too obviously not seeing what I just saw.

"I believe Diego is going to ask us to join our coven. I personally would be all right with it myself. I mean we could get him on the animal diet so he could try something new."

Bree groans shrugging, "If Bella's alright with it then I'm okay with it."

Irina nods, "I just joined too and it would be fun to help another with something new."

I purposely left out Diego's looks toward Bree. If it was something she wanted I wouldn't interfere. We turned around to see the other small coven had finished talking together. Diego smiled toward us his ruby red eyes sparkling, "I'd like to join you if that would be all right. I want to try your diet; maybe I'll be able to finish high school if I can get a handle on my thirst."

I smile glancing toward his other coven members before returning my gaze to Diego, "That would be fine. We'd love to have another member. Either of you are welcome to join us. We have a permanent residence in Canada right on the border incase you ever want to see Diego again."

Steve and Shelly nod grinning, "Thank you for being so understanding. We'd like to keep in touch."

I nod toward Bree who walks over smiling at them handing them a phone, "You need to get a handle on your strength. This is to keep in touch with Diego and us. Our number is speed dial number two whenever you need to talk about anything."

Diego looks a little excited to be away from the mated pair. Seth is growling behind me causing me to sigh shaking my head, "Seth, it's alright. Diego can help us. If all vampires can hunt animals, there would be no danger."

Seth grovels as Shelly and Steve say their goodbyes to Diego before leaving into the ocean. Bree and Irina stood beside Diego as I sigh turning toward Seth lowering myself on my knees, "Seth, when is Jacob coming back home?"

Seth whines as I realize he hasn't the slightest clue. I stand to my feet, groaning turning toward Bree who rolls her eyes, "We have to tell Sam about Diego?"

I nod rolling my own eyes, "Jake isn't here so we have to do it ourselves."

Bree shakes her head at me, "We can't though. That was the agreement with the elders. We would stay away from the homes in the area and only help keep the lands clear. The last time we got too close, Paul almost took out my leg and arm. I'm sorry but I'm not going too close to their homes. The elders agreed to kill us if we did again."

I sigh lowering my gaze toward the ground, "Well, we have until sunrise when Leah will arrive. We have to be careful. She'll smell Diego because it's two unfamiliar scents for her. We might be able to sneak him to the house saying that Bree wanted to go ahead and show Irina the house."

Bree smiles nodding, "That would be great. I think if you have an escort to Sam's place you'd be in the clear of the elders."

I shrug understanding turning toward Diego, "When was the last time you hunted?"

Diego frowns rubbing the back of his neck nervously, "We fed in Seattle before coming here. Steve knew that we'd be in the ocean for a while so we fed a little while. I'm not thirsty if that's what you're asking."

I sigh nodding, "That's perfect. I only asked because it's a few hours until sunrise. We're going to be here a while. In about an hour things will start heating up. Seth here will have a wolf change and you're scent is one of two the wolves don't know about."

Bree nods sighing, "Basically, Bella means that we will be standing around mostly until something comes across the lands. Most of the time it's boring around here. Today has been the most fun we've had doing this. In a year, that's saying something. In one day we've gained two new members and Bella has officially become coven leader."

I roll my eyes shrugging, "I'm sure you've gathered who's names are who?"

Diego nods grinning, "Yes, you're Bella. The other girl with orange eyes is Bree and the blonde over there is Irina."

We all nod smiling just as a gust of wind comes in from the ocean. Bree grins sighing, "I'm going to do a run by. Anyone want to join?"

I glance at Diego out the corner of my eye grinning, "Why don't you take Diego? He can learn about what all he has to do. I can get Irina started on the opposite side. We need to check in on the Forks border shortly before sunrise. Take Seth with you, any wolf will know you are both safe."

Bree smiles nodding ushering Diego to follow behind her. Seth takes off as well finally happier than he's been all night.

"You noticed it too?"

I jump at Irina's voice turning toward her nodding, "It's obvious. Bree doesn't see it because she's never been around another mated pair."

"I hope he treats her right."

I growl agreeing with Irina, "If he doesn't, he's got me to deal with."

Irina giggles as we turn walking through the trees toward the Forks border, "She's more than your companion, right?"

I sigh, "I didn't realize the maternal thing was this strong. She was just so alone when I found her that I had to take her under my wing. I suppose during the whole time I became very protective of her. It's strange; I've never felt this way before."

Irina bumps into my shoulder playfully, "Every woman has a maternal side. As a vampire that's magnified quite a bit actually."

I nod sighing taking off with Irina trailing behind me. I could tell my vampire life was about to get a little more complicated as the years went by. Bree was going to have a mate before long and Irina and I were going to be the only alone vampires in our coven. I wasn't sure how much I was going to like that in the end.


	21. 19

_19._

_**A/N: **__This particular Alice's POV is after Bella left her and Jasper. Things might be confusing at first because so much time has passed. Remember that Bella has a decade before the Volturi start searching for her. At 7 years, she has 3 years left. Alice will explain what happened from before Bella left to catch everyone up and then she'll explain what she's doing now._

**Alice's POV**

_**7 years later**_

The years were blurring together. It was hard to believe that a newborn vampire could actually hide herself from me for years. It was running on a decade that Jasper and I had been searching for her. There were strange things happening in the states that were gaining human and vampire notice alike. I didn't like the idea of strange things happening that were bizarre to vampires. We were the dominant predator yet we all didn't understand what was going on. I had the impression that one coven not living in the states knew exactly what was going on.

The Volturi.

Jasper and I had done a decent job of avoiding any guard members that were in the states. After Bella left us, we didn't get anymore problems out of the stalker. It proved Jasper's theory that Aro now knew about Jane and Alec's changing of a human with extraordinary abilities. The stalker has to be apart of the guard.

"I think the stalker is Demetri, Alice."

I glance up from my place on the log beside Jasper toward him, "What?"

He smiles at me showing his shiny teeth, "Demetri is the tracker of the Volturi. We both said he can't track her using the essence of her mind. That would make him crazy and he'd start searching for her just to see if she was different. Vampires that are used to always being able to use their gift have a crutch. When they can't use their gift it makes them slightly crazy. There no longer is that crutch and they become like the rest of us."

I nod understanding his logic, "I just don't understand why the Volturi guards would want to keep tabs on a no body vampire."

Jasper frowns sliding his arm around my shoulders, "She's not a nobody, Alice. Think about it, Alice. She was changed by Jane a skilled member of the Volturi guard and then she just so happened to know one of the most wanted members of the Cullen coven."

I nod thinking about his words. Ever since Bella left, she's done a good job at hiding. The last vision I had of her was in Arizona. I thought I had seen another vampire with her but I wasn't sure. I hadn't seen another vision since and I didn't know where else to look. We had searched everywhere looking for her. I had even talked Jasper into checking Las Vegas, which was our only lead. Something was leading me there but I wasn't sure what it was.

Jasper and I had searched high low when we came across the lightest vampire scent. The scent had been tangled with Bella's faint scent. It led to the outside of a casino, which made me so proud of her. I left Jasper outside and followed the scent into the computer lounge. I sat there in the same seat she must have sat in hoping to find something on the computer but Bella was smart. She obviously didn't want me to find her so she deleted the history as soon as she was done.

It was there when I received the vision of Arizona, which is where we are right now. Jasper sits beside me on a log with a fire blazing in front of us illuminating the night sky. We were far away from any civilization and we searched the boarder for small hotels. I quickly gave up because I couldn't see her no matter how long I searched her future.

"What if we double back to Florida? She might have gone to check in on her mother…" whispered Jasper into the fire.

I shake my head, "She wouldn't go there. I know Bella. Florida is too sunny and she knows it. What would you do Jasper? Let's say you had picked up another vampire but they fed on human blood and wanted to try the animal diet. What would you do?"

Jasper tilts his head to the side before sighing, "I'd cross the border into Canada. The new vampire would need terrain and plenty of wildlife. They should be away from civilization as they can possibly get."

I nod grinning standing erect immediately, "I think we're both right. Florida is too sunny but Forks in right beside Canada. I believe Bella picked up another young vampire and decided to make it to Canada but Bella loves family. She'd want to check in on Charlie before going into Canada."

Jasper stands to his own feet nodding his head, "That does make sense. The only problem is Bella has years ahead of us. She might not even be there any more. The vampire could already have gotten over the high thirst phase. She could easily have traveled overseas by now, Alice."

I sigh shaking my head pacing, "I don't think so, Jas. Bella would want to stay close to home to make sure Charlie is taken care of. We have to try something."

I shake my head allowing myself to fall back to the log. This makes no sense as to why Bella would go through all the trouble of hiding from us, from me especially. Suddenly Jasper's phone starts ringing from his pocket as he sighs smiling at me, "I'll be back. It's probably just Peter again."

I nod not even bothering to glance up toward him at all. Jasper's friend, Peter, from the newborn army Jasper dealt with in his early years has also been helping us. Peter and his mate, Charlotte, have been traveling recently and we told them to keep an eye out for anything new about any new vampire covens in the states. He hasn't contacted us in months which tells us more than him calling ever could. I was beginning to lose hope that I would ever see my best friend again. I had never seen someone so hell bent on hiding from me before. The only other vampire that seemed able to hide from me was Victoria as I had no idea where the hell she even was at the moment.

Maybe Edward had been right when he said that she didn't have that connection with James. Jasper said she did as he felt her emotions that day in the field. I wouldn't put it past that redhead to try something devious soon.

"Alice?!"

I jump speeding toward Jasper's side as he looks murderous, "Jasper? What's wrong?"

He shakes his head handing the phone over, "It's Esme. Rose and Emmett have gotten themselves in trouble again."

I sigh taking the phone noticing that Jasper is taking this serious. The last time Rose and Emmett had gotten in trouble was a few years ago right after Bella had left us. They had traveled away from the family and Emmett had been stupid by gaining attention from a park ranger. It hadn't been a pretty story when Carlisle had told us instead of Esme as she was still angry about it.

"Hello? Esme?"

I could hear her dry sobs as her voice came in clear, "It's about Emmett and Rose among other things. Emmett and Rose left us last year to travel as a married couple again. They didn't tell us where they were going so we got a call this morning from Rose. She and Emmett decided to check on Bella in Forks."

My eyes widen as I shake my head glancing toward Jasper who merely nods the angry look still on his face.

"What happened?"

"She discovered that Bella went to Florida for college but she was killed by an animal attack in the forest, Alice. Bella is dead and the wolves have gotten Rose and Emmett on the border of Forks and La Push."

I shake my head as something gets even worst by Esme's voice, "I called Edward. He checked in last month and I told him everything, Alice. I probably shouldn't have told him, but I did and I don't know what he's going to do."

Everything was in chaos. I could understand why Jasper was giving me that look. What were we going to do now? Edward would probably be on his way back into the states. I knew exactly where he was a month ago because he wasn't being careful anymore. From the time Edward had left her, almost an entire decade had passed because Bella had been with us about a year and a half before she ran off.

I didn't know what to tell Esme about Edward. I couldn't believe I didn't see this but it was suddenly clear why I didn't see it. The wolves were involved. There was no way that Bella knew that I couldn't see the wolves unless she had figured it out in the years she had been with them. Any decisions she made that included any of the wolves, would block any vision that might take place.

It explained why I hadn't had a vision of Bella since she left Arizona. She must have taken off with no sense of direction and wound up in Forks. With us now gone, the wolves would be protecting both La Push and Forks territory. Bella had a friendship with one of the wolves so she could easily get them to see her before they killed her.

"Esme, make sure that Edward comes to you in Alaska. Jasper and I will go and get Rose and Emmett. I'll find out everything I can before we all join you in Alaska. There are some things that need to be talked over as a family before Edward does something rash. When did you call him exactly?"

I heard her gasp sighing, "I called him about an hour ago. He wanted jet to come home, he's missed us. I think he might want to know the details of Bella's death. You don't think it was Victoria, do you?"

I shake my head glancing toward Jasper who was in emotional distress from being so close to my emotions, "I don't think so, Esme. It's Florida and I don't believe even Victoria would risk going there which would put her in the sight of the Volturi. Jasper and I have to go quickly. The wolves could do anything with Rose and Emmett. We'll get them to call you as soon as we get them. Bye Esme."

I hung up before she could protest and tossed the phone toward Jazz. I quickly put out the fire grabbing my bag from the log along with the blanket we had on the ground.

"What's the plan?" asks Jasper walking up behind me watching me speed around.

"As of right now, we rescue Rose and Emmett. We tell them the truth first. I have a feeling that Bella is around the wolves. She didn't know about the wolves blocking my visions but after all these years, she's probably figured it out. I mean if she's been there she hasn't been quiet about her decisions even if it was a slip up or something. It's been seven years since we last saw her for crying out loud. She would have been on alert for my arrival and when I didn't show, she would have realized I was blocked somehow. I don't think she'd have a companion after all this time. I just hope we can convince the wolves to help us because Edward is coming home. He'd beat it out of them before they could even blink."

I hear Jasper sigh nodding, "The question really is why they captured Rose and Emmett? Why didn't they just kill them? If it were just the wolves, they would have killed any vampire crouching on their territory…"

I turn quickly speeding toward Jasper standing directly in front of him.

"What are you thinking?"

Jasper snorts shrugging, "I'm not sure if it's possible. Do you think if they trusted Bella enough, they would have alliance for her protection? I'm thinking that for Bella to be able to move free as we once did, they would make a deal with Bella. She would help them with the vampire problem since they are now covering such a wide area. They only get a handful of vampires every so often anyway so it wouldn't be enough to start a whole new group of wolves. I mean they would trust Bella mostly because of Charlie and she would need to show them she's ferial."

I tilt my head to the side before nodding smiling, "That sounds highly plausible. It would explain about Rose and Em but if Bella were there Rose wouldn't have said she was dead."

Jasper nods, "Yeah, I was just thinking about that. I have another solution to that. Say, Bella does have a companion. Another sort of newborn that was turned slightly before Bella was. Bella wouldn't want to travel alone and there could be any vampire on the trail as she ran. She was going with no sense of direction. Not to mention the fact that Esme called us a few years ago and asked about Irina. Irina had up and left, they haven't seen her in years now. She had a problem with the wolves because of Laurent, he left her and the wolves killed him from Irina believed."

"The wolves could have killed her, Jasper. There's no telling if she is with Bella or not."

Jasper shakes his head, "If they killed Irina, why stop when attacking Rose and Em? It makes no sense, Alice. The most logical solution is that Bella has created her own small coven. It would make more sense than anything. With just Bella, the territory in both Forks and La Push wouldn't be completely covered. You'd need more wolves or vampires. Bella's coven being so close would force more wolves to shift and they know it. Bella staying full time with her coven would bring both protection and a constant vampire presence."

My eyes widen as I nod, "It does make sense now. How many do you think she has?"

Jasper sighs shrugging, "I believe including Irina maybe three or less. I don't see Bella creating another large coven because they are different. Bella has the animal diet on her side and having other vampires around would either increase her accidents or decrease them. Before Irina came to her, I would have thought Bella would have slaughtered a lot of people already. Irina is a strong vampire but with others they could lessen the amount of accidents. I also believe they don't live in the vicinity of La Push or Forks."

I understand now as I nod pacing back and forth in front of him, "The elders wouldn't feel comfortable with vampires living on their land friend or not. She couldn't stay in Forks for she would be risking exposure to her father or other people. What about Canada? I mean it's got wildlife and they would be there at a moments notice. They would have to live on the border between Washington and Canada."

Jasper smiles at me nodding, "I think it's time we called Jenks. Do you know any names of the wolves?"

I grin nodding vigorously, "Edward and Carlisle saw the wolves a couple of times before we left. Edward said Bella's friend was Jacob Black, more like family friend really. The other wolf is Sam Uley, he's the alpha."

Jasper nods flipping the phone open, "I'll call Jenks, then we move."

The wind was moving so quickly past me as I raced to catch up with Jasper. Jasper had such a different upbringing than I so he had a little more speed on me. I couldn't help but think about Bella and what she could possibly be going through right now. Edward was on my mind as well which caused me to stop immediately as a vision invaded my sight.

_Edward was running through edge of Brazil toward the airport. The plane was familiar as it was Carlisle's own private jet. Edward quickly shuffled inside as the plane began to take off._

I finally came out of the daze the vision caused to find Jasper standing in front of me with a worried smile on his face.

"What did you see, Alice?"

I sigh gazing toward the ground, "Edward made the decision to take the plane. He'll be on the jet in a few hours. I would guess he'd be in Alaska shortly probably by nightfall, we have to hurry. If Edward comes to Forks or La Push and finds out about Bella, he could do something incredibly stupid."

Jasper nods sighing, "Let's get going then. We can't stop again; otherwise we'll never make it."

We both take again running through the forest areas quickly. I keep my mind blank hoping against hope that another vision doesn't tell me otherwise. The hours blur as we finally enter the state of Washington by afternoon considering we had been running at full speed nonstop since nightfall.

By the time we make a few miles away from Forks, Jasper decides to come to a complete stop.

"It would be better not to run through the territory. They might see it as a threat or worst."

I nod as we take a back road walking along the edge of the road. This road was seldom used even though it was black top but it had too many curves. Carlisle had dealt with too many accidents on this very road where the patients were sent to Fork's hospital.

"What do you think Rose and Em were even doing around here? Most certainly on the border."

I shrug shaking my head, "I don't have a clue. I didn't see anything because of the wolves obviously. I had a bad feeling when Esme told me about them two leaving the family in Alaska."

Jasper draped an arm around my shoulders as we continued walking down the road. I wished, hoped for a vision but it never came. We Jasper was busy scouting the surrounding area not paying attention to anything else at least until the growl came from my throat. We had finally gotten closer to the border or at least to the section of town they had been visiting.

I could never forget that scent that polluted the air. Unlike human blood, the wolves smelt awful. Their blood was horrid even inside their bodies that we could never be tempted by the scent. Jasper quickly tucked me into his side sniffing the area shaking his head, "This isn't the border but I smell them already. They've come a good deal away from the border being this far out is ridiculous. They wanted to protect the entire area I suppose. What's the plan, Alice?"

I shrug shaking my head, "I don't know, Jas. You have to decide right now because I don't have my visions to help us."

Jasper nods standing completely erect in silence. I looked around us taking in the area and the strong scents assaulting my nose. It was while I was taking in the scents that I smelt that familiar smell that I would never forget. It was hard to really smell it since it was so mingled with the wolves but I knew it anywhere.

"Jas?"

"Alice, wait, I'm thinking of a plan."

I left his side knowing he'd follow as I stood on the edge of the forest. The scent was even stronger but I smelt something else that was even more familiar. Being so close to them in the past few decades I'd know that scent anywhere.

"Jas, do you smell that?"

Jasper gives up on his thinking plan coming to investigate the familiar scent tainting the area. He takes a huge whiff of the smell before his eyes widen, "That smells like Irina. The Denali's all have a similar scent to each other. I'm not sure about the other as it's so blended with the wolves, but it's similar to Bella's scent."

I nod grinning, "We have to get to Rose and Em, now. We can't afford to be late."

Jasper nods agreeing with me as I take off following the scent. The scents deviate at a certain tree in the forest forcing us to follow the wolves scent straight to the border. We slow down once we come across the faint scents of Rosalie and Emmett.

I can hear the growls from the wolves and the stretching of rope thanks to my enhanced hearing. Jasper takes my hand as we both walk out of the cover of trees. My eyes zero in on the separate trees that both Rose and Emmett are tied to by rope. Rose's clothes are all ruined and I spot a break in Rose's arm which brings a growl from my throat. These wolves have hurt Rose!

The small wolf on guard stands to his legs growling toward us. Emmett grins toward us nodding, "Alice, Jasper, long no see."

I roll my eyes glancing toward Rose, "What's going on? Esme said you two were here because of wolves. You discovered that Bella was dead."

Rosalie growls, "I told Esme that before this happened. We were running from what we thought were wolves. I'm not sure who they were the wolves are working with vampires. A small coven of about four members, I believe. Emmett counted the feet hitting the ground as we ran. I didn't get a decent look but one of them pulled my arm from my body with the help of a wolf. It still burns like crazy."

I settle my gaze on the wolf sitting on guard as he stares at me, "Seth, right?"

The wolf stares at me his eyes blazing when Rose interrupts, "He's waiting on the rest of their pack. They have quite a pack on their hands. He's not going to shift back to human because we're a threat."

I nod pulling Jasper to take a step back, "We just want our family back. We'll stay here until the pack shows."

Jasper held me close in those minutes. We were both worried about our family of Rose and Em, Bella, and even Edward. I wasn't sure what was going to happen once we told the truth to our family. I just hoped they understood that we had to grant her wish that the rest of the coven not know anything about her change.

We both heard and felt the arrival of the pack. Wolves emerged from the trees like savages growling their mouths drooling with saliva. It was both gross and fascinating at the same time. Two grown men stepped from the woods directly in the center of the group of wolves. One held his hand out calming the wolves and they immediately ceased growling but they were all still guard. Even Seth stepped back into line with his brothers of the pack. They were all so well organized that I was amazed that animals could follow instructions.

I stepped forward causing a few growls from a couple wolves before I smiled, "I'm Alice Cullen. I just want my family back and we'll get off your land."

The older man the one that calmed the wolves was the alpha, Sam, as he stepped forward nodding, "We were just curious as to why they were on our property…"

I shake my head, "I can't talk for them, but Rose and Em would never step over the border. Forks has been Cullen territory since the treaty."

Sam shakes his head, "Cullens haven't been here in years. When a vampire comes on the land, we retaliate against them. You be sure to inform the rest of your coven of this information. The only reason we didn't tear limb from limb is because of their eyes. If they had been red, they would be dead and all you'd have of them would be their ashes."

Something about the way he says those words is different. He still wants them dead but someone or something else stopped him from giving that order to his brothers.

I could feel Jasper tugging on my arm probably to stop my next outburst but I was confident she was here. Whether she was in the vicinity or not was questionable but I was positive these wolves knew where she was. Rose herself said that vampires were working with the wolves protecting the area and they had help severing her arm from her body.

"Where's Bella, Sam? I'm not an idiot. I know her scent as a vampire and it's here. It's hard to tell but I can smell it. It's so blended with yours it's hard for someone else to tell but I know for sure. I've seen her and she left."

Rose and Emmett were both staring at me their mouths wide open. This wasn't the time for outbursts but I couldn't stop it. I hadn't seen her in seven years and I had to know where she was.

Sam froze for a second before he looked at me, "Your friends here discovered that Bella is dead from an animal attack. She's not here as a vampire or human."

I glanced at Jasper to see him staring at Sam with suspicion, "Sam, we both know you're lying. Bella is our family; she left us seven years ago. You had been start telling us something."

Sam sighs glancing toward the younger man beside him, "Jake, you must decide."

It was then I realized this was Jacob Black, Bella's friend, as a human, that lived on the reservation. He stood from Sam shaking his head, "She checks in every now and then. We haven't seen her in a few months. It's her coven that helps us out. She hasn't been with the two that usually help us. Bree and Diego usually help us and it was Diego that tore your friend's arm off. We aren't sure if they are still in the house in Canada or not. The last time I saw Bella she was jumpy. You should stay away from her because she left you for good reason. I'm sure by you've figured it out."

Jasper nodded toward me basically giving me the information I already knew. Jacob Black was telling the truth, he hadn't seen Bella and he knew why. Bella was running from the Volturi or had made a certain deal with them. She was watching her back attempting to keep her family and friends out of the fight. Jasper places his hand on my shoulder, "We need to get Rose and Em. We can search for Bella afterward the entire family knows and understands the situation."

I nod as we watch Jacob and Sam untying Rose and Emmett, "You should all be careful on the lands. Be sure to let us know if your coven moves back onto the land. We'll stay on our land then cleaning the area of vampires."

I nod watching Rose being untied last after Emmett. They both sped to our side before glaring toward the wolves. Jasper and Emmett were busy inspecting Rose's arm as she hissed between her teeth.

"Why was Rose hurt?"

Jake looks at the ground sighing, "It was a misunderstanding. Diego and a wolf weren't on the same thought process. I believe they were making a game out of it. Diego didn't listen to the words 'capture do not destroy.' Bella actually created those words because she wanted vampires to have a chance at a decent life. If they came back or tried to fight us, we killed then and only then."

I nod, "We'll be leaving but you can expect us back. I can only guess that Edward and the rest of the family with be anxious to talk with you."

Sam nodded smiling, "We look forward to it."

Sam and Jake signaled for the majority of the wolves to leave as only couple would make sure we left. I shook my head at Rose and Emmett's curious gazes, "Not here. We need to put as much distance between us and Forks as we can."

For once, neither Rose nor Emmett attempt to disagree as we all take off in the forest. We speed away from the wolves and the horrid scent hoping against all odds that we can figure some of this out. Jasper leads the group running completely outside of the Forks border before Rose comes to a halt. I call out to Emmett and Jasper to stop and turn around for Rose.

"Rose, we can't stay here," I mutter cutting off when she glares strongly toward me.

"Alice hasn't been so truthful. Please explain how you know that Bella's a vampire!"

Emmett attempts to calm Rose down by rubbing hers but she shakes him off, "You didn't change her, did you, Alice?!"

Jasper comes to stand beside me shaking his head, "We found Bella in Nashville. Alice had a vision of Bella changing into a vampire and her accidents along the way. Bella stayed with us for about seven to eight months give or take. There was another vampire following us, we believe it was a Volturi member. The stalker started becoming more bold in following Bella everywhere she went. Alice and I had gone hunting when we came back to find Bella gone, disappeared. At first I tried to explain to Alice she probably just went for a hunt but the days past. Her scent grew faint in surrounding area of our house. Her stalker was gone as well and Alice started pack two days later. Bella had left a note saying she was hunting but she never returned. She had two days jump on us by the time we realized. We've searching for Bella since she left which was seven years ago. The last vision Alice received she was alone in the vicinity of Las Vegas. We traveled into Arizona hoping to catch her scent but it was too faint. Bella obviously has a companion that is making the decisions. Alice can't see past the wolves so Bella must have figured it out. She couldn't go so long without making a single decision concerning her own well being. Esme called us and told us what you had discovered. We came straight here after the call."

I nod as Rose and Em shake their heads Rose looks a little upset, "Why didn't you tell us about her?"

I shake my head placing a hand on Jas for him to step back. He understands as I straighten myself, "Edward already didn't want Bella becoming one of us. I didn't know what he would say. He would jump to conclusions that I had changed her or something equally as worse. Rose, you never wanted this life for Bella. I would have changed it if I could have. I tried to tell Edward that she was going to be one of us no matter what he did, but her refused to listen to a word I said. Jane from the Volturi changed Bella along with her brother Alec. I wasn't there because I didn't know what day it was going to be when she was turned. Bella is also still very distraught over the entire family leaving her behind. She refused for anyone to know but us. I left everyone in Alaska when I received the first vision of Bella's graduation. I missed her like we all did but we were abiding by what our brother wanted. I couldn't do anymore once he left. If he could leave us, so could I."

Rose shakes her head pulling away from Emmett, "I just we had known the truth before telling Esme. What do you think Edward's going to do?"

I shrug shaking my head, "With him, I don't know. I just hope that he doesn't call Charlie because Charlie will tell him everything and then I'll have a hell of time stopping him from doing something so stupid."

Jasper glances at me in concern causing me to sigh, "I didn't tell you, Jas, because there's nothing we could do. If Edward discovers the proof that Bella is dead and we can't find her, he'll go to the Volturi."

Everyone gasps around me as I lower my gaze toward the ground, "I know and that's why I kept quiet. It was a year ago when I got the vision of Edward being in Italy. It made no sense at first until I saw him on his knees before Aro. That's why it's imperative that we get to Alaska as soon as possible."

Emmett finally speaks, "Running would probably get us there faster but I'm not too sure about running. If Bella is in the vicinity we'll need her there with us."

I shake my head, "We can't find her. If it's just us without Edward, she won't come with us. All the proof we have is in the wolves thoughts. If there is the slightest chance we're telling the truth, Edward will investigate. He can read both mine and Jasper's thoughts but we could easily lie. He won't have that as proof, I know him. Our best bet is talking with him and convincing him to see the wolves."

Everyone nods as we walk through wooded area. Jasper steps beside me as he sighs, "Where's Edward now?"

A vision comes to me showing Edward still on the plane and the time. I grin bumping flirtatiously, "He'll be there when we get there."

Rose and Emmett chuckle before taking off through the forest. I place a hand on Jasper's arm smiling, "How about instead of running we take the jet at the airport?"

I hear Rose and Emmett double back grinning. Jasper chuckles, "There is a jet in Canada. If we make it that far, we can use the jet."

I nod leaving them in the dust grinning wickedly. I just hope we can convince Edward that we're telling the truth. I just hope that the rest of the family will forgive me for keeping this from them.


End file.
